The Memoirs

Shayla had been a lot more shaken up than she'd ever admit by Dick grabbing her and running out with her. She couldn't stop him; she had fought against him, and she couldn't stop him. It had taken someone bigger, someone stronger--Clark--to stop him.

She didn't even assume to think she knew what Pete felt like. But maybe she did, just a little bit. She made sure not to wake him up with her hot shower--she was in it almost half an hour, trying to scrub off the feel of Dick's naked skin against hers through rain slick clothes, and she was chilled to the bone.

Finally, she couldn't feel the heat from the water any more, and she got out, wrapping her hair in a thick towel and her body in a huge, shapeless terrycloth robe.

The rain was pouring. Hard. It was all he was completely aware of, as he awoke. He'd felt for Shayla and hadn't seen her close... his heart had caved as he felt for her. The sounds coming from the shower was only a brief comfort, before he rolled back onto his side.

His body ached. Everywhere. He'd taken a shower, shaking uncontrollably, and had crawled under the sheets without another word said. He felt... he felt powerless, and he hated it. And now, awake again, on his back, staring at the ceiling. Numb. Couldn't believe he was where he was in his life right now, couldn't believe what had happened to him, couldn't believe he'd cheated on his girlfriend, and got taken against his will. Couldn't believe how much his ass hurt, how ripped and sore he felt, and how... how bad it could be.

Because he'd wanted to fuck a guy, he had broken the best thing in his life. And she didn't even know.

Shayla almost jumped when she heard him moving, and quieted her pounding heart. "Pete. You're awake?" she asked softly, pulling the robe tighter around her as she sat down on the edge of the bed, touching his knee lightly.

"Yeah." Quiet, voice grating like sandpaper. "Im awake. You alright?"

"I'll be okay," she said, moving her hand to take one of his in both hers. "You?"

The room was so dark... seemed so much darker now, as she held his hand. He shifted under the sheets... wearing Dominic's old boxers and t-shirt, because he couldn't have stood being naked. Not now. No. His fingers tightened on hers, very hard, and brought her close to him, for a soft kiss as his heart broke. Ruined it, ruined it, and because he couldn't just shut the fuck up over it, he had to speak. But how could he? How could he see her heart break?

Shayla brought her hand up to stroke over his face and his cheek, kissing his mouth softly and rubbing her cheek against his. "You want something to eat?" She crawled into bed beside him, and slid one arm around his waist and cuddled close to him.

He shook his head, hard, lips trembling. Oh, God. And she was being good to him, and no. No. He shook his head, softly again, and gripped her hip softly for a tight moment before letting go. "I have to go."

"No, please don't." She wrapped her arms tighter around him. "You're not okay, I know you're not, don't go. Because if you go, by the time I see you tomorrow, you'll be all... Pete-ish. You'll have the smile for everybody and you won't say anything."

"You're going to hate me." Pete said softly, and now he trembled, as courage spiked hard in his chest. Now or never, and he didn't want to but he had to, and he let go enough to sit up, his arms tensing tightly around himself and his voice, broken and trembling, spoke. "I love you. So, so much. You're everything to me."

"I'm not going to hate you." She sat up with him, and curled into his side, head on his shoulder and arms safe around his waist. "I love you, Pete. I'm not going to hate you, whatever you tell me." She touched his face lightly. "Don't be afraid."

"You're going to hate me." He whispered it again, as he buried his face in his hands. "Hate me, and think you're not worth it. You're worth it. You're worth everything. I was stupid, and he asked and begged and I couldn't... and he was there, and I couldn't say no. I'm so sorry, Shayla. I'm so, so very sorry. If I could take it all back, I would. Every bit of it. Everything. I love you."

She shook her head, and kept stroking his arm. "Sssh. It's okay. I'm not going to hate you because of what he did to you, Pete. I'm not. I promise. I know... I know how much bigger he is. I know how hard it is to get away from him. I couldn't, not until Clark... well, saved me, I guess, but I know. Okay? I'm not going to hate you for it."

"No, no, you don't understand." Rolled away from her and up to his feet, as his fingers viced and tightened, as he hugged himself. "He didn't... at first. He asked, begged for me. I didn't... I didn’t' say n-no." Oh, God, and he sounded as bad as he seemed, as horrible as he seemed, and he couldn't look at her, as his body shook and he gripped his arms tightly to his chest. "Shay, I said yes."

At that, she blinked. And a little ball of hurt lodged in the pit of her stomach. "I don't... understand? You said... you said yes? At first?"

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." He turned around, begged it with eyes like midnight, and a face pale. "I'm so sorry. Baby, I'm sorry. I love you, I'm sorry. He and I had a fight, at the party. Asked everything, and I didn't... I'm sorry. Oh, baby, I'm so sorry."

"Okay, what? I mean… what?" She was just staring at her boyfriend, wrapped up in a huge fluffy pink robe, almost lost in it. "You had a fight at the party, and how does that affect what you just said?"

"We h-h... had a fight. He asked for me back, and I said no. But... but at the apartment, he... not in his ri.. right mind, and he came on to me, and I couldn't... I'm sorry, I'm so sorry." Panic was fluttering hard in his chest and his fingered tightened, as he looked at her. "I'm so very sorry, baby."

"You... you.... he asked you back? and you said... and you said yes?" It was all her mind could process right then. "You... you wanted him? To fuck you? And you said yes?"

"I didn't want him back. I said no, I didn't... I didn't say yes to him. He's dead. But he came and… and begged, and...I.." Am so fucked. Lost everything, in a single day, and he could barely breathe. Panic was hard and fear was harder, and he felt his skin break out into a cold sweat. "I'm so sorry."

"He came, he begged, you fucked." She looked up at him then, tears shimmering in her eyes. "You... you slept with him. You... you told me. You told me you didn't want to be with him." Sudden burst of anger, and she hurled a pillow at him. "Lying son of a bitch!!"

He backed up a step, gasping as the pillow hit his chest, and he nodded, squeezing his arms tightly around his chest. "I didn't... half way, through, I d-didn't want him anymore, I didn't, I begged him to stop but he... he wouldn't. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Shayla. I'm sorry."

"Get out." She said it softly.

He choked on the sob, squeezing his arms tightly around his chest and nodding, as he reached down to get his clothes. Pulled his on, his shirt, and grabbed his wallet before he could turn to face her again. Heart? Destroyed. And it was of his own doing. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

"You fucking lied to me, Pete." She curled up in her bed. "You told me that it was just me."

"It is. Its just you." Voice cracked now, and he shook his head, biting his lip tightly. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry you got involved with me. I'm just… I'm sorry, Shayla."

"It's not just me. I can't give you a cock up your ass, and apparently..." her voice cracked, and she swallowed down hard on it. "And apparently that's what you need more than me."

"I didn't..." Another chook, and he looked away. Her voice doing that thing in the middle of talking just... it broke his already smashed heart into shards. "I didn't want it… I begged him to stop. I just hurt. I love you, Shayla, its you."

"If you love me so much, how could you say yes?" She looked up at him as tears rolled down her cheeks. "If you said no, that's one thing. I could deal with that, and I broke a goddamned baseball bat over his head for it. But you saying yes... Pete, that just changes everything."

"I'm sorry. I'm just… I'm so sorry." Pete shook his head, and he wanted to beg for her forgiveness, and knew, as he watched the tears roll down her face, that there was no forgiveness for this. "I'm so sorry. I love you. I'm sorry."

"Don't say it, Pete. Don't say it cause it's not true." She sobbed it softly. "It's just... it's not true. If it were, you wouldn't have."

"Its so true. Shay, baby, its true." And now he did beg, as he stepped forward, arms held halfway out to her. "Baby, I love you so much. I'm so sorry for being weak. I love you, so much."

"Don't touch me." She jerked away from him, and instead, curled up on herself. "Just... don't touch me."

He looked away then, licking his lower lip as he bit it, looking at her with glazed eyes of his own. "I'll go. I'm sorry."

"I don't want to see you ever again," she said quietly.

Breaking up with him and his breath caught as panic hit hard, and he turned, stumbling slightly to get to his shoes. Bent down to get them up and his body screamed in agony, his heart above the cry and he got his shoes on as fast as he could, and got out. Opened her door... closed it behind him, and it was the second time, in two months, that he'd been asked to leave by his lover for something he'd done.

He couldn't take it anymore. He couldn't take anything anymore. And he knew, beyond all things, that he had never felt this badly in his entire life.

As soon as his door shut, Shayla let go of the sobs that she'd held in for as long as she could. Part of her wanted Pete's arms around her, soothing her quietly and telling her not to cry, that he loved her, just as he always did.

And that just made her sob all the harder.

~*~*~

He was stumbling through the house, blind. Horror, panic, sadness. Numb. He went through the kitchen... ignored Ms. Bird calling out to him, and walked through the house. Never belonged here anyway, never did, fuck. Didn't see his big brother until he was ramming into him, and he looked up with enormous, cloudy eyes.

The last person he ever wanted to see when he had just broken up with his girlfriend because some guy fucked him up the ass was his brother.

Dogwood had just given his slicker and his umbrella to the Latino guy at the door when his baby brother rammed into him. "Yo, Petey, head's... up? Whoa. Look like a Mack truck just hit you, brother? What's wrong?"

"Nothing. I'm going home." Cracking voice and thick and GOD DAMMIT.

"Okay, no. You're not. Cause see? DW's in town now. And you're not gonna do that Papa Ross bullshit with me, okay? You might be one tough nut, but I'm the nutcracker. And we're goin'. Get your shit. Yo! Dude! Gimmie my shit back!"

Enrique simply lifted a brow and walked back over from the closet he'd been hanging the rain slicker up in, and handed them back over.

"I c... I gotta g-go home, and change." Said softly as he wrapped his arms tightly around himself.

"Bullshit you do, man." He blinked. "Thanks, dude." Dogwood put his coat back in, and put his umbrella back over his shoulder. "Now, you comin', or am I draggin' yo'ass outta here?"

"No, I need clothes." he said quietly, even as he followed his brother, arms tight around himself.

"Fine. I got shit in the car you can change into."

"Okay." He lifted his coat from the chair, pulling it on himself as he walked with his brother out to the car.

"Good."

- = - = -

Dogwood pushed his little brother through the door of Denny's Restaurant, and nodded at the waitress. "Booth for two, kinda out of the way?"

Hadn't said a word the entire drive. It was pouring rain, water pounding the streets like the heavens had opened up. It almost sounded like someone weeping, but in the usually peaceful falling water, Pete could find no peace. His mind was in turmoil, his body and soul on fire with pain, and he flinched at the bright lights as they entered the restaurant, looking away and wrapping his arms around his chest.

His brother had given him black ratty jeans and a sweater, but Pete didn't mind. it wasn't his clothes. Had to have them burned.

Dogwood was quiet as they were led to a booth in the back of the restaurant, given coffee and menus, and left alone. "Well, little brother. You gonna talk, or do I gotta start pullin' it outta your ass?"

Bad choice of words and he set his head on the table... just laying his temple on the Formica and shuddering.

Dogwood sighed. "Petey... come on. I'm your big bro."

"Shay broke up with me."

A blink, and then a stare. "You mean that cute little blond thing that Mama's already plannin' the weddin' for?"

A soft nod, and his voice was thick. Didnt bother looking up, just staring off as his nose and eyes got red. "I cheated on her."

Another blink. "What the fuck did you do that for, man?"

"Its complicated." His voice was getting thick now, and he just shook his head, pressing a hand to his face. "She said she doesn't want to see me anymore."

"Complicated don't cut no bullshit with me, Peter Ross. Gimmie the skinny."

A slight shake of his head....much as he could with his head smushed to the table.

Dogwood reached over and levered Pete's face up. "Spill it, bro. Now. Or I'm gonna bust down that little girl's room and find out from her."

"You'll..." He never thought he'd have to tell his brother he was bi, or gay, or whatever it was that he was, but his chin trembled as he looked at someone he'd looked up to for so long.

"I'll do it, bro. Spill it." He looked piercingly. "All shit aside, Petey. Tell me. Or I'm tellin' Ma somethin's up."

"It w... was a guy." The word croaked from him and he lowered his head again, shrugging away from the gaze he knew would come his way.

"A guy doin' what?"

"Me."

"And she found out about it?"

No shock. No displeasure. No horror. And Pete didn't dare look up. "H... he got forceful. I told him no, mid way, c... cause I didn't want to hurt her. It was a mistake. And... and I told her, just a while ago, that I wanted it at first. And she… she told me n-never to look at her again."

Dogwood nodded. "The picture is startin' to come together. I'm guessin' you had an Auld Lane Syne with this ex-boyfriend'a yours, but when you realized what you had goin' for ya, you told him to get lost, only he didn't get."

A nod and a hard snuffle, as he finally looked up. the sweater was way too big, and he rubbed his wet face with a sleeve softly, sniffling again as he crossed his arms tightly around his chest. "I suck."

"Now that's info I don't need to know about m'little brother." He punched Pete lightly in the shoulder. "First thing you gotta do is, decide what the hell you want."

"You're not grossed out?" he asked softly, unable to meet his brothers eyes as he asked it.

At that, he snorted. "Pete, I seen people puttin' their dicks in all kinds of things, including other men. You run with the artist crowd, occasionally you find someone who does a little bitta everythin'."

"H..." Still coudlnt meet his eyes, as he sipped softly at the milk the waitress had brought them a while ago. "Have...have you ever?"

"Not as a lifestyle choice, no, but I've dipped my wick a time or two, yeah."

At that, he glanced up in shock. "You?" His BROTHER? Straight as a fucking pin?!

"Me." Dogwood nodded. "Now, if we're done with Personal Revelations 101, let's get back to what the fuck you gonna do to get your girl back, assumin' she's the one you want."

"H... his name, was Dick. He... he and I went... for a while. Almost a year. And then… his old boyfriend? Came back. And it turned out… Sam was actually Dick, and he wasn't 18, he was 21. And… he wanted the old guy back. So he… he left me hanging, and we... we broke it off. And she... Shayla, she was the rebound. But I love her. But I still love Sam, even though he's gone. And I wanted... I w... wanted to have... have a guy, and I cheated on her."

"Gotta ask you, bro. First, is this guy as gone as you think, if he's comin' back for you? And second, do you love her much as you think you do, if you're dippin' in other pots?" He leaned back as the waitress refilled their little coffee pot, and then he waved her off.

"I w.." Hot, dark flush. "I wasn't... dippin', man."

"If you went with the guy, you were dippin' in other pots. Call it whatever you wanna, man, but you gotta decide, do you wanna go with your old guy, or your new girl?"

"Shay. Sam... he's gone. Dick tries to bring him back, but he's a cocky mother fucker. Sam wasn't, he wasn't like that. Dick isn't for me, Shay is. I love her. I just...want sometimes and I feel bad."

"Didja ever talk to your girl about what you want?"

"Yeah. ....Naw, man. No. can't... I insinuated, but she's a little...she's dense, sometimes, 'bout sex. And... we... its been rocky, and... I didn't want to make her think I didn't love her. And now I just fucked everything over."

"A little dense, or a little virginal?"

Shit. Pete looked at his brother in horror... and his head thunked back on the table, voice muffled. "I'm an asshole."

"Naw, man. You're the dense one in the relationship. Mama said it herself after you two left. Girl's cute as a button, and CJ figured you hadda been her first."

"I'm an idiot. My God, I'm a fucking idiot. Oh, God." he lifted his head, and stared at his brother. "I don't deserve her."

That earned a snicker. "Ain't no man on this earth deservin' of any woman that loves him."

"Truth. Said. You." He set his head in his hands. "What the fuck am I going to do."

"You serious about gettin' her back? I gotta plan for ya." He rubbed his hands together, and grinned at his little brother.

"Cut my dick off, sew my asshole shut, and never have sex again?"

"Nah, that's goin' too far. This starts out with roses, and goes from there."

"Man, she won't care. I cheated on her with another dude. How is she gonna give a shit about flowers?" He said softly, as he stared down at the pancakes his brother had apparently ordered at some point. No way could he even taste them, so he just looked back up.

"Cause she loves you. Even if you hurt her, that ain't gonna go away. You just... gotta show her."

"I love her. I love her, so much. I adore her." Pete said softly, rubbing his hands over his face. "I can't believe I told you I'm a queer."

"Yeah, well, I told you that I've had it up the ass a couple times myself, so I think we're all on even footin' here." Dogwood raised an eyebrow at him.

Another shocked.... he thought... shit. "Have you ever told anyone but me?"

"No, I haven't. Not cause I'm ashamed of it, but that doesn't exactly come up in reg'lar conversation, y'know?"

"Thank you." Pete said softly, as he gazed at his brother. "For... for sharing, with me." A rub at the back of his neck as he looked away a moment. "I thought if I ever said anything, mama would go ballistic."

"Mama guessed it, Petey." Quiet. "I mean, not that i was here or anything, but she said you were spending all that time with Sam, that somethin' had to be going on."

Oh "Fuck." He whispered, eyes wide. "Christ. Shit. Dammit. And here I thought I was fuckin' sneaky."

"She don't care, Pete. Well, yeah, she cares, but she's not disownin' you or nothin'. Ma's just worried about you, makin' sure you're not hurt."

"What about CJ? Does she know about him, too?"

"That he's the biggest womanizer on this side of Pluto? Hell yeah."

"Naw, man. About that chick that--" Wide eyed. "Never mind." CJ had threatened extremities if he told and he quieted, immediately, swallowing hard.

"About that chick that what, Petey?" Dogwood glared. "I ain't gonna run to Mama about it, don't worry. What you say to me stays with me."

"Just... he thought she was pregnant, she was, she lost the baby. He loves that girl a whole hell of a lot... Tracy, man. That on and off again chick."

"Oh, that bimbo. Mama thinks she ain't got a brain cell in her head. But no, she don't know about the baby, and she ain't gonna from me."

Pete nodded softly, gnawing slightly on his lower lip as he shifted around gently, frowning. He didn't touch the pancakes, but lifted his fork so his brother wouldn't feel bad, poking at them softly as he thought. "Give... give her flowers?"

"Well, you gonna start with givin' her flowers. And you gonna work your way up the ladder to kissin' her ass."

"I love her so much." Pete said softly, shaking his head as he looked at his brother. "I never thought I could, but loving her is so natural. like I was made to do it, and I just had to figure that out. You know? Like, she loves me just cause I'm me, man. It helps."

Dogwood gave his brother a little grin. "Now that sounds nice, man. I ain't never found it, ain't known that many people who have, but if you got it, you can't throw it away. You gotta work for it, little bro. And with me behind ya? We're gonna get you workin'."

"Adore her. I adore her. I want to have kids with her, and marry her, and take care of her." Pete said softly, shyly now as he looked down. "And that's why I don't know why the fuck I screwed it up with her. I don't know."

Dogwood reached over the table, and put his arm around his little brother's shoulders. "I don't know either, but we're gonna make it right. I promise."

~*~*~

Today had been the day from hell. And Chloe had been very, very, very vocal about it. It was seven thirty on the dot before she was anywhere near visible again. All of her nails were broken, her hair follicles had been ripped up by her rubber bands and scrunchies that had been used throughout the day, there was dirt in every corner of her body, and she was tired. Her dad was off with the Mystery Woman again doing sexy things she didn't want to even CONSIDER knowing about, and she stepped out of the shower, towel hooked around her chest. Her boyfriend, the poor baby, was snoring on the bed, and she kissed his clean, damp cheek as she went about making herself presentable again.

Warm up pants in blinding pink with white stripes, and a white zip up hooded sweater. Pink and white tennis shoes, and she pinned her hair up, applying precious makeup. And as she sat there, with her eye shadow and lipstick in hand, she stared at herself. Whitney, behind her, sleeping in the mirror, and he was just... he was so beautiful. And she was so scared, because she loved him, so much. So much more than anyone else, ever. He was a good, decent man who honestly loved her, and all she did was fuck it up.

And she knew in her heart that when they finally broke up, as it was inevitable, it'd be because of her. Because she made continuous mistakes, continuously hurt him.

Except living without him seemed unacceptable, and she sniffled, hard, before going back to applying her makeup. They were going to go out, as soon as she could get him awake, and find out why Pete, Shay, Clark or Lex hadn't shown up today, when they vowed they would. And she planned to give each and every single one of them a good ass chewing.

Whitney's eyes were slitted. He was mostly asleep, awake just enough to know he didn't really want to be. He wanted to go to bed and sleep through the next week uninterrupted. He grunted as he curled up on his side, pulling one of Chloe's pillows down and snuggling around it. "C'me t'bed."

Oh, he was awake. So much easier, and she finished applying her lip gloss which she'd chosen instead, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear before crawling in behind him. He was so big, so strong, and she snuggled against him like a great big snugglerer, wrapping an arm through his, and around his waist as she cuddled him close. "Sleepy head."

"Deserve it." He turned over and burrowed his face into her warm chest, tugging her in close and squeezing her waist. "Smell good. Sleep now."

"can't sleep now. Must find friend. Friend ditch us. Friend bitches." Chloe grumbled back, then giggled and pressed her face into his hair, as the pang of the thought from before came back. And she just held him, a little tighter, burrying her face in his damp hair and rubbing her newly made-up cheek into it.

"Let 'em be bitches," he whined. "Sleeeeeeeep."

"We can't, baby. We have to see if they're okay." But she could allow a cozy snuggle, pressing his head closer to her chest and hugging him with a leg over a naked hip. "You're so beautiful."

"Mmmm." He kissed her chest lightly, and snuggled his face more firmly into her cleavage. "Tell them to fuck themselves and I'll kick their asses later."

"They're probably fucking. Come on, they're our friends." Giggled softly, as she stroked a palm down the back of his head and neck, so gently, over and over. "You are beautiful. So handsome and wonderful. So nice. I love you, so much."

He rolled his head back to grin up at her. "I love you too, Chloe." His eyes sparkled sleepily as he kissed her chin, and snuggled her close. "If they're fucking, why are we interrupting instead of, oh, I don't know, sleeping?"

"Beeecaaause. We don't know if they're fucking. And the last time we didn't ask, everything went to hell." She snuggled his hip closer to her, bearing down and wiggling in gently so she could wrap her arms around his neck more snuggly, and sighed into his temple. "You smell... very nice."

"Thank you." He snuggled in against her tightly. "You smell all... flowerly. Nice. Yummy."

"You sound half drunk." She teased it, as she stroked his blond locks from his eyes, bringing his cheeks to an angle so she could lean in and give him a soft kiss. "Come on, sweetie. Only for a little bit. And then we can come home and sleep, okay?"

God, she loved that. Come home.

Whitney snorted. "M'not drunk. M'sleep. There's difference." He snorted, and then opened his eyes to look up at his girl. "Beautiful girl."

"A drunk caveman, then." But she smiled, very tenderly stroking her lovers hair and nuzzling his nose. He smelled like her shampoo… like honeysuckle and Caress soap, which on him smelled so outrageously masculine. Soft, licking kiss to his cheekbone... then a tender smoochie to his nose, and right under one eye, where all his soft freckles were dusted. "I love you."

Whitney's arms squeezed her again, and he blinked up at her. "You're going to seduce me into your wicked plan of waking up."

"Of course I am." Another grin at him, setting her forehead on his own and squeezing him tight. "I do love you, Wheaties."

"Wheaties?" He cracked his eye open, and grr'ed softly at her as he attacked her throat with tickling bites. "You win. Let's go and kick ass, then come home and sleep."

She squealed and pretended to try and push him off, which only succeeded in bringing him closer. More giggling laughs and she snuggled him, rolling over him and grinning down. "Don't think we'll come home and sleep, baby."

"Mmm. We'll come home and fuck then." He reached up and rubbed his fingertips over her lips.

A glare, then, as she bit the tip of his first finger. "We won't 'fuck'. We'll make love. And now? We won't do that." Another bite, before she stuck her nose in the air.

Whitney leaned up and licked her chin. "M'sorry. You're right. We'll stay up all night making love."

"Nope. You're in trouble now, buster." She huffed at him and sat up, swinging her very, very pink legs off the bed and climbing to her feet. "Come on, get your lazy bones dressed. I had some of your clothes in the closet, they're on my chair over there." Yeah, finding his clothes hanging neatly beside hers had had little parts of her kicking in joy.

Whitney leaned unrepentantly over the side of the bed, and dragged his girlfriend back by the waist as he nuzzled the back of her neck. Her pinned-up tickled his nose as he kissed and whispered soft words against her skin.

Glare, but she plopped back on the bed with her back to him as he snuggled and licked and said soft things to her, and alright. Sigh. She snuggled back against his very naked self and looked at him over her shoulder... heaving a very put upon sigh even as she smiled crookedly. He was... going to be the death of her, that was for certain. He was just... he was so wonderful.

Even if he was a cad.

"There we go." He snuffled softly against her skin, placed a wet lick to the back of her neck, and then bounced off the bed. "Clothes, you say?"

He bounced, she toppled, and she sighed at him from flat on her back on her sheets, looking up at him and just...rolling her eyes as she rolled onto her side, propping her head up with her hand and crossing her legs off the side of the bed. Checking him out, pointedly and obviously, and her eyebrow rose in appreciation as she licked her lips. "Mmm?"

Whitney held his arms out to the side. "Do I... pass muster, Drill Sergeant?"

"Maybe." Teasingly said, as her other eyebrow rose. "Maybe I should see you sweat though, before I'm quite sure on all those muscles."

Whitney snapped off a quick salute, pulling on the clean jeans and the white tank-cut undershirt. "Ma'am yes ma'am."

A giggle and her palm cupped her chin before she rolled over back onto her back, still watching him as she lounged.

Whitney dropped to his knees beside the bed, and just looked at her. "Right about now, you tell me to drop and give you twenty," he whispered softly.

Oh, and his words had a lot of meaning, and she bit her lip, gazing at him in just... complete, total adoration. Complete love. "I don't want you getting that sweaty. And besides, its the wrong kind of sweaty." She leaned forward and licked a stripe, bisecting his lips.

Whitney crawled up in bed over her, and settled over her in push-up position. His hands were on either side of her head, and his toes dug into the mattress right at her feet. He lowered himself down, pressing all of his weight into her body as he kissed her quickly, and then pushed himself back up. "One."

Oh, God. She just... shivered all over, eyes wide as she looked up at him, tingling from her head to her feet as his arms rippled beside her head, mouth shuddering open when he lowered himself and she felt him… all over. Oh... God. All of his body was tense, his muscles just… and she… oh.

He did a second push-up, this time undulating his hips lightly against her groin before leaning over and whispering in her ear. "Two."

Oh, she groaned that time, her much smaller fingers shivering up to touch his arms... feeling them tense with the exertion, muscles corded and oh, God. He was so, so much stronger than her and it was so painfully arousing, so much so that she had to squeeze her thighs together, shuddering and arching without control of her body. "Oh, God."

"Still the wrong kind of sweaty?" He stayed on his hands and toes for a moment before lowering down, rocking against her once and resting his weight on her before pushing back up. "Three."

"Three." She repeated, whimpering softly as she arched, bringing her fingers down to rub over herself where she was burning with heat, groaning softly as she arched her back up so her tense chest touched his. Oh, God. Oh. God. His hips were like iron, his legs tense and strong, and he wasn't exerting any force whatsoever, doing this like he did it everyday, when she could barely do a chin up and oh God. "Oh, God." Whimper.

"Mmmmm. No. I'm not God yet. But... I could get there." On the next downward motion, he buried his lips in her neck and sucked briefly, licking over her throat as he pushed back up. "Four." On the downward push for the fifth one, he pushed his hips into hers as his chest pressed down on hers as he pushed back up. "Five."

"Ah, ah!" Gasped as he sucked on her neck and she began to move with him, pushing up on his move down as her fingers threaded through his hair and held very, very tightly, fisting in it and bringing him down for a very hard kiss on his move down. Her free hand slipped down into his jeans which she deftly unbuttoned, reaching in and squeezing his cock, rubbing it against her on his move down and oh, yes, fuck, and good.

"Never... never tried it this way... in training," he whispered softly. "Fuck you feel good, though, baby. So good."

"Bad, bad, evil, bad!" She choked out, and yeah, because she was just evil like that, she left his very... very well endowed cock out and turned over onto her belly, her fingers grasping over his and raising up enough so that when he came down, he rubbed... right... there.

Whitney growled softly, and on his next downward push, he thrust his cock harshly against her ass. His bare skin rasped pleasurably on the fabric of her workout pants, and he shuddered, the motions changing from push-ups to thrusting.

"Supposed… to... leave!" She squealed, gasping and arching her back because she just wasn't the kind to sit back and take pleasure when she could give it, and she ground back against him on his pushing thrusts, throwing her head back and connecting with his shoulder as she gasped in pleasure.

His mouth found her ear as her head arched back against him, and he whispered into it. "We can leave anytime you want... I'm a big boy. I can.... hold it in."

"I can't." Half sobbed as she thrust back into him, and maybe she was being a slut, but she didn't care. It was quickly becoming an insecurity for her but she just couldn't think about that right now, undulating her hips back against him and squealing.

"Then we're gonna do this right." He stopped thrusting, just a minute, and flipped her over under him, so that she was lying on her back, and he was smiling down at her. "There. There's my baby girl." He stroked over her cheek carefully, then dipped his head to kiss her as he started thrusting against her again.

Ohhh yes, and she groaned softly, but the thought of being a slut, of acting like one, had the pleasure seeping out of her. She slowed her thrusting up… then stopped, completely, and the smile slid from her face.

Whitney stopped as she did, and he frowned as the smile disappeared. He sat up and straddled her waist, then when he didn't like that, he rolled off her entirely and snuggled her against his chest, arms around her waist. "Now, wanna tell me about it?"

Her eyes were filled with hot, hot tears, and she looked up at him in just... misery. "I'm a slut, Whitney."

"What?" His grip on her tightened. "Okay. Did Clark go all weird on us again? Did he say something you, baby? Who's ass am I gonna be kickin' tomorrow, cause nobody calls my woman a slut and gets away with it." He growled darkly as his arms tightened around her.

"No, I mean... I mean, in general." She shook her head, chin trembling as she looked up at him. "I don't deserve you. At all. I'm a slut. Lex, and now Shay. I'm just… I'm a slut."

"What?" Whitney shook his head. "No, are you kidding? You're not a slut, Chloe! At all!!"

"I was th-thinking about it today when w-we were working, and I am. I'm a slut. I hit on Lex all the t-time, and Shay, and I don't want you… you to think? That I don't love you. And th… the baby, the baby and I didn't help you, I didn't… I'm..." Her chin trembled hard with each hitched word and she bit her lip, hard.

"Okay. Chloe? I want you to listen to me. Carefully. Okay? You're not a slut. You're not. Hitting on Lex is like... hell, I don't know, hitting on your brother. Shayla? That's like hitting on your little sister. Because Chloe? The girl? Has the mentality of like, a twelve year old. She needs you, and you know, I dig that. You can help her grow up and know what she needs to know." He caught her face in his hands. "Don't worry about the baby. It didn't happen. So just... don't think about it, okay?" He used his thumb to stroke across her cheekbones.

"B... but... but I don't want you to think...because I love you. I w… want to marry you someday, I want to have babies with you, and puppies a-and a picket fence and you can't if you think you hate me." Her chin was dimpled and trembling with each word, voice breaking as she reached out and grabbed hard to him. "I don't have anyone but you."

"Ssssh." Whitney cradled her hard against his chest. "It's okay. I don't doubt it. Chloe, I know that you love me. I don't think you hate me; I don't hate you either. And I'm going to give you all that, puppies and picket fences and anything else you want. I promise you, I will."

"Sometimes I feel... feel, through whatever we h-have with Clark and Lex, that you don't think I do. That you think? I'm just joking around. You're a toy o-or something. Something. I don't want you to believe that, okay?" She muffled it into his chest, rubbing her tears away on the white shirt with a hard sniffle. "I'm sorry I'm being an idiot. I just haven't felt like myself since Mar-El died."

He kept stroking her hair. "It's not just you, Chloe. Okay? I feel like that with everybody. It doesn't stop me from loving you. And it doesn't stop me from believing that you love me. It's just... I've got whole issues with being fucked in the head with, that I don't even get into. So please... don't worry. We're solid, baby. Nothing's going to come between you and me."

"Even... even if Sh... Shay and I...?" She asked, voice hitching hard as she looked up at him, cupping his face with small hands.

"Even if you and Shay go to the Bahamas together and live in a lesbian commune. As long as you pack me a webcam, baby, I'm happy." He stroked her hair again. "Seriously. Even if you and Shay get it happening, that's okay. Because I know that I ain't got everything you need. No bad thing, cause I'm aware of it, and I want you to be happy."

"Y… you're everything I ne-need, everything." Sobbed now as the tears fell, grabbing him tightly and tugging him close. "Everything, e-everything, I hate h-hurting you, hate it, baby, I love you, love you so much."

"No, don't cry. Ssssh. Please, please, Chloe, don't cry." He held her tightly against him, pressing her face carefully into his broad shoulder. "Hush, baby, please. I love you too, I love you so much. You don't hurt me. Believe that, please, please. Don't cry. Believe me."

"I d-don't want you to think you're not ev-everything, everything to me, I don't want you to think I n-need to go somewhere else for love, I don't..." She grabbed him tighter, tugging him close as her fingers viced into his shirt in tight fists, holding close. "I don't want you t-to believe you're not b-beautiful to me, that you l-lack anything, oh God, you don't, you don't, baby, you're everything, so be-beautiful and lovely and wonderful, baby, oh, God."

Whitney just shook his head, unable to formulate what he knew about himself. "Chloe, you don't. I know you think I'm beautiful. I know it, every time I look at you I see it in your eyes." He held her tightly. "I know it, Chloe."

"You don't. You don't believe it." She let go enough to sit herself up, to get him up, and she just looked like a wreck but she didn't care. She cupped his cheeks, looking at him in half horror and half adoration, and gave him a soft shake. "You're wonderful. You're beautiful, you're loved. You're smart, y-you're intelligent, you're kind, you're g-giving, you're forgiving, you love, you have so much love it spills out. Lana was a bitch, a fucking b-bitch, to make you believe you aren't any of those things, when you are. You love me when I'm horrible to you, and I just... I love you, love you."

Whitney just shook his head softly. "I know you think that, and it's good enough for me." He hugged her gently, and put his cheek on her shoulder. "I love you, Chloe, because nobody else has ever treated me the way you do."

Oh, God. He didn't believe it, none of it, and she gazed at him in shock, shaking her own head as she brought him in tightly, arms tight around his neck as she squeezed him. "You're going to be a great daddy. Your'e going to have everything you ever wanted. You're so beautiful. I love you. I love you, so much."

"I love you, Chloe. You're the whole word to me." His hands ran gently through her hair. "I love you so much."

"I promise, I won't fuck anymore. With anyone but you. I swear it to you. Just you. And sometimes Clark and Lex, but that's weird and sha'nauch."

"No, Chloe, don't." He caught her head in his hands, made her look at him. "Do what you need to do to be happy, okay? I'll always be here."

"You make me happy. YOU." She gave him a shake, as hard as she could to his mountainous shoulders. "You."

"You make me happy too, Chloe. It kills me to see you sad. I don't care what it takes... I just always want you to smile."

She shook her head for a moment, hugging him again, before she snuffled and let out a soft sound... half laugh and half sob. "Come on. Lets go find Pete and Shay."

"Yeah. We've got some ass-kicking to do there. They left us in the house-building lurch."

"I love you, baby." She said softly, bringing his enormous fingers up for soft kisses as she stood. Things were not... resolved here, but she just didn't say any more, shaking her head softly. "God, I love you."

Whitney got up with her, and gave her a soft, beautiful smile as she kissed his fingertips. "I love you, Chloe. You're my life." He tugged in to his side and wrapped his arms around her, then picked up his jacket from the chair and tossed it over his shoulder. "Come on. You want me to drive?"

"Yeah. Give me time to fix my now gone mascara." She snuffled, hiding under his arm as they walked out of her room. "I meant it. No more fucking around."

"You don't need the mascara, baby. You're beautiful without out." He shrugged into his jacket as they went down the stairs, waiting for the blast of cool, rainy air from the door as soon as they opened it.

"Liar." She sniffled it softly, as she finished drying her face, and her fingers viced in his as she put her hood up over her hair. "I'm sorry I gave you blue balls."

"I'm not lyin', baby. You're beautiful to me." He kissed her lips softly. "And, I don't mind. Like I said. I'm a big boy, and I can hold it in until we're alone again."

"Will..." She blushed, hotly now, as they stood in the open doorway of her house. She'd taken the lights off on her way through, snapping the kitchen light off, the hallway, and looked back into her dark...and almost lonely house, before back up inquisitively. "Will you… take me... in the back?"

He cocked his head and looked down at her. "If that's what you want, then the answer is Yes, oh dear God, yes." A quick smile.

Her smile was blinding when it slid over her face, and more than just a little wet at the edges, but she sniffled it back, tightening her hand in his. "When... when Lex... I liked it. It hurt a little, but I liked it a lot."

"Will you... put something in yours too? While you're inside o… of me?" Swallow and a hot blush, as she looked out into the dark street, and got her big umbrella as the rain poured.

Whitney looked down at himself, and he couldn't help swelling just a little, in pride. "I think I'm a little bigger than Lex is, baby. I don't want to hurt you at all, are you sure?" His hands stroked carefully over her hips as they stood at the door.

"Lot bigger." She nodded it quickly, gazing up at him and nodding again. "A lot bigger. I'm sure of it. And I want... want to be full of you." Oh, and mmm, and uh huh. She swallowed and linked her fingers in his, smiling up at him as she rubbed her face on his shoulder.

"Then yes, I'll do it. Gladly, gladly will I do it." He grinned, and squeezed her hips gently in his hands. "And... to answer the other part of your question... no. I won't put it in. But... you will. You can pick... whatever you want... for me. Only thing is, you have to slid it inside." He kissed her neck, her ear, and then her cheek. "Okay?"

A deeply inhaled breath, and a little crooked grin up at him. "Okay. Uh huh. Oh. Oh, so okay its SO okay." She snagged his fingers tightly around her waist and slipped her fingers in his jeans pocket, grabbing the car keys and handing them over to him, all the while watching the storm. "Run for it?"

Whitney shook his head. "No way. You wait here. I'll bring the car up to the sidewalk, and then you won't have that far to go."

At that her teeth flashed and she snagged his hand, using her body weight to propel him out into the splashing rain, and she let out a laughing cry as the cold water hit her, squealing and running through the puddles to the car in all of her hot pink.

Whitney bellowed once as the water hit him but he ran, keys in his hand and aimed towards the truck so that the locks were popped by the time they got there. He jerked Chloe's door open first, waiting to help propel her inside. "Move it, baby!"

She let out a squeal of cold as she lifted her head to look at him, getting splashed in the face for it as she jumped into the car and shooed him, "Hurry, get in!" As she closed the door behind her with a smack, letting out giggles as she pushed her sopping wet hair from her eyes.

Whitney ran around the front of the truck and jumped into the driver's seat, water running in rivulets from his hair and down the creases in his leather jacket. "Motherfucker that's cold!" He giggled as he shook his head like a wet dog and cranked up the truck. "Let's get the heat goin', whaddya say?"

"I think my panties are wet." Chloe giggled back, pushing her hood back from her hair and grinning up at him from a wet face. Her jacket was splotchy and soaked, shoes muddy... nipples, without a bra to keep them pressed close and in, piercing her jacket front as she leaned back, shivering and rubbing her hands in front of the heat as she pulled her seat belt on.

"If I were wearing panties? I know mine would be wet." Whitney leaned over, and licked one of his girlfriend's hard, cold nipples. "And I don't just mean from the rain, beautiful."

She just grinned, tip of her tongue caught between her teeth as he leaned down to lick, bringing his face closer to her as she kissed his shower damp, and now rain damp, hair, encouraging another lick. "Would they now?"

"Oh yeah." Whitney moved and licked the other one, favoring them both and nibbling on each before he sat back up. "Already... a little damp." He unzipped his jeans just enough to take Chloe's hands and rub over the slightly moist patch on his underwear where his precome was starting to leak through. "Getting wetter."

Her breath caught and trembled, and she rubbed softly as her eyelashes fell to half mast, catching her lip now as she rubbed... rubbed her thumb across the hard head, and sighed softly. "I like the thought of you in panties."

"Do you now?" He cranked the truck around her hand, grunting darkly as her thumb stroked across the head of his cock. "Why... do you think I wore them... to the party for you? To make you... wet for me." He arched his head back against the head rest before opening his eyes, straightening up and putting the vehicle in gear.

"A lot. I like it a lot. I l... loved when you let me inside you." She said softly, leaning down across the long seat of the truck, the seat belt stretching with her as she mouthed the head of his cock softly, her fingertips moving to stroke raised balls softly. "I loved when you cried my name when I was making love to you."

"I loved it too." Whitney was gripping the wheel in tight hands. "I loved having you inside me like that... knowing it was you stroking inside me, touching me and stroking my dick, fuck. So beautiful. So good." One hand moved from the wheel to wrap gently around her wrist.

"Is it okay? If... if I?" She asked softly, looking up at him as her fingertips stroked softly over his half uncovered cock.

He nodded. "God, I hope so." He gave a wry grin. "Please, please do. Your mouth or your hands, they're both beautiful and hot."

She smiled it and kissed his belly button softly, giving it a soft kiss before she brought her mouth back down, licking softly and experimentally over the head of his begging erection. His cock was... so beautifully shaped, and she kissed gently as she used what Lex had taught her and brought him down her throat. Just once, her eyes closed tightly, before she came up and snuggled in beside him, her fingers replacing her mouth as she stroked him softly. "I've never given you a hand job." She murmured as she pushed her palm up and down, bringing his own hand down to direct her.

Whitney moaned softly, and wrapped his fingers through hers, stroking his cock slowly at first. "Had this... this fantasy once. You and me... in my truck. Like after our date. Only not, cause we were dressed up like, super nice. And you did... fuck, yes, just like that. Just what you're doing right now."

"The first and only?" She giggled it as she stroked up and down, softly, leaning down to cover his cock with her mouth again, moisten it and his fingers with her tongue, before stroking again, more firmly, as she lay her face close to his and licked and nipped. "I was way shyer then. Not now. Okay, not all the time now. I love how you feel in my hands, like soft skin and just....its beautiful."

"Oh, God." Whitney shivered, keeping his eyes on the road. "Fuck... didn't realize... so much shit happened... was our only date. We need... a real date, baby. You and me. Give you that soon." He grunted again, raising his hips up into her hand as he drove with slightly blurry eyes.

"Don't need dates to love you. Happened all on its own." Chloe murmured, bringing her fingers down tighter over him, over and over and over, stroking as she kissed and licked his ear softly, going down to her neck. Didn't know how lewd she looked, her palm down, disappearing over his hip... didn't think of it, until she brought her own down and under the drawstring waistband of her own, nipples peaking all over again.

"Holy fuck." Whitney closed his eyes and slammed on the brakes at the stop light, growling as he licked her neck. "You're so hot, baby." Touching herself at the same time she was touching him was unbelievably, scorchingly, HOT.

She bit her lip as she arched to his ferocious lick, her fingers working over her clit tight. Nothing inside, couldn't reach, but she rubbed herself in such pleasure, licking her lower lip as her thumb trembled over the tip of his cock, stroking faster as she touched herself. GOD she wished she had three arms. She wanted her nipples pinched and....

She reached down, angled her head, and gave one a hard suck, whimpering in her throat.

"Fuck." Whitney floored the pedal as soon as the light turned green, and then pulled into the first empty parking lot that he could find. He parked the car, nearly wrenching the gear shift out of it's socket in his eagerness, and he half-turned in the seat, his mouth sliding down to bite one nipple through the thin, soaked shirt as his fingers roughly tugged the other one, pacifying it until he could get his mouth to it. His hips thrust into her stroking hand, and he shivered as he smelled both their scents mingling in the cab.

Oh, Yes and she whimpered, loudly, laying back on the seat of the truck and spreading her thighs to bring him in, her fingers still stroking over her clit and rubbing, fast and hard, because she wanted now. Her fingers were hard on his cock, fast, and she just didn't have enough hands because she was not letting go. She thrust her palm up and down his quaking member, jerking in her fingers, hot and hard, her own clit burning as she rubbed in her pleasure.

Whitney had a single free hand and he slid it inside of her pants, over her own fingers and nudging them out of the way as his larger, rougher digits slid inside her to stroke, thumb rolling over her clit and pressing it against his palm as he sucked her nipples, cock pounding into her hand as he was so close to the edge.

"Oh, GOD!" She cried, arching up into his hand as she stroked harder, her now free palm going to stroke over his tense balls. She cupped and squeezed once before she brought her fingers to his nipples, pinching them tightly in her fingers and rolling them as she arched and thrust into his...thick fingers and oh god. Her thumb rubbed the slit hard as her palm came up on his dick, and then squeezed her fingers around him on the way down.

That was all it took; Whitney grunted hard, teeth sinking into her shoulder as he came, spilling wet heat all over her hand. His body shuddered as his fingers stroked steadily and firmly into Chloe's sheath, rubbing her clit with his thumb, fingers filling her and rubbing against her walls as he moved his lips safely back down to her nipples, sucking each into his mouth.

She let out a sob of want as she squeezed and thrust down him, letting him come as her hips bucked up, begging for orgasm as she shut her eyes tightly, squeezing as she finally let him go and let her hand fall free, waiting to be licked clean as she groaned, her clean palm squeezing in his hair, fisting as she whimpered.

Whitney's other hand moved, pulling her pants down just enough so that he could drop his head and slide his tongue into her dripping slit. Quick laps up the wet lips, cleaning all the moisture that he could taste, then sliding his tongue between them to push into her opening. "Come for me, baby, please," he murmured against her clit, catching it in his lips.

Ah! AH! AH! "Uh! Uh!" She gasped, thrusting up into his mouth as her head fell back, working her hips against her mouth and... came. She let out a cry, her thighs tightening around his ears as she arched and came, gasping in shocking pleasure as she grasped his hair hard, tightening with her orgasm. She mewled in lovely pleasure, body relaxing a moment later, and dropped down into a gooey heap of trembling gasps.

Whitney left his mouth on her as she came, devouring the slick liquid as quickly as it dampened his cheeks, mouth, and chin. He licked himself clean, then purred softly over her as he started licking her clean.

"Oh, God." She whispered as she looked down at him, groaning as he licked there, between her thighs and uh, God. She brought her palm to her mouth, licking too, licking his orgasm free as she offered it to him and pulled him up just a little to lick her own from his cheeks.

"We're going to be late," he muttered as she licked him.

"Muhrpmh." She whispered back, letting one leg fall off where she'd propped it up on his back, and gave a trembling little sigh.

"Or we could... you know, sleep here all night." He snuggled up close to her.

"Mmmm. Pete. Shay. Claark." Ohhh. Stirring of something and her eyes danced, as she looked up at him and taunted, "Claarrrk. Lleeeeexxxx."

"...can go fuck themselves."

-fin-

go on to the next part