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The Memoirs

Smallville fanfic by Kel and Diana

Chapter 171: Great Start, No Follow-Through

Pete had Pink stuck in his head. The why's, how's, and for what reasons eluded him, other than the fact that his girlfriend had had pink hair up till yesterday, she was grungy punk like the artist, and she could sing like an angel--okay, so maybe he *did* now how it got stuck in his head.

Damn.

Dick had called him at almost eight, and it had been by the skin of his teeth and a really great lie to his dad that he'd gotten out of the house. He'd picked up a pizza and a case of beer with his nifty fake ID, and was climbing the steps to the hallway where Bruce and Dick had their bedroom.

It was weird being in there, and he only had been, once before, when he'd been looking for his friend. Very... very strange, and he knocked quietly on the oaken door as he waited.

Dick looked over at Bruce as he swung himself out of bed. They were both dressed, but they'd been cuddling on the bed together until the knock on the door, and Dick picked up his crutches. "Hang on." He slowly hobbled to the door, and opened it. "Come on in, Pete." A couple of careful backward steps, and he was hobbling back towards the bed again. "I'm glad you could get here."

Bruce had quickly sat up, and was rubbing his fingers through his hair to get the fluffiness he loathed in proper order. Wearing comfortable slacks and a polo shirt, he climbed up to his feet, pressing a quick kiss to his lovers temple as he did it. "You guys have fun. Theirs more room in the study and a bigger TV, if you need it." In two words, get out of my bedroom. He kissed dick again, softly, gave Pete the mandatory nod, and slipped off, to go find Lex.

"Hey, man," Pete watched Bruce leave before turning back to his friend, eyebrow up. "If you guys're busy.."

"No, we're not busy. Bruce just wants us out of the bedroom; he'll live with the fact that my hobbled-up ass ain't goin' anywhere." He dropped back on the bed, and nodded to the chair beside it. "Pull up a pew, Petey. We need to talk."

A smile came and went at the pew comment, and he set the food and the case of beer on a table top by the second door which had to lead into the study. tugged the big chair out from its spot and over to the bed, not so sure he was liking where this was going, even as he sat in it and looked at him a little nervously. "Sure, okay. Everything going alright?"

"Yeah. It's going great. Pete... I didn't want to leave this till the last minute, but I ain't exactly been in the shape to go visitin' and tell everybody this; Clark and Lex know, cause they live here, but... we're leaving. This morning, about four, four-thirty."

"I...I know." He said it, softly, and his throat bobbed quietly. "You told me, on Friday when I came to see you. I just...thought it'd be later in the day." Stay brave, Ross. "Excited about getting home?"

"I did, too, which is why I didn't rush things. Didn't find out until earlier today how early it was going to be." He leaned forward slightly. "Yeah. Yeah, I am excited to get home. I can't wait to get back." He ran his hand through his hair, and light glinted off his ring. "There's something else, though."

Pete saw it.

His stomach dropped, heavily. Gut reaction, nothing he could do about it, as a fist tightened at the pit of his belly and squeezed like a vice. He swallowed the burning heat in his throat and let out a sound of joy for his friend, as he reached out for his hand. "Hey! Heeey! He finally popped the question, didn't he? Bastard, took him long enough." Smile for his friend, despite his reaction, he was genuinely happy for him. Even if it killed him. "This is so great!"

Dick was surprised at first, then realized what Pete was talking about and had seen, and held his hand out. "Yeah, he just asked tonight. I said yes." Soft admission.

"I'm so happy for you!" He reached forward and gave him a brief, but tight, hug. "Good for you, man, that's so fucking awesome. Was he all romantic about it, or did he just sort of ask it?"

Dick returned the hug, and then looked down at his hands. "He was romantic, but it was a very sudden thing. Just... was laying here, talking about leaving, and all of a sudden he slides the ring on and asks if I want to marry him."

"Bruce comes off like that, real sudden, spur uh the moment typa guy." But Pete smiled, even as his belly surged. "Are you happy?"

"He is. And yeah, man. I'm happy. It's just another reason that I'm happy to get back to Gotham."

"When ya'll get ready to tie the knot, you better invite me man." Another smile at him. "Why you lookin' all death and mayhem over it?" He lowered his voice an octave. "Got something to tell you, Pete. The skin's gonna peel off your face, and you're gonna run around in circles screaming."."

Dick gave Pete a grin, and he sat back again. "You'll be at the top of the list, right after Lex. I just... wasn't sure how you'd take it, man. That's all. Didn't wanna hurt you anymore than I already have."

"Naw, man, don't even worry about it." Pete smiled at him and sprawled back in the chair too. "I'm cool with it. Happy for you, cause you deserve to be happy." But he snickered. "Damn right I wanna come. And hey, dude, you better put Clark up there with Lex, you know how he gets. Dude, I tell you what they did the other day?"

"Clark is with Lex; they're like, one entity. Clex, or something." A snicker. "Oh, I heard, all right. Got themselves stuck on the ceiling."

"Man, stuck on the fucking ceiling. Couldn't get down. Shay and I had to get up there with pool cues and my shoe in some like, fucking come, and get them to the book case so Lex could get down. Heavier than he looks, by the way." But he could barely speak through the laughter. "Shay was like a little hen, trying to conduct shit."

"That's what the girl's good for. Bossin' around, gettin' shirt organized, worryin' about everybody." Then he smiled. "You take good care of her, Pete... she's a good kid, for all that she's still a kid. She's not old, not like you and me."

"No, she ain't." He agreed it, quietly. "No, man, she's still young. Got this innocence about her, that no matter what, she'll always have. I love that about her. Makes me feel like I'm a kid again, y'know?" He tipped his head at him. "Forgave me. Took me back, loves me still. Takes a strong, resilient girl like her to do something like that, man. Don't deserve her at all, but she's got it in her head that she loves me." He rubbed a hand over his head.

"Yeah, I know." Dick leaned forward again, bringing himself face to face with Pete. "She does love you. Don't let that go. You deserve to be loved, Pete, by someone like her, who can love you with everything they got."

His lips curved, a little. "I didn't start loving her, till recently." He tipped his head. "That makes me an asshole, and a hypocrite. And its still not all the love it can be... but it excites me, cause I know if we work at it, we can get there. Y'know?"

Dick shook his head. "I seen you two. You loved her more'n you think, Pete. Don't write it off."

"Maybe. Whenever I get near her, its like every love song I ever heard plays in my head, and everything around her kinda whitens out, you know? Man, she's gonna do the dance competition this year with me. Ain't got no clue what her little white girl ass is gonna be able to dance to, been wracking my brain. Can't do no Latin flavor, or hip hop. Know what I was thinking? Don't laugh."

"Won't laugh. Give."

"Bout five years ago, Whitney Houston made her song... that one, I Will Always Love You? Into a dance mix. Its really nice, Chloe's got it. Every time I think about dancing with Shay, I think about that song. Keeps coming into my head, man."

Dick thought. "Then that's what you oughta do, man. Work out the steps, and show 'em to her. Girl can't be all bad; she's got a mean swing of a ball bat." He rubbed the back of his head ruefully.

Pete's lips quirked, and spread. That they could joke about it made his pained heart a little lighter, and he rolled his eyes with amusement. "Yeah, man. She came over on Saturday while I was getting my dancing groove on, and showed her a few of the steps. She's a natural for it, man. Had all the steps I showed her down in twenty minutes."

"Okay. Then it sounds like you got your song and your partner. When is this competition, man? I'll drag Bruce down for it. We'll sit in the crowd and root for you."

His lips spread. "May. May thirtieth, actually. Day after Whitney's graduation, he and Chloe and the Clex," Cause damn that had amused him. "Are gonna come see us. Shay don't know that yet, 'course."

"Don't tell her yet. Mark me and Bruce down too; I'll drag his ass back here and he'll whine and bitch and moan but he'll be glad to hang with Lex."

"Dorks." But he snickered. "Alright man. Just don't tell Shay. She knows she's performing in front of more'n my family, she'll die." But he shifted, and smiled at him. "I'm real happy for you, you know."

"Ain't gonna say a word." He leaned back in bed, and propped his cast back on the edge of the bed. "I'm happy for me too."

"And a modest bastard, aren't you?"

"Hey, I'm master of the fuckin' universe, and don't you forget it."

"Course you are." Snort, though he was thrumming lightly, shifting in his seat and tapping his foot. He was considering the steps in his head as the music ran through it, and it was making him jumpy, full of movement. "Man. Oh man."

Dick saw the foot tapping. "Go on. Get out of here, go grab your girl and get to work. I see your foot movin'."

His lips spread. "Its ten. Think she'll mind?"

"Nah. And if she does, wake her ass up anyway." Another grin. "She won't mind."

He let out a wicked chuckle and motioned towards the pizza and beer... before pausing for a moment, half out of his seat, and reached forward, to embrace his friend. Tightly, tightly, squeezing him hard and hugging him as closely to him as he could, pressing his lips to Dick's cheek for a tender, chaste kiss. "I love you, huh? Stay safe, man. Got my email, 'spect you to be writing me man. Gimmie a ring when ya'll get home, tell me you made it safe, alright?"

Dick returned the hug as tightly as he could. "I love you, man. I'll call you when we get back, and I promise, you'll hear from me every day. Bitchin' about school and the night job both."

"Good. Take care of yourself." Another tight squeeze and he had to go before he did something stupid, like cry, and lay another kiss to his cheek before Pete left. Closed the door quietly behind him, and blinked as he saw Bruce just coming down the hall, lowering his eyes and clearing his throat softly as he walked past him. Down the hall, and then through the secret corridor. Pushed the door open to the second hall, went down for doors to the one crusted in total pink, and opened it without knocking. "Shay?"

Shayla was hanging off her bed, feet kicking as her head and shoulders were buried under the foot as she rooted for something. "PETE?" she yelled, but it was muffled by the bed, the mattress, and all the crap shoved under it. "Come on in."

Yeah, like he'd say no to that. He crawled over the bed and bit her pantied ass hard, giving it another bite on the other cheek before he fell over the bed, feet kicking as he rooted with her. "What're we looking for?" Loud whisper, as the blood rushed to his head.

"OWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!" She screamed it as her head caromed off the metal underpinning of the bed, and her foot tried to kick out. "I'm looking for my graphing calculator. I unpacked it with all the shit Graham brought from Vancouver, and I think I stuck it under here, but now I can't find it!"

Her cry of pain had him cracking the hell up, and his palm came up to massage her sore bum none too innocently as he pulled out a box filled with fluffy feathery pens that made him sneeze, pushing it to the side as he took out... four Kit and Caboodle sparkly boxes packed full of makeup. He did a roll and thudded on the ground on his butt, staring at the boxes and opening one experimentally. "...the fuck? How much makeup do you need?"

"Three cases. The last one is just nail polish. And there's about sixteen shades of pink that I'm missing, so don't laugh." She wiggled her ass against his hand, and pulled her head out for a second. "God this is giving me a head rush."

He had a purely wicked expression on his face. "Reee-eeaaallyy." Raised brow of amusement as he smiled, quite handsomely, at her. "Do you think you'd like to take a moment from looking for graphic calculators to make out with me?"

"Huh? Oh. Yeah. easy." She pulled herself the rest of the way out, and then grunted. "Uh. You mentioned making out?"

"Me? Making out? When did I mention that?" But his eyes were dancing. "What do you think about dancing to Whitney Houston for the competition, Shay?" He smiled, eyes dancing. "Either I Will Always Love You, or My Love Is Your Love." He sang a few bars from it. "If I lose my fame and foorttunnee... and I'm homeless on the street. And I'm sleeping in Grand Central Station… its okay, if you're sleeping with me."

She clapped a hand to the side of her head as she sat up and all the blood rushed back out of her head again, and she looked up at him. "Oooh, I like them both, actually. Um... you pick. You're the expert, I just work here." She crawled across the bed and snuggled in against him.

He brought his arms around her and smiled, tugging her down onto the floor with him as he pulled her tiny little body into his lap. "I love you, Shayla. Just thought you should know." he pressed his lips to hers, her cheek, her chin and jaw.

Shayla oomphed softly as she rolled onto his lap, and tightened her arms around his neck. "I love you too, Pete." She giggled softly as she wiggled again, getting comfortable against him and giving him soft kisses back. "You want... to spend the night?" she asked between soft kisses. "Won't... ask for anything... just want to wake up together?"

His lips spread, curved as he held her close to his chest, fingers stroking her hip and back gently as he leaned back against the wall and held her close to him. "Yes. I'd... I'd like that, Shay. I'd... I don't know if I'm ready for... you know. But I'd like... to make you feel good. Will you let me?"

She looked at him squarely, then shook her head. "No. But listen to me. Not because I don't want you to. Because I do. Believe me. But... no. It's too much like the way we started out before, and I don't want that again. I don't want pieces of you, Pete. I'm willing to wait until I can have all of you, and we can come together as two whole people."

He'd been kind of shocked to have her tell her no so point blankly, but understood, when she finished, why she said it. Like it was before was... no good, and he swallowed, hard, as he nodded and stroked her hair softly. "Okay. I understand." His lips brushed her hair softly, as he tugged her gently close. "Okay. Shay… thank you."

Shayla leaned her head against his shoulder. "You're welcome, baby. Not sure for what, but you're welcome."

"Cause you're saying no." His throat bobbed. "Cause you don't mind waiting for my idiot ass to be ready for sex again." He swallowed softly, and pressed his lips to her face again, her throat, her cheek, her jaw. "I might be. Tonight. For... touching. I haven't stopped thinking about it, and you, all day."

"If you are, then you are. If you're not, then don't rush it. I'm serious, when I say that I'm all right with waiting." She raised her hand and stroked it over his face and his shoulder, his neck and down his chest. "You don't have to rush back into anything. Not for me."

"No... I've got to cause..." He swallowed, hard. "Cause I've got probably the worst case of blue balls ever."

Shayla laughed softly, at that. "Come on, then. Let me up, let me lock the door... then we'll see."

"Yeah?" Excitement trailed into his blood as he pulled Shayla up into his arms, cause she was light as the breeze, holding her in his arms as he lay her quietly on her slightly mussed bed. "I'll lock it. Are you sure?"

"Yeah, I'm sure. I'm positive." She leaned forward as he laid her down, and sucked a little kiss from his neck. "The key's on my dresser."

"Ooohhhh." He wriggled his brows. "That kind of locking. Heee." He kissed her cheek softly and rose up from the bed, hoping over another little pink and purple box filled with girly stuff, and took the key from the nightmare of a dresser. He turned it and left it in the keyhole, so they wouldn't do something unfortunate like have Graham barge in again, and he turned back to her… nervously, and excitedly. Okay. Yes. Hadn't been really counting on this, but it was definitely brightening his night, as he toed out of his shoes and sat on the edge of the bed. "Guess what?"

"Yes, that kind of locking. With keys and everything. It makes a statement to older brothers, other siblings, and the help. The statement is... stay the fuck outta my room, bitch." She snickered. "What?"

"Bruce proposed to Dick tonight."

"Holy shit."

His grin spread across his face. "Yeah, holy shit." he dropped his left sneaker after getting the knot in the laces undone, and crawled up on the bed with her, plopping on her pillow comfortably. "And Dick said yes."

Shayla plopped beside him, face to face, and used her leg to hook one of his and tucked it between her thighs. "Wow. At least Dickhead'll be off the market now."

"Married couple. Isn't that weird? I'm waiting for the day that Lex and Clark announce their engagement." He stroked her face, gently... then let his hand stroke down, carefully and quietly, to her breast. He cupped it carefully in his hand, swallowing as he felt no constricting bra, and looked into her eyes.

She didn't break eye contact, just scooted a little closer to him. "Yeah, I'm just waitin' for that day myself. Talk about your damned media circuses. I'm takin' bets on how long it is before AJ kills somebody for leakin' it out." She shifted so that her shirt rose up, just a little bit, baring her stomach and letting her see the touch of his hand on her body.

He let out a long, slow breath, and made a quiet sound mid way through it as he cleared his throat quietly and stroked the same hand on her shirt under it. Her skin was hot, warm, her nipple sliding over his fingers before centering in the palm of his hand, and he stroked very, very tenderly, squeezing softly as they talked. "He'll have to kill someone for trying to come in the middle of the Clex."

She giggled, and it caused her breast to jiggle slightly in his hand, rubbing the nipple against his palm as it moved. "The Clex???"

Oh man, Pete smiled. "Yeah. Dick christened them. He was talking about how he was gonna invite Lex to the wedding first, then me, and I was all, "What about Clark?" And he was like, "They're a single entity. The Clex." Which, you know, cracked me the fuck up.'

Shayla giggled again. "I fuckin' hate agreein' with Dickhead on anything, but that's funny as hell. Pete, man, we gotta keep usin' that. We have gotta keep it alive."

"Definitely. Lex is gonna hit the roof when he hears it." Pete murmured quietly, as he ducked his head down and brought her nipple between his lips through her shirt, the hand under it squeezing the firm breast tenderly as he sucked through cotton.

Shayla's fingers slipped over Pete's head, stroking the little curls that hugged his head tightly, and arched her back. "So'll Clark--until he realizes how--oh--how cute it is."

"Mmm." Didn't have much he could talk about right now, when his mouth took more of her breast in, and they were just small enough, pert enough, for him, so he could suck at it deeply, deep before out to the peak. Her shirt was damp with his saliva but he could have literally cared less, tongue lapping at the peak as his cock began to stir in his pants. "Cute, so cute, not as cute as you."

"M'not cute," she said breathlessly, sliding her hand down to stroke his bicep. "I'm pretty... beautiful... just okay... just not cute. Cute... is for baby ducks." She said it between little pants, as each tug of her nipple caused something else to tug between her legs.

"You're my baby duck. My pixie." He murmured, and brought her other breast, neglected until now, in his mouth. Had to turn her the slightest bit to do it, but he left her shirt on. The better for the damp cotton to scrape across the now tender nub, as he began the same to the other. Filling his mouth, lapping at the tip before bringing more of her breast into his mouth.

"Pixie... I can live with." She shivered as he changed, feeling the cooler air, as compared to his mouth, causing her nipple to harden further, scraping and rubbing against her shirt. She couldn't stand it, and eased her hand under it, rolling the little tip between her fingers. "Oh."

"No... don't touch. Like you...squirming for me." Pete whispered softly, tugging her fingers gently from underneath it as he sucked it again, to dampen it once more, and went back to the nipple he'd been working on. He brought it back into his mouth, sucking at the cotton and his prize under it, palm coming under her shirt to squeeze the little breast and bring it out further, for him to suck more on it.

Shayla nodded. "Oh--kay," she whimpered, and slid her hand out from under her shirt, arching her back to rub the peak across her shirt as Pete took more of her other breast into her mouth. The pull between her legs was turning into a small ache, but she didn't say a word, just rubbed her legs together as he suckled her. "P-Pete-feels so good."

"Taste like honey." He whispered back, giving it a last loving suck before he looked up at her, eyes dancing. "Tell me how much it feels good." He knew. He wasn't dumb. His fingers came down, tentatively and slowly so he wouldn't scare her, and cupped the valley of her hips tightly, heal of his hand settling against her clit with only cotton panties separating them, and began to rock and rub.

"Oh, Christ. It feels good. So hot... want you to touch me." Her legs opened a little further as she rolled, lifting her hips slightly to rub her clit against his hand. "I've been touching myself there... I've missed your hands on me."

"Missed you, baby." he whispered, ever so tenderly, as he rocked and rubbed. He was hard, raging hard, his cock tense and lying against his lower belly, and the feeling of being able to achieve an erection just... it made him smile, broadly, as his mouth came down to replace his hands.

Yeah. He wanted this, worse than anything.

The taste of her, like the honey of her breasts, exploded into his mouth as he lapped over her panties, licking over and over where he knew her clit was. He hooked his thumbs through the sides of her panties and tugged down, down gently over her creamy, pale thighs, and spread them gently as he licked between them. The taste and scent burst through his body like a rocket, bright as the morning sun, and he began to lick and lap gently, fingers of one hand stroking over her lips and folds as he did so.

She arched up, crying out softly as her nails dug into his shoulders. She was so torn; part of her wanted to just take this sweet pleasure and let it course through her body, but another part of her moved away, put her hands on Pete's shoulders and made him look up at her, as his chin rested on his stomach. "Pete... are you... tell me you're okay? You're okay with this, you're not just doing this for me."

He swallowed, her excretions already on his lips and lower face, and he looked up, eyes half drugged, to stare at her. "Wh… what? Oh… yes, no, doing it for us both, Shay." His fingers slid easily inside of her as she made him look at her, twining together and sliding in deep as he stroked up over her g-spot.

Harsh outcry as he rubbed over her, back arching and opening her body to him. "O-okay!" Her feet were flat on the bed, knees bent and hips raised as she moved again, urging his mouth back down to her. "Please."

He grinned at her, shyly, and ducked back down, holding her hips with his free hand as he dove. His mouth covered her and he sucked, hard, licking and lapping at her clit... then down, to where his fingers were dripping, and he slid them out and drove his tongue into her easily. His wet fingers slid down and one slipped into her back entrance, all the way to the last knuckle and crooked, so that his tongue could lap over it. Over and over, as his finger began to stroke in and out, mouth busily working her to orgasm.

Squeal of absolute pleasure as his finger slid into her backside, and she squeezed down, rubbing her ass against the quilt as he lapped at her. Her hands gripped his wrists tightly as her head fell back, arching as she pushed her lower body down onto his mouth.

At the loud sound above him he slipped his finger out and slid it in again, accompanied by a second one. He squeezed them together and slipped it, tongue lapping inside of her… then coming out and up to her clit, which he caught to give little nibbles and tender kisses to. He sucked at it, lapped all around it as his fingers thrust.

Harder squeals, tighter grip on his fingers with her muscles, and Shayla's fingers drops from Pete's hands to the sheets, clawing them as she rocks her hips, thrusting them forward, rubbing against his face. The sucks and kisses to her clit are nothing but shots of pure fire that burn through her groin, all the way to her brain. "Pe--Pete, so close, please, so close."

"Close baby, close." He whispered into her folds, as he began to fuck her with his fingers. In and out, quick, hard, his cock burning and boiling as he moved inside of her. His tongue returned back to her entrance, sliding inside....then looked up once before sliding his fingers free of her back entrance, and slid his tongue inside of it instead. All the way, deep as he could, biting around the rim as his clean thumb came up to her clit and rubbed in quick, hot strokes.

"PETE!!" Her hips thrust forward faster, rubbing her lower back against the blanket, hands twisted in the sheets as she came. Couldn't stop it, couldn't hold it back, just came. Body tense, slit pouring her juices out all over his mouth, his fingers, and the bed.

He let out his own cry into her little hole as she came, and he moaned, hard, thrusting deep as her body exploded. Shaking, shuddering, he worked her through her orgasm, feeling her trembles shake as he held her legs and ass close to his face and body, sucking and biting as he rubbed her clit hard to get her through the delicious climax.

She shuddered, whimpering as he wrung every bit of orgasm out of her body, closing her legs around his hips and pulling him up, just a little. "What... what can I do... for you?" she gasped out softly, letting go of the sheets enough to rub her palm over his chest.

"Lemme clean up, first." He murmured, softly, as he pressed a kiss to her belly and chest tenderly. "I love you. Did it feel good?"

"It felt... god, so good." But she tugged him back down again. "Don't... don't clean up. Just... tell me."

His cheeks flushed, softly. "W...whatever you want to." A hard nod, his throat bobbing quietly. "Whatever you want to, Shay." Another rumbling kiss to her chest, underneath her breasts, then each peak, as he lifted the edge of his shirt and wiped her face, his mouth, though he needed to brush his teeth before he kissed her mouth. He just tugged his shirt up and let it drop beside them, as he kept kissing her body, all over, licking up the little rivulets.

Shayla shoved his shirt out of the way and kissed him, didn't let him move, just kissed him. Licked his lips, cleaning herself from his face, sucking a deep kiss from him as she slid down his body.

Quiet groan as her lips wrapped around his, and his fingernails stroked down her back even as he let her. If she wanted to she could, and he lay back against her blankets as he groaned, quietly. "Shay... don't... don't have to...if...uh, God," Her body dragged against his crotch and he began to count backwards from a thousand.

"I want to," she said quietly, and moved her mouth down, licking over his navel, scraping her teeth over his abs, and lapping gently at the definition. "I want to. Can I? Will you let me?"

"Yes, okay, yes please, please." Hard as stone in his pants, so hard he could barely stand it. "Please, yes, yes, oh, please, only I-if you want to, if... uh, God," Babbling like an idiot and did he ever not give a shit, hips humping upwards as he begged. Her teeth were driving him nuts, and it took everything in him not to roll her over and fuck her blind. Not ready to fuck, and if he started it and lost his erection he'd never forgive himself. "Please, shay, Shay, oh, Christ almighty."

"I want to," she reassured him again, and then positioned herself over his crotch, opening her mouth and sliding his length down her throat. Slowly, sucking lightly, tongue licking along the shaft, moving carefully so she didn't make a fool out of herself, hands braced on his thighs, fingertips barely tickling his balls.

He gasped, hard, and looked down.

Shayla. With his cock. Down her throat.

His eyes widened and he let out a cry of horror, of pleasure, of ache, of joy, as she sucked him. He bit his fist hard and let out another wail, hard and blinding, come out of him. Oh "GOD!"

He had to fist his hands in the bed spread so he wouldn't shake her free and jack himself off as hard as he could. Aroused, so incredibly aroused, fire lighting all over his body as he shuddered and ached. "B-Baby, baby! SHAY!"

Her hands held tightly to his thighs as she slid all the way down, then slowly slid back up to wrap her fist around his shaft and jack him once. "I've been working on it," she whispered. "Working on the gag reflex. Been wanting to do this for you." She slid back down then, slowly as before, until he was all the way in her throat again, and she started to move. Each time, sucking up the shaft then sliding back down to suck the base, fingers rolling his balls.

His head thrashed until he could bring her pillow to the side of his head, and he turned his head to bite it, hard. Oh. Good Christ and Jesus, almighty, he could barely stand what she was doing, what he was seeing, and he looked down at her, surrendering his mouthful to stroke his fingers through her hair and moan.

She loved the moan. She knew she couldn't speed up, not too much, not yet, so she slowly slid him out of her throat but kept him in her mouth, sucking as much of him as she could her head started to move faster, and she stroked under his balls, rubbing the thin skin between them, rubbing the little pathway from balls to rear opening, just as he'd teased the same patch of skin on her. But then, afraid to do anything of the things she'd read about, she moved back, completely away as she slid him gently back in her throat, sucking hard to make up for anything she might have done to upset him.

It had scared him. Deeply. When he felt her moving back to the back he'd frozen, and now, as she moved away, he slowly began to relax again. He'd lost some of the tense hardness in his cock, and he swallowed hard, closing his eyes so he wouldn't cry, second time tonight that he'd forced it back down. His throat bobbed tightly as he looked at her, begging her forgiveness with his eyes as he fought to stay hard, watched her breasts rub against his thighs, watched her mouth going over him. "Sorry, baby."

She felt him soften just enough, and let him go, instantly contrite as she slid up his body, hand wrapping around his cock as she moved back up. "No, it's okay, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have, I'm sorry, I didn't think, I just wanted you to feel good, I'm sorry." She kissed his chest, his shoulders, his throat, and up to his mouth. "I'm sorry, it's okay, I'm sorry."

His throat bobbed again, hard, working the ball of tears down as he lost his erection completely, and pressed his lips tightly together as he wound his arms around her and buried his face in her shoulder. Didn't move, didn't say a word, just staying like that as he found his emotions like hell, fighting not to explode into tears, his fingers stroking over her back slowly and softly as he held her. "Not you, Shay. Not you."

"Ssssh... it's okay. It's my fault, I'm sorry." She kissed his ear, his throat, stroking his back as he held tightly to her. "It was me, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to--I just... wanted you to feel good. I should have known." She squeezed him tightly. "It's okay."

"I know, I know you did, I know. I just… I know. I know, baby. You were doing good, so good, all the way in, so good. Not you, you're wonderful, not y-you, I'm s-so sorry, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry." He wouldn't cry, he wouldn't cry, even as his voice began to hitch and he grasped her, tightly to him, and rocked softly.

She reached over his shoulder and turned on the radio, letting it play softly to hide the hitch in his voice. "You can," she said quietly, stroking his back. "It's not your fault, Pete. It's not. I did too much; sssh. Don't get upset with yourself."

"How can I not? How… how can I... because you didn't even barely touch me, a-and, I lost it, I lost... it." He wanted to run, as far as he could, but knew it wouldn't get him anywhere. So he just held her tighter to him, rocking softly and trying not to cry. "I'm such an idiot."

"You're not an idiot." She stroked his back constantly, giving small, reassuring touches and kisses anywhere she could reach. "You didn't. It was too soon, after what happened, after everything. I've been reading a lot of stuff, on the internet and stuff, and I knew it was too soon."

"Not too soon, I'm an ass." he rocked her softly, holding hr close to him until the shakes and trembles began to subside, and he just lay against her, quiet and soft, listening to her heart beat as he kept his eyes closed.

"You're not an ass." She kissed his face softly, and started to hum. Didn't realize she was doing it, because she always did it to calm Shaney down, and didn't realize she was humming to her boyfriend. "You're just fine."

They lay there, silent like that, her singing softly to him and he pressing his cheek to her breasts, eyes closed as he relaxed. Naked but for one lone sock, he was cooling down, and his balls ached. Hurt, so bad, so much, because he'd done this at least four times today. Get hard, start to jack off, and... just be unable to come. He knew, when he finally did, it was going to hurt and feel good all at the same time, and he let her go softly to look into her beautiful eyes. "Gonna... gonna jack off. Got to, hurts. Okay? W-want... me, to go in the bathroom?"

"No, you don't have to." She rubbed her cheek against his. "You can do it here. I want to see... can I help? Anything I can do?"

"Just… watch." He rolled over onto his back, throat bobbing as he looked at her, and his fingers wrapped around his limp cock for a moment. "have… have lube, Shay?"

"Yeah, I do." She reached over him, dangling for a minute as she pulled out a little box from under her bed, and tugged it up on the bed with her. She went through it, pulling out a vibrator and condoms, a piece of cardboard with clothes pins clipped to it, a blush brush , and finally,... "aha. Here we are. Brand new tube of KY water-based." She put the rest of the stuff back in the box, and handed Pete the tube. "There you go." She pulled her knees up to her chest, turning around so that her back was against the wall and she could see.

"Okay." He grunted, and let go of his cock enough to squeeze some of it onto his hand, closing his eyes as he warmed it and brought it back down to his cock. He began to rub, hard and fast like he did when he needed orgasm now, thumb flickering over the head over and over and over. His balls were hot, hard, and tense, and he massaged them with a soft whimper as he fought to come. Come, come, come, COME.

Shayla didn't say anything, just watched, her cheek resting on her knee as Pete's hand stroked over himself, and she catalogued each motion in her head. "Do you want me... to do something to myself? So you can watch? If it'll help, I will."

He wasn't even listening. Had to come, had to come, even if touching his cock was both so, so good and so, so bad. He whimpered and shook his head, struggling… struggling... then tasted her come still on his lips. He licked at his lips, over and over, and exploded. A gut wrenching sound of pleasured pain escaped his lips as he did it. His balls emptied, finally, and they ached as he came all over his belly and chest, moaning hard as he did it.

Shayla bit her lip as the bed shook with the strength of his orgasm. Hard, shuddering shakes that made the bed vibrate with every moan, and she slid a hand out to stroke his heaving chest.

He was shuddering, hard, and still going through the throes of orgasm when he began to cry. The deep, heaving sobs of a man that could wrench a woman's heart from her chest. Deep sobs of pain and anguish, misery, as he stared at the ceiling and let go of his cock, already softening, like it were poison.

Shayla slid out of her position as soon as she heard the sobbing start, and she moved over in bed, tugging her shirt on and holding him close to her. Her hand came around to the back of his head, stroking soothingly, murmuring softly as he cried. She turned the radio up with her other hand, letting the music drown out the noise, so nobody else would know what was going on. She kissed his cheeks, wiped his tears on her shirt. "Please don't cry," she said softly, finally. "You'll make me cry for you."

Christ, how he hated this. Hated feeling like this. He cried, not just for himself, but for the girl who loved him so much. Didn't know if he was ever going to be okay after all of this, and he lay in her arms, for long moments that turned into minutes..5..10...15, 20. The tears stopped, the shaking soothed, and he let her hold him, holding him back as the rock music played in the background. Held her close to his body… only moving once to tug the blankets up over them, and he pulled her close to his chest to pillow her head, holding her to his body as the night slept outside.

"You're going to be okay," she kept saying softly, not knowing that his thoughts were running along the same track. "I promise you'll be okay. We'll make it together, I promise you that." She didn't stop holding him, didn't stop stroking him or pressing soft kisses to his skin. "You want me to call your mom and tell her you're staying over? Or... well, you might not want her to know you're staying with your girlfriend--maybe we can sweet-talk Clark into calling her?"

"Told mom we were studying." He said quietly. His voice was gruff and scratched, eyes red rimmed and dry and itchy, and he held her softy to him as they breathed. "I love you. I'm sorry."

"I love you too, Pete." She rubbed his chest. "You don't have anything to be sorry about."

"I'm not a sissy. Before you came around and changed my life, I was a bad ass. I mean, total asshole. No one ever messed with me. Now, look. I'm crying, I'm in love, I have issues. Life is fun." But he meant it seriously, as he looked down at her. "And ten times better than it was."

"You're still an asshole, if that helps. And I say that with all the love in the world." She gave him a worried smile. "I don't think you've changed all that much. Not that anyone can see, anyway. You're just being seen with one girl instead of the whole school full." She squeezed his hand. "I love you."

He grinned at her, then, a little smile that lit his face. "Yeah, it helps. I dig being an asshole." He kissed her nose, gently. "I have changed."

"I haven't noticed." She snuggled up to his side. "You're still the same great guy."

"Shay? Can I ask you...what.." He swallowed. "What did you read on the net?"

Shayla blushed. "Chloe. She um... she sent me these links. To stories. And sites. With pictures. And all." She cleared her throat. "Of guys. Together."

Pete's eyes widened, significantly. "She sent you gay porn slash sites?"

"Yeah. Her stuff. Clark's. A few other sites. It was... eye opening."

He turned to stare down at her for a few long moments. "..And?"

"She, uh... emailed me. A couple suggestions. That she uses. With Whitney. Cause. Um. She thought it might... help."

His eyes were still very, very wide, and his mouth now dropped a little. "...like?"

"Well. Um. Okay. One of the things? I read about? Well... were... you know. Fingers. There. During blow jobs. For stimulation!"

He let out a long, low breath. "Shay... I... its complicated. I don't... I like to be touched... there. Did, anyway. Did."

"But not now. And I know that, it's cool. I shouldn't have tried to."

Throat cleared softly, Pete gently tugged her close and pulled the blanket tenderly over her shoulder, shaking his head as he slid one thigh between her legs, pressing up and snuggling up close. "I can't believe you've been reading slash. Angel?"

"Oh, gag. No. Spike/Xander. Giles/Ethan. Giles/Xander. Spike/Giles. And oh! Wesley! He's a wuss, but he's hot."

"Giles?" He stared at her, some more. "Is there some weird old guy fixation you've got? If there is, you better spill the beans and remind me to hide my dad."

"Giles!" she chirped. "If he were a real guy? He'd be GREAT for Big Daddy."

"Shay, ugh." He rolled his eyes. "Xander and Angel. Vamp Xander and Angel and Spike. That's where its at."

"Hell no. The only good Angel is Puppy Angel in the Wishverse. And I gotta tell you, Vamp Willow? One hot mama."

Pete chuckled softly, as he cuddled her a little closer, pressing his lips to her temple. "I love you, girl."

"I love you too, Pete." She snuggled as he cuddled her, and pressed herself close.

- = - = -

Felicia was staring at herself in Ethan's bathroom mirror. She'd just gotten out of the shower, and she had wrapped her long hair in a towel and piled it on top of her head.

Ethan had come home with a bit of a headache, muttering something about having seen more of Clark Kent and Lex Luthor than he'd ever wanted to see again in his life. So she'd taken care of him, making sure she'd made his favorite dinner, given him a shoulder rub while it was cooking, and had made enough coffee to last them through the night. They'd taken a hot shower together, and Ethan was currently reclining on the bed while she finished up in the bathroom herself. "Ethan? How you feelin', sweetie?"

"Alright, punkin." He said quietly. The king's treatment from his fiancé hadn't dulled his headache any, one that seemed to be centering above his left eye. He was lying in their cool room, a hot, small towel over his forehead, and he was resting quietly. So. Tired. One of his three uniforms was laying out, waiting for him for the next day, gun holstered and badge sitting on the small table beside the chair, and he ignored it completely as he rested.

He was really, really, really tired. And much too old to come on kids making out like… well, like kids. And be naked. No no no no no. NO.

Christ, he was too old for this.

Felicia unwrapped the towel from around her waist and slipped into the light green negligee that was waiting for her by the door, then let her hair down from the turban. "What is it, baby? Headache still bothering you?"

"Little bit."

He'd come on the five boxes sitting in his spare room, the spare room where their child was going to sleep, with stuff she'd kept from her time with Dominic Senatori. Had come on it during his lunch hour, when he'd come home to measure the wall for some wallpaper, and he just...

Didn't know how to come upon the subject. "You look beautiful."

"Thank you. You know, I think you're the handsomest man in the world." She slid into bed beside him, and kissed him softly.

He lifted a hand to gently wrap around her, tucking her close to him so they could rest together after the long day, and he rubbed her bare back gently. "Thank you, punkin."

"You're welcome." She reached up under the cloth and started to gently rub his temples.

He opened his eyes under the little towel as she touched him, and fought the flinch as he quietly said, "We always been honest with each other, right Fellie?"

"Of course we have." She pulled her hand back as he asked that, so that she could look at him. "What's wrong?"

"Can I be frank with you? We always been honest, but I need to ask ya something, and I don't want you to get offended, and angry with me."

"Ethan, ask me. I'm not going to get upset with you!" She stroked her hand over his chest. "Please... I don't want to think we're going to have the kind of relationship where we can't talk to each other."

"We don't, baby. Been honest and talking right since the beginning." He stroked a broad hand down her back. "You love me, Fellie? I mean, true blue love?" He slid the towel from his eyes and gazed at her quietly.

She met his eyes squarely. "Of course I do, Ethan." She tightened her hand on his. "I love you more than anything else in this world. You're... you're the person I want to spend the rest of my life with."

He shifted for a moment, thinking as he let his eyes fall from hers, over her body, then to where their hands were linked on his belly, and he gently squeezed again, before looking at her. "You still love Dominic, Fellie?"

"Do... I still love Dominic?" She blinked. "Where... what... where did that come from?"

"Our baby's room is filled with boxes you kept uh his, Fel." He said it quietly, without accusation. "I ain't never seen you keep boxes and stuff like that for anyone else." Not even for me. "You still love him?"

"I don't... I haven't been with Dominic in years, Ethan. We're friends now, nothing else."

"Then why, Fel? Why you feel compelled to keep all the things of his?" He looked up, then, and hurt flashed through his clear blue eyes, a deep rooted hurt.

"Oh... oh, no." She saw the hurt flash clearly, and she left one hand on his chest while she rubbed the other across her face. "It's not... I don't... it's not just things of his, Ethan. It's things of mine, too, memories that I've got. It's nothing to do with you; I have your box hidden in the closet." She got up from the bed and went through the closet, emerging a second later with a large box in her arms.

"Its... its not about that, Fel." He sat up, letting his legs fall over the side of the bed. "You bend over backwards for him, Fellie. You... you look at him like you look at me. You've got to tell me, 'fore we announce our wedding date, baby. can't go into this knowing there's someone you have unresolved issues with."

"I don't--he's my friend, Ethan, that's all." She slid off the bed with him, and got on her knees in front of him. "I don't want him, Ethan. Just you."

"Are you sure though?" He reached out to skim her face with his knuckles, gently.

"I am." She looked up at him. "Ethan... Dominic is part of my past. Yes, he's still around. Yes, he's my friend. Yes, I do just adore him. But I don't love him."

He trusted her, and he believed her, as his fingers carefully stroked over her cheek, her face, through her damp hair falling in ringlets around her face. "I love you, you know."

"I know. And I love you, Ethan. More than anything. The thought of losing you... I can't stand to think of it."

"Ain't never gonna lose me." Ethan's voice was gentle, kind, as he grasped her gently and tugged her up with him into the bed. He was exhausted and knew she wouldn't mind it, as he carefully pulled her close to his naked body, holding her close and tenderly to him. "Promise me somethin'?"

"Of course, Ethan."

"Put those boxes somewhere I'll never see, okay?" He pressed his lips to the back of her neck… her shoulder blades. "Don't wanna think about another man ever having you."

She nodded. "I'll get rid of them tomorrow. I'll send them to the dumpster." But even as she said it, there was a little pang in her chest at the thought of throwing away all the things she'd kept. "I'll take them out myself."

"No, baby." He knew her. He was her fiancé, wasn't he? "Ain't gonna ask you to throw them out. They mean something for you to have dragged them everywhere for fifteen years. Keep them, baby. Ain't never gonna ask you to throw your past away, when its what made you the fine lady you are today." He kissed her again, even as a little self mocking laugh entered his voice. "Just don't want to think about it."

"No, Ethan. I need to. If it's going to make you doubt how I feel about you, then it's not worth keeping. I'm not going to sacrifice you for the sake of the memories I've got tucked away."

But it made him frown, deeply, opening his mouth to speak... twice. Three times. Before sighing, deeply, and setting his head back on the pillow they were sharing. "Dammit."

"What?" She half sat up, looking distressed, stroking her hand over his bare chest, fluffing lightly through the sprinkle of chest hair.

"Ain't no sacrifice, Fellie. They're worth keeping cause they're you, baby." Ethan's thick fingers slid over her cheek, roughened by time and work, and gently stroked her baby soft skin. "They're a part of who you are. Don't want you to throw a part of you away, when its the whole woman, boxes and all, that I love."

Felicia laid her head down on his shoulder and curled up tightly to his side. In a few months she wouldn't be able to move close to him, because the swelling of her stomach would prevent it, but for now, she curled in as tightly as she could to him. "But I don't want you to doubt."

"I don't. I just... got scared, a little. Don't want no unresolved issues going on between us."

His fingers ever so tenderly stroked over her belly, already beginning to round and warm, gently stroking over the life growing in there, the life he and his fiancé had created, and the familiar joy, pleasure, and tears flooded his eyes as he kissed her face softly in his absolute elation.

Felicia smiled and kissed him back softly, rubbing over his hand as it rested on her stomach. "So what are we going to name him? If it's a him, that is." She kissed the tears away, and pressed her lips to his. "James, after your son?"

His lips quirked softly as he kissed her back, just as gently, stroking her red, wet curls from her face. "Isaac. What do yuo think?"

"Isaac. I like it." She smiled at him, and squeezed his hand on her stomach.

"I do too. What about... for a girl?" Murmured, quietly.

"I hadn't thought about a girl's name." She rubbed her hand over his again. "But... do you like Elizabeth?"

"Lizzie Goodall." Oh, yeah, Ethan smiled. "I think maybe I like that, Fellie."

"Lizzie Goodall," Felicia echoed. "Yeah. I like the sound of that too." She snuggled up against him carefully. "How about... Ethan Isaac?"

Oh man. She hit a tender spot in his heart with that, and his lips spread even wider as he looked down at her. "Yeah? Ethan junior?"

"Of course." She grinned up at him. "Think I wouldn't have your name on our son?"

"You've hit the spot, girl." He teased as he dove and sucked overjoyed kisses from her throat. "My first wife hated my name... wouldn't have our boy have it." And since that still hurt him, he said it, lightly. "Thank you, Fellie."

"Your first wife was an ignorant bitch. Ethan... I want our son to have your name. Ethan Isaac. That's what I want."

"I want it, too." He smiled down at her, cupped her face carefully. Christ, he hadn't been this happy in so long. "I love you."

"I love you, Ethan. Don't ever, ever think I don't."

"I won't, not ever." Soft, gentle kisses to her face. "Never, wife."

And it sent a very warm surge through her, causing her to shiver. "Wife. I like the sound of that so much."

"I know you do." Big grin, as he rolled over her suddenly without preamble. "What do you say, Fellie? Care to sign our pact?" A soft, slow, lewd thrust that thrilled him, blue eyes dancing down at her.

Felicia giggled and moved into the thrust, pushing her leg between his and pulling herself closer to him. "I'd love to, whenever you're ready."

"Born ready, girl." He laughed softly, pressing warm kisses to her cheeks and her lips as he slowly began to undress her, tugging the blankets over their bodies.

Felicia shrugged her shoulders, rolling the thin straps of the slip down so that she could slither out of the silk sheath. "Do you think next month is too soon? Or not soon enough?"

"For?" Ethan's mouth descended easily on her chest, her breasts, kissing and licking, the days stubble he hadn't felt like shaving scraping her body as he moved.

"The wedding," she said breathlessly, his mustache tickling her skin as he kissed her, and she brushed through his hair with slender fingers.

He burst out laughing against her pert, soft, warm breasts and looked up at her, as his fingers stroked the silk from her skin. "Not soon enough, by any chance, baby."

"Then pick a date?" she asked, panting softly as she raised herself up and let him push and tug the slip away and onto the floor.

"March 24th." He said it, breathlessly as he began to move over her. "March 24th."

"March 24." She echoed it. "I can handle that." She moved underneath him, positioning herself carefully beneath. "I can't wait." Felicia's chest arched up as she raised one hand, pulling Ethan's mouth down to hers.

 

-fin-

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