The Memoirs

Graham was pacing around the kitchen. Shayla, bless her little pointed head, was baby-sitting tonight, and the house was, for once, silent of baby cries.

He'd only been in this farmhouse about a month, but it already felt like home. More home than the empty house in Vancouver had. The sling over his shoulder prohibited him from moving too quickly, but he was moving fast enough, because he was almost used to it.

Not only had he broken his wrist fighting with his fool of a brother, he'd pinched some tendon in his elbow and the cast went from his bicep to his knuckles, and he was cursing up a storm and thanking Christ that it wasn't his working hand.

Thank God, too, that Derchi's delivered. Because despite the two shelves of gourmet cookbooks currently sitting over the stove, there was no way he could cook a fancy meal one-handed. Instead, he was busy unpacking the best food in Smallville onto the table in the little dining room, complete with a candelabra and vase with a rose in it.

Toni was just cutting off the engine of her teeny tiny little Honda when she saw him pass over the window of his home. The night had fallen already, darkness skittering over the sky as the moon and a thousand stars came out. It was balmy, lovely for a mid April evening, and she sat back for a moment in her seat as she watched him. Only his shadow was visible in the dining room window, but she watched anyway, as he began to open... take out boxes.

Which made her laugh. Just... she giggled, softly, shaking her head and looking up at the roof of her car. "Give me my strength tonight, Lord. Don't ask much of you, but please, answer my prayer. Let it go well." A small part of her whispered Let me let him go. But she ignored it, just slipping her keys into her purse and stepping out. A bottle of white merlot was in hand, and she set both purse and bottle on the roof as she locked the doors and pulled on her sweater. A slender, snug pink dress that went to her knees, teeny spaghetti straps hidden by a lilac cashmere sweater. Her splurge of the month had been this exact dress, and she'd been saving it for when Graham finally asked her to do something with him. She'd been waiting, knowing he would cause she knew him, and her pink sandals matched perfectly. From Edge City, of course.

She took the wine and her bag, and carefully walked up the steps, making sure her lump of metal wouldn't roll down the street, and carefully knocked on his door.

"Fuck!" Graham swore it softly as one of the napkins almost fell into the tray of manicotti as he was trying to maneuver it onto the plate. "Come on in, it's unlocked!" He was still swearing under his breath as he fished it out and tossed it into the bag of refuse by the table before packing all the rest of the trash into it and taking it out into the kitchen. He came back into the dining room, flicking a grill-lighter frantically, trying to get the candle to light.

And there she stood. Watching him, one handed, trying to get a candle to light, and she smiled quietly, as she tipped her head. Didn't say anything for a moment as she closed the front door behind her, and watched him attempting to work the grill lighter. "Hi, Graham."

He was still swearing, but out of deference to the lady's presence, he switched it to Gaelic so they were mostly incomprehensible mutterings. Finally the flame lit and he touched it to each of the candle wicks, watching them jump into life. "Bloody hell," he said, flinging the lighter back towards the kitchen.

Then he looked up at her. "Y'look beautiful tonight, darlin'."

"Thank you. You look very handsome, too." She took a step forward, then... hesitated. "The house looks really beautiful. You must have been working overtime to get it finished." Don't babble, Ton'. "How's your arm?"

He looked down at the cast. "Dunna hurt s'much as it used'ta. How's it feelin' not t'have yer cast?"

"Great. Fabulous, even. If you count one leg being lighter than the other." A swallow. "I brought some wine... so we can have with dinner. Which smells divine, by the way."

He coughed lightly. "Y'caught me on that. Dinna make it; couldna. Had ta have it delivered."

"I know." A moment, and she smiled. "I saw you, through the window." She looked around though, frozen where she stood, before she smiled a little. "Kicked Shaney to the Luthors?"

"Nah, just t'my little sister, which I s'pose is th' same thing." He shook his head. "I'm a unmannerly pig. Please... come in. Sit down." He moved forward jerkily as he reached for the wine bottle, and to take her sweater to the closet.

Toni quickly shed out of it, running a hand over the straps of her dress to make sure they were both up, and smiled a little as she entered the dining room with him. A little shift, a swallow. "Let me open it... you really can't, big guy." She took the bottle, smiling again as she entered the kitchen from the dining room with him. "How's work been?"

"Busy up until a few days ago." He sighed. "I need t'find someone t'partner with. Someone who's got ties in the community. If I don't... dunna know what'll do nex'."

"Mmm." She answered it, as slender fingers that had cut into a body only that morning now screwed at the top of a bottle. "I know how that's been. Ever since construction finished at the LuthorCorp buildings we've been slow. The construction around town still keeps us in business," She clucked a tongue and quirked a grin. "But I'm telling you, we might have to shut down before too long."

"Canna believe a hospital like yours is shuttin' down." He shook his head as he rummaged through the glassware and came up with two wineglasses which were hanging by the stems in the cabinet. "Th' crews I've been workin' with are almos' done."

"That'll be nice to see. Town's really exploded. Its nice having a Payless close to work again, I missed that for a long time." With the perfect smack against the bottom of the bottle she got it to pop, and she pulled the cork out and set it to the side as she poured them both a glass.

Graham held the glasses steady as she poured, and then he nodded towards the dining room. "Let's sit down; ye've got t'be tired af'er work."

"Not really. Had a good nap, but I'll admit these sandals kill my toes. What women do to look good" For their men? "For dinner dates." A little smile and she took her glass, setting the wine on the counter. She felt like she couldn't talk to him, and she grasped, with pain, towards any subject. "How's your family?"

His face hardened slightly at that. "Wouldna know; dunna talk to them much lately."

"I see." Because of me. "You should, you know."

"Dunna really have anythin' to say to the lot of 'em. Shayla's th' only one, and she's decided she wants t'stay in that drafty old castle insteada movin' back in wi'me. Canna blame her, I suppose."

She looked down into her wine. Maybe tonight, after all, would be the night she let go. Instead of kicking her shoes off as she so badly wanted to do she settled into a seat in the dining room, sipping her wine carefully and crossing her legs, as she leaned back into the seat. No use arguing with him, and now their was a pained, quiet silence that drove a knife into her throat. "Dominic and Lionel are doing alright. I saw them yesterday. The nursery is almost finished...you should see what they've done to the place. There's fairy tales everywhere, and a chest already full of toys. She's got this little trunk, too, filled with teeny tiny clothes, like what would fit on a doll."

Graham's fingers tightened around the fragile stem of the wine glass. "Can we no' talk aboot m'bastard brother and that Luthor man?"

Her eyes shifted away from his… looked out the window and the pretty curtains, then back down to her wine. "How's Shane?"

"Growin' like a weed; seems just a few days ago he was snottin' on my shoulder and now he's toddlin' around the house." He sighed. "I've had t'babyproof th'house, and tis been a bitch t'do single-handedly."

"If you ever need help, I can help. I've had a lot of kids come in for common house injuries... fingers in the light socket, corners on tables, you name it."

"Aye, I can always use another set o'eyes. I've done alla could think t'do, an' if ye'd check behind me, I'd be grateful." He rolled the glass in his hand, and then set it down to poke at the manicotti. "How are ye feelin', darlin'?"

She did as he did, and picked up her napkin, smoothing it on her lap. She didn't quite watch him but didn't quite not, as she settled in closer and more comfortable to the table. "Alright. The morning sickness passed... now I'm just really happy all the time. Life seems so much brighter when you know you're sharing it with something growing inside of you."

Graham ground his teeth, but didn't make the comment that wanted to get out. Instead, he took a drink of wine, and washed the angry words back down his throat. "I'm glad t'know yer okay."

She could tell he was pissed. She wasn't born yesterday after all, and she set her fork down before she'd even gotten a chance to eat any of the food, and lifted her wine glass again, looking back towards the window. Strength, Lord. Just a little bit.

Graham didn't miss it, and he sighed gustily. "Ye canna expect me t'be thrilled, darlin'."

"No, I can't." Was all she said. "I don't expect you to, Graham." I don't expect anything from you. "I'm thinking I might take a vacation, while they're both in Ireland. Somewhere nice. I've been thinking about Cancun... maybe even Jamaica."

Another mouthful of wine, and it didn't want to go down, but he forced it. "Are ye sure that's th'best thing to b'doin' in your... condition?"

Her glass was set down with a clink. "Actually, yes, I do. A vacation is just what I need. Sand, surf, some warm cabana boy serving me lemonade with a little umbrella, and not havin' a care in the world for two and a half weeks. Yeah, its what I need."

Cabana boy. The mere mention made his vision wash red, and then green, and he was having a very, very hard time seein' straight. "Sounds like you have your vacation planned." Wasn't even aware that his diction had slipped back into the proper English he used with people outside the family. "Make sure you send me a postcard."

She'd struck a cord, and a part of her was disgustingly, outrageously glad to have angered him. They'd spent the last month trading all but two words to each other, and since that day at the hospital it had been the first time they'd even seen each other--really seen each other. Not all of it was Graham's fault of course, but her own as well, and she raised a brow at him. "I will."

"I'd appreciate the thoughtfulness." Voice was still clear and he still didn't notice. "If anything interesting happens while you're gone, I'll make sure to tell you. That is, if your postcard has a return."

She looked down, and lifted her napkin, setting it on the table. His words had stung, right down to the quick, and she tipped her head. "I was hopin' to see if you might have wanted to come with me, Graham."

Soft smile that was brittle around the edges. "Y'know I'd go with you, Toni, in a heartbeat, but under the circumstances, we can barely trade two words to each other. Don't think it would be the best for you if you took along the one problem you're trying to escape."

Toni just shook her head. "You're a damned ignorant man, Graham. I hope you know that, I really do. If there's anything you ever take from what we had, you remember that. You're a damned ignorant man, for not seeing what's in front of you and what's been offered. You'd rather wallow in your own self pity. But you know what? That's fine. I made my choice, without knowing the consequence. You know what? I'm happy. Really happy. Doing this has meant more to me than anything I've ever done. And if I had to do it again, I would, in a heartbeat."

Graham almost slammed his glass down but he knew the thin glass would shatter. Instead, he very calmly put the glass down on the table beside his plate, and sat back in his chair, adjusting his sling a little more comfortably across his shoulder. "If I hadn't seen what was being offered to me, Toni, I wouldn't have been nearly so upset when I heard what you did and found out that it could be taken away from me. If I hadn't known, then I wouldn't have beaten my little brother to a cracked rib over it. You're always telling me that I don't know what's in front of me, but darlin', I'm starting to think that you either don't know, or don't give a damn about what's in front of you. And that's me. Imperfect, issue-bearing, loathe-to-lose-you Graham Senatori. And I'm rather tired of not measuring up to what you expect of me."

Toni was very calm. As calm as he was. It broke something, inside of her, to hear the accent gone, to see him speaking so perfectly. It hurt. Badly. Because it meant she'd been shoved out of the comfortable space, and oh, God. "I wasn't talkin' about me, Graham. I was talking about your life. You have this beautiful, wonderful life in front of you, and you don't take from it. You don't take what you should, Graham, and that's going to come and bite you in the ass someday. Maybe not tomorrow, maybe not ten years from now, but it'll come, and you'll wish it hadn't." She paused, for a moment. "But you are ignorant, and you are stupid. I've been with you for six months, Graham. If I didn't see what was in front of me, I would have hit the road. But you see, that's why you're ignorant, cause you don't see it. You'd rather be at war with me, because you're pissed off at your life. I accept that. I accept that you don't want to touch me, or take me places, or see me hardly at all. I accept that, because I accept you. And maybe I'm a fool woman too, for accepting it, but my hearts not failed me so far."

"I'm not pissed off at my life, Toni. I am pissed off at you, my brother, his... husband, I suppose the word is now, and I'm pissed off at Lex."

She nodded... touched her napkin without really meaning to, aimless for something to do with her hands. "Do you need me to go?"

"No, I don't." He sighed. "I was hoping to ask you to move in with me tonight, but I can see now that might not be the best idea."

She gave a quiet snort. "What will movin' in with you fix, sugar bear? I mean, honestly?"

"Well, the intent was that sharing a house could possibly bring a better understanding of why you felt as though you needed to put yourself in danger by having this baby for my brother. I was hoping, too, that we'd be able to see more of each other, and, silly me, I was hoping that finally, it might just be a good idea to see if we can share the same space."

She couldn't believe what she was hearing. That he totally honestly believed it just… it made her shake her head, softly. Patience. Strength. Come on, God, work with me here. "You don't have to be sarcastic."

Another brittle smile. "Actually, yes, I do. Because I assure you that you don't want to see this grown man cry."

"Already seen your kin cry, Graham. Wouldn't be too different." but her voice was hot, strange and quaking, and she swallowed around the lump as she looked down. "I think maybe its just me, sometimes. I got lots of problems, you know. Talked to people about it... I'm just damaged goods. I'm not... what you need, for your baby, or for you, Graham."

His good hand thumped down on the table. "Bloody bullheaded woman! You should have Senatori blood in you for as stubborn as you are! You are not damaged goods!" he bellowed.

"Then tell me!" She was horrified with herself, with her entire life, when the cry came out on a sob, and the tears swamped her eyes. "Tell me why you don't want me! Tell me why you can't be near me, why you can't touch me! Tell me why you won't let me get near you! There's no other explanation for it, nothing else at all!"

Graham just growled as he got up from the table and stalked around to her chair. His hand went to grip the back of her head, to make her look into his eyes. "Bloody daft woman. First ye go an' get yer leg broken, and when I think ye canna do somethin' more, ye go an' get yerself pregnant and put yerself in danger. D'ye know how it'd rip the heart out o'me to have ye for my own and then to lose ye?" The grip on the back of her head tightened, and he kissed her, leaning over the table, hard and powerful as he could.

The yell she'd been waiting for. The kiss she hadn't. It was something different, something she hadn't had before from him or from any man and she was blubbering and crying like an idiot as he kissed her but she couldn't help it. it was like having a taste of what she couldn't have, and she knew what she couldn't have was good, so good. But she'd never get to it, never reach it, because they both had their own issues in the way. She let him kiss her, anyway, and kissed him back, even if it just made her so sad.

Graham kissed her for as long as he could, deep as he could, until he had to breathe. He rested his forehead against hers, and let his hand stroke the back of her neck. "Yer goin' t'be th'death of me, Toni Braxton. I hope ye know that."

She shivered, sniffling softly and trying in vain to rub the tears off her cheeks because she was Toni fuckin' Braxton here, people. But she sniffled, softly, and nodded, swallowing against the lump. "Probably. It'll do you good, you're boring."

"I'm no' borin'. Ye've got what Gideon called an excess o'personality." He wrapped his arm around her tight, pulling her close. "Y've got me so in love wi'ye I canna see straight. I dunna have a clue what I'm doin'"

She knew that, but hearing him say it made her lean her head against his shoulder, and wrap her arms around his waist. "Stop being such a butthead about things, for a start." but she rubbed the tears off her cheeks and hitched a quiet sigh, eyes closed. "Do this more often."

Graham straightened, with her arms around his waist and his good one around her back. "Hold on t'me, darlin'." He gave his shoulders and his hips a little shimmy to get her better situated against his chest, and once he had a good grip on her, he carried her into the living room, where there was a couch in front of the fireplace, and he sat her down on it. "Ye know that if I lose ye, it'll destroy me."

Him carrying her was nice. Very nice, and Toni didn't mind a lick as he picked her up like some distressed maiden and carried her into the living room. That he could spoke immeasurably of his strength, but she was still cautious, still wary. Pain was still too bright and hot in belly, an anger she refused to give up, in case this was all some facade. "I don't think so. You'll be strong, and you'll be good. Always were, Graham."

He shook his head. "No, I wasn't. Y'can ask my idiot of a brother if yer a mind to. I wasna anywhere near okay. Not until I met a certain lady doctor that, as he says it, put a little starch in m'shorts."

"You're a fool. You know that? I'm going to tell you, right here, right now, while I'm still in a fettle, not to use Lionel's word, but I'm rightly pissed off at you." She gave him a glare, as much as she could, which wasn't much. "You're ignorant, and stupid, and have I mentioned you're stupid? I should have put a boot in your shorts, because you need it."

"And I'm still angry w'ye, but that doesna stop me from wantin' to kiss you again." He sighed. "I'm no' an idiot, I'm no' stupid, but I am a fool, and I'll admit to it gladly."

"You're all those things." But before he could answer her, she gave in. Alright? She gave in. No one would ever have to know. She leaned forward and took his mouth with hers, kissing him firmly, deeply, darkly, taking it deeper, and deeper, to a place where breath wasn't needed and all there was was the hum of blood and the lovely, sinking feeling of being in love. And she hated him for it, and loved him for it, and wanted to shove a foot up his ass and cuddle him at the same time.

Fucker.

Graham's arm stayed around her shoulders so that his thumb brushed along her cheek as she kissed him, sucking hard and deep and pressing firmly as he murmured softly, nothing-words that were just sounds, listening to the blood rushing in his ears and his pulse pounding in his temples.

And she glared at him as she broke the kiss, and sat up, brow raised. "And that's just about enough of that. How about you order some pizza, I take these fucking sandals off, and we watch Leno? Orlando Bloom is on tonight. Burrr. Shiver me timbers." She shoved at him. "Go. And bring back beer."

Soft groan. "Yer not only gonna kill me, yer goin' t'break me back. I'll bring ye beer, and no pizza; we've got salad, manicotti, and garlic toast to finish in the dinin' room."

"Then bring it on, buddy." But she sobered for a moment, and yeah, she was being rash, and an idiot, and MORE rash, but she asked, "When's a good day to bring me stuff?"

The smile spread wide across his face. "Tomorrow's good."

"I'm keeping my apartment." she declared it, with a brow raised. "For a while. Alright? We take it a day at a time, sugar bear."

"It's alright by me, darlin'." Graham pushed himself back up to his feet, and looked down. "Y'dunna have t'worry about rent or house payments; tis all mine. Th'house in Canada sold fer twice what I needed fer this place, s'don't ye worry abou' payin' fer two places t'live."

"I'll help, where I can." She answered back, because something tightened when he said it. Christ, this was a bad idea, the worst idea in a long, sad history of bad ideas but she was doing it. Why? She was crazy in love, and maybe aching for someone to love and probably all three of those and she didn't care. "Buy groceries. I know you feed Shaney junk."

"Aye, I do feed m'boy junk when he craves it. Bloody Lionel Luthor's fault, has the child spoiled six ways from Sunday." He sighed. "Dunna mind y'splittin the other bills w'me, Toni, cause I know ye, and I can tell what yer thinkin'. I just wanted to let y'know, that was one ye didna have t'worry aboot." Deep sigh. "Guess I'll be hirin' someone to help me build Arnold a doghouse."

She grinned. Broadly. "Arnold sleeps in the bed with me, sugar bear."

Graham puffed his chest out. "No' anymore."

"Can't share your woman's bed with another man?" Toni raised a brow as she peeled her sandals off, wriggling her toes and tugging her legs under her butt leaning to the side.

"No' when th'other man tries t'bite me every time he gets near me, no."

"He likes you. Kind of. You just have to be gentle with him." A nod. "He's a little puppy dog at the middle, just a little...over exuberant over me. I can't blame him, though, he saved my life once. I ever tell you?" She rose then, to her bare feet, and padded up to him… then past him, and into the kitchen where she knew Heinekens were waiting in the fridge. "Burglar came in, tried to make off with my stuff, and Arnold landed him in the hospital."

"If that is kind o'likin' me, I dinna want t'be on his bad side." Graham followed her into the kitchen, then cut through to the pantry where he brought out a little wheeled serving cart. "Nicked it from that old batty Bird woman at th'castle. Used it t'push some o'my things t'the car and made off with it." He loaded the plates and the beers onto the cart, so he could push it one-handed. "And there we are." He loaded the silverware and napkins next, then the bread and drinks on the bottom shelf, in a little basket so the beer bottles wouldn't roll off.

She... stopped him, plucked one of the beers off the tray, and disappeared into the kitchen again. When she returned, she was instead holding a bottle of Dr. Pepper, and she winced slightly as she rejoined him in the living room. "Sorry bout that, I almost forgot." But then, she offered her typical snort, and wriggled her brows. "Ms. Bird won't mind, she's a cagey old bitch after all. I love her, you know."

Graham blinked. Looked down at the cart, picked up his own bottle, took it back, and exchanged it for a bottle of pre-made iced tea, and brought it back into the living room and he sat down on the couch beside her. "Aye, but she's too much like me bitch of a mother t'like her."

"Bastard." She took the iced tea, glared, and cracked open the bottle to take a sip as she plunked back into a heap on the couch. She snuggled in and looked even smaller in the process, giving a lofty sigh at the same time. "I hate your mother with a fiery vengeance unknown on this earth." A beam.

Graham took the bottle back, handed her the soft drink, and touched the rims together. "Cheers. You're not alone."

"She's a bitch. How you can stand her, I'll never know. Though let me tell you, she's suddenly become really nice towards Dominic and Lionel since she found out they're having a baby."

Rough snort. "Aye, a'course she has. Doesna want to be kicked out o'her grandbaby's life, not that Morgan'd do it. But that bastard Lionel Luthor would, and he'd have my support, I tell ye. If she wasna my mother, I'd no let her around Shaney."

"You'd really love seeing what they've done, Graham." But she knew it was uncomfortable for him to talk about, so she just brought her plate down and plunked a pillow from the side of the couch, setting it on her lap and her plate on top of it. "I saw Riley at the grocery store yesterday. Ariel is so big."

Soft growl about the baby's nursery, and then he laughed. "Aye, she is. She's... ah, four months, or five, I canna remember, and she's big as a house--she's takin' after Shaney, and Da's side. Like me. We're all big as houses, and everybody else is takin' after Mama."

"You're right, about that. Megan and Dominic and Riley are all slender and tiny. Lindy's big, but she's got birthin' hips, which make her look gorgeous. Shane's gonna be big as you, pumpkin, and so is Ellie. Ellie's gonna be tall as a model."

"Aye, Ellie's gonna look jus' like her Aunt Meggie, and her mama's gonna hate it, cause the boys and the girls are gonna be after Ellie like the plague. Shaney's gonna be a linebacker of a kid, just like his Da."

"Of course he is. Like Clark's friend, Whitney. That boy is big as an ox." But her smile was a little sad, as she looked down at her pasta and took a little bite. "Clark and Lex, been so sad. They're such good kids, you know, really good, the kind that you know they're solid and real, down to the core."

"Aye, and he was a good worker too, steady and strong. Was before he got suspended anyway." Quiet pause, and his stomach rumbled and he fed it a piece of garlic bread. "T'was a shame about his mama. Understand his Da died not long ago, poor boy."

"'Bout a year ago." She said, softly. "I was helping his doctor, lookin' for anything to do to help him. Had heart disease...the technology we needed to save him just didn't exist. He was in so much pain, the poor man. But you'd be surprised how funny people can be. People, when they near death, make fabulous recoveries from their illnesses sometimes. Its like they improve, thirty, forty percent, enough to go home and finish something they needed to do. I think he did that, he finished it, and died in peace. In some ways, he had it better than his wife did. She died without finishing what she started. It'll be up to his friends and family to do it for her, so she can rest."

"I feel sorry for th'boy, I do. Doesna have anyone t'turn to. Wonder if he's lookin' for a job; dunna have much t'offer him except a place on m'crew, once it gets started again."

"That girl of his is pregnant." Toni sighed, quietly. "I'm not supposed to know, but Lex told Dominic and Dominic told Lionel and Lionel told me. No one's supposed to know... she's trying to keep it from him, while he gets back on his feet."

"That canna be good for either of them." Graham settled back on the couch, and put his arm around Toni's shoulders. "I'll talk t'him as soon as I can."

"Might be what you're looking for, sugar. He runs Fordman's after all."

A blink. Another blink. Then a laugh. "Darlin', you were right before. I'm a bloody idiot. In all th'time I've been here, I never made th'connection that the boy was a Fordman of the Fordman's store."

She grinned. "Told you you're dumb. Dumb as shit, but I love ya anyway, sugar bear. His grandfather started to store, so Jack told me last year, and it passed on, now into Whitney's hands. It might be good for a hardware store as nice as his around here to go into business with you, and you him."

"Aye, it'd be just what I need. Willna bore ye wi'the details, but I need a steady partner, who's knowin' the area and knows who needs wha' kinda work done. And I need his name."

"Talk to him, sugar." Toni tipped her head to look up at him, and set her pasta to the side. She was tired, and her aching heart had calmed a little bit, and with that she had calmed and she was sleepy. Tired of holding the pain in, and now that it had lessened, she was exhausted. "Mmm." She murmured, and lay her head on his shoulder as they watched the TV. "I gotta go in tomorrow at five."

He looked down at his watch. "It's almos' ten now. D'ye wanna drive home, or d'ye wanna stay here?" His hand went to stroke her shoulder as she leaned so warmly against him.

"Whatever you feel's appropriate, sugar."

"I'd like ye to stay."

She waited for a moment, their in the flickering firelight, watching Orlando Bloom who really looked hung over talk to Jay, and whispered in the dark, "You ever going to make love to me, Graham?"

"Aye, when neither of us is crippled by plaster." Soft kiss to her forehead and then to each of her cheeks.

She nodded, slowly. "You sure? That you want me. I understand, if you're...grossed out, or whatever, by the baby. And 'fore you get all offended, it happened to me before."

Graham chuckled. "If I wasna such a gentleman, I'd tell ye exactly how much I want ye, baby or not."

Oh. "Tell me anyway."

"I've done m'self almost every night thinkin' about you. Canna help m'self. Jus' think of how beautiful you are, and how ye make me feel, and I'm ready." His voice was soft as he stroked her hair. "Almost canna look at ye sometimes, cause I dunna think I could control it long enough not to embarrass m'self."

The image of Graham, cuddled in his big bed with his fingers around himself was an image Toni was not prepared for in any regard. She flew over with goosebumps, her throat bobbing tightly, and her fingers slid to find his in his cast, and link. "I didn't… think you did that. Because I'm naive, I... I just thought...I mean, me too. You don't even know how many times Arnie had to sleep on the couch and leave me be."

"Darlin', I may have a head thick as stone, but I'm no' made of it. I'm a man, an' I'd have t'be dead not to think of ye." He wiggled his fingers lightly in hers as they poked out of the cast.

"Do you think… maybe, I could tou…" A swallow. "Touch you? We don't... have to go... further, or even... I'm crazy, just to feel you. I'm a woman of my blood....some women are pristine and clean and smart, but I... like the earthbound things. I mean...I stopped makin' sense." A deep, long breath and she closed her eyes to gather her thoughts.

Graham didn't answer her yes or no. Instead, he reached his good arm over to sit her up, just enough, and then he caught her hand in his, brought to his mouth to kiss each finger, and then put it on his chest, where the top two buttons of his flannel shirt had been left open.

Oh.

Oh.

Her breath quickened, and big tawny eyes came up to meet his once, before her throat bobbed. Oh. She carefully slid her fingers inside and bit her lip, tightly, hard, very tightly, stroking over the warm, solid, hairy flesh gently. It felt good, this, good, and if she imagined she could feel him all over her body. Her fingers carefully, very slowly, unbuttoned another button, then another, and her fingers explored without another word said.

Graham lifted his fingers up to rub over her bobbing throat, then swept down to stroke over her collarbone, then just sat back, his fingers undoing the bottom buttons of his shirt and pushing it aside completely so that his chest was exposed her touch. Soft mat of hair tangled between his nipples, and down his chest and stomach.

She had a thing for teddy bears. No one knew it, just her, but her fingers were very gentle, careful along his skin, as her throat bobbed again. She felt like a scared teenage virgin again, and she carefully, carefully, slid her fingers through the soft curls, rubbing a nipple carefully under her thumb. He was beautiful, outrageously slow, built strong but with a narrow waist that spoke of hard labor and strength. Christ be, he was beautiful, and she breathed the sentiment out, softly, as she touched.

Graham gave a soft little moan as Toni's thumb rubbed over him, and he brought his good hand up to cup over the back of hers, stroking her knuckles with his fingertips and murmuring soft words of approval and encouragement to her as he eased her hand lower, letting her know without speaking aloud that it was all right.

Ohhhmuhguh. She leaned forward and licked the tense little nipple, her body trembling as her palm set flat against his chest, rubbing gently as she licked the nipple. Soft, warm licks, then sucks, nibbling softly before trailing a warm, tender kiss up his chest and to his throat. She'd never kissed here, not ever, and she licked and sucked, nibbling now on his skin. Good, so good, like man and heat and soap and oh, God.

Graham scraped his beard lightly, playfully, across the bridge of her nose as she kissed up his throat, and then tilted his head forward so that the soft bristles scraped over her shoulder, and he dragged it up her throat as he leaned forward to kiss her mouth again, tongue shooting in to taste her thoroughly before letting go and sitting back again, hand tucked behind his head, sling lying to the side and cast supported on the couch cushions.

She smiled, crookedly, her skin still tingling with the brush of beard, at his stance. Her body was waking up, big time, but she reared her hormones back on in as she looked at the pleasured, satisfied stance of his body. "Aren't you a cat, waiting to be licked." She chagrined, though she smiled again, rubbing her thumb gently against the nipple she'd just touched. She was dizzy with the taste of him but she kept steady, sighing softly, quietly.

He grinned back up at her. "Always obligin' the lady," he said softly. "Didna want t'have anythin' in the way when y'touched me again."

"Like it?" She asked, softly, from her seat next to him, though she was facing the wrong way and on her knees. "Like it, Graham?"

Graham shifted, pulling one leg up on the couch so that his erect cock, still swelling with blood and need, was clearly outlined against his thigh by the taut pull of material across it. "What d'ye think, lass?"

Oh… oh boy. Speechlessness on Toni was bad. She knew it. Her breath shuddered out of her slowly, her throat wouldn't stop swallowing even as she tried to swallow a breath. He was hard, like stone, she could see it, see him, and all the smart aleck remarks flew from her brain. He was gorgeous, gorgeous, and she wanted so bad for him to take her, but he couldn't... wouldn't. Plus, he was much too content like this she knew, and she shivered all over. "You're a big boy, Graham." She whispered it, softly, and for the first time let her fingers carefully trail over the hard outline he was showing her. "Very big."

"Nay, I'm not big, m'darlin'." His grin widened as she explored him, and his head arched back. "Just... built in proportion."

"You're big to me." She whispered quietly, as she stroked softly, warmly, touching him because he was letting her... then swallowed, and pulled her fingers back. "I.... we shouldn't... I won't be able to stop."

He nodded softly. "aye, I know. Tis why I didna touch ye more than I did. Couldna stop m'self. Your skin's addictive, Toni... smooth as silk, sweet as chocolate." He ran his fingers up her arms as he spoke softly.

His voice had her eyes falling to half mast, her skin prickling, her cheeks flushing softly. She wanted him more than anything in the world, anything in the world, but she wouldn't take until he did. He was letting her touch, and touch she would, but... she couldn't take what she wanted until he did it himself.

There wasn't any harm in exploring, though.

"Can... can I see you? Will you let me? I want... to touch you. I know… not ready, but... just to touch?"

"Aye, but I'll tell you truly... ye may get more than y'bargained for, because my control isna at it's peak righ'now." His hand slid down her shoulder, to cup a firm breast through the new dress. "And if y'dinna mind doin' all th'work..." he let the suggestion trail off for her to pick up as he gently kneaded with his free hand.

"Oh." She groaned, quietly, her head falling back as his hand cupped over her. As big and soft as she imagined him to be, and this was just a tease for the senses, she knew, but her nipple peaked and strained against her dress as the raw delicious agony of another persons touch fueled the fire. Her fingers slid down over his tummy, flat as a board as it was, and to his khaki pants, which she carefully unbuttoned with shaking fingers. She didn't pull him out... she was afraid what she'd do if she did...and instead tugged the pants down carefully, to show navy blue boxers, with his cock ram rod hard underneath. She gently stroked the hard heat through cotton… then ducked her fingers in to touch, and oh, dearest Jesus.

Soft hiss, and Graham bucked his hips up into her touch. "aye, aye darlin'," he encouraged softly, reaching down and cupping his hand over hers, momentarily abandoning her breast as he showed her the quick, slightly rough strokes that he liked. Once he'd done that, his hand returned to chest, slipping inside the dress to touch.

"You want..." Oh. OH. GOD! "Gr… Graham. I didn't... I don't want this… here. Can we… in your bed? We don't have to... all the way." She was speaking in incomplete sentences. Dearest Jesus, who could blame her. "Just... please? Please, Graham. If... if you want to come. I want... bed. Please."

"No' my bed, Toni," he said, pausing to take a breath. "Our bed. And aye, we can." He let go of her breast and instead, caressed her cheek. "We can go as far as ye wan', my darlin'. But if ye wan' that, ye'll have to ride me."

She gasped, softly, her breath stuttering hard as she bit her lip. Tightly. Tightly tightly tightly. Uuhn. "Graham." She was really beyond language, beyond everything, because Graham, this side, the sexy side... totally foreign. Normally she hated unknown things, but this...was something she was unprepared for, and she did feel nervous, and skittish, and scared, and full of want and ache. "Oh. I...oh." She was flushed, skin rosy, and she swallowed for the trillionth time. "little at a time. Lets go upstairs."

Graham rose to his feet in a single, fluid movement, used to shifting his bulk around carefully. He shrugged out of his shirt entirely, leaving it on the couch as he held out his hand to her. "Let's go, then."

This... wasn't happening. Or maybe it was. So glad she shaved. "This is like a dream." She whispered softly, in the quiet house, as she took his hand gently and left their food behind, grabbing the bottle of iced tea on the way as she trembled. "You want me, Graham?"

"Aye, Toni. I want ye. In every way I can think of, I want ye." He looked down at his cast. "An' I promise ye, ye'll have me the way yer meant to, as soon as I'm rid of this bloody thing."

"I can wait." She answered, softly. Yeah. Most definitely. She lifted her dress a little so she could climb the steps, still holding his hand, and yeah, so maybe he'd humbled her. "I... want to make you feel good. That's what I want. I want… you to touch me, too. I... its been so long, and I've never felt this way about... about anyone.

Graham reached back and pulled her closer to him, so they were side by side, instead of her following him, and he kissed her. "Ye always make me feel good, Toni." He paused at the top of the stairs, and looked at her. "Ye don't... I dunna want ye doin' anythin' that ye'll regret, darlin'. If ye want to stop, then now's th'time to stop. Before I canna."

She kissed back, very tenderly, and yeah, so, maybe her ovaries were ready to plop out. But he looked so dashing, standing at the top of the steps with his shirt open and his belly and just... Jesus, give her strength. "Don't… want to stop." She whispered, softly, her fingertips gentling over the collar of his shirt. "I don't want to stop, Graham. I want...to have you? Please, I want... to touch you. I never wanted anything else so much, sugar bear."

His arm hooked around Toni's waist and pulled her closer, leaning down to kiss her again and again, snuggling her close in her little pink dress. "Then come on; I've been waitin' for ye a long while, m'darlin'."

Oh boy. "Can I tell you somethin'? Promise me you won't laugh?" She asked, as they crossed the hallway to his bedroom. She'd already slept in that warm bed many times... never in the way they were about to, of course, and she was shivering quietly, nonstop.

"Willna laugh," he mumbled softly, his mouth seeking the graceful curve of her throat as he licked, nibbled, and sucked.

She arched her head back, for his mouth, and whispered, "I'm really... really nervous. Really nervous. I should prolly mention I am also pretty nervous." Her fingers skittered down his back, carefully, stroking the small of his back and his ass tenderly. "I feel like I don't know you, sugar. Don't have enough of your body." her mouth slid gently over his nipple, right where she reached, biting and sucking softly. her lips fit perfectly around it and did she mention she was nervous? Nervous.

Graham opened the door with a swift kick, and the only light in the room came from the window by the bed, where the moonlight spilled in across the floor. He pulled her into the room behind him, and pushed her down to sit on the edge of the bed as he turned on the bedside lamp. He reached up and undid the sling in silence, then let the shirt fall off his shoulder as he peeled it off over his cast and tossed it over the chair in the corner of the room. "Ye dunna have t'be nervous, Toni. I'm no gonna make ye do anythin' you don't want, an' we're no' gonna rush."

"Been two years, sugar bear." She whispered it, softly, trembling a little as she watched him carefully unsling his arm and take his shirt off. he was even more beautiful, tawny skin almost golden in the lamplight, and her heart began to steady, high beat of a woman excited. Her thighs were already slickening as she watched him, watched her Graham, who hadn't had a sexy bone in his body, suddenly emote it like it were a drug. "Don't know if I remember how."

Soft chuckle. "I believe tis like ridin' a bike, m'lassie. Once ye know it, ye never fergit it." He sat down on the bed beside her, kissing her again, holding her face carefully with his rough fingers. "Y'tell me, what ye wan', and ye'll have it."

"I want everything." She said it on a gasp, as her mouth slanted over his and dove, took, wanted. She crawled in his lap and sent them sprawling backwards on the bed, because yes, she was just about through having self control. "I want everything, I want everything. Graham, please. Please, touch me, touch me please." her mouth fell and began to suck and nibble at his neck, his throat, as the sky rumbled outside. it had been dark and dreary a good part of the afternoon, and she hoped for rain. She wanted it to rain, to hear it as they touched one another and oh, God, he felt so good. Her mouth came down and wrapped around his nipple, sucking it into her mouth softly. She nibbled all around it, her fingers sliding through his chest hairs to the other nipple, tweaking and rubbing as she shivered all over.

Graham reached across her shoulders, pushing the slender straps of her dress down as he pressed butterfly kisses onto each shoulder. His fingers trailed the straps down to her wrists, and he kissed the back of her hand, then sucked each finger as it rubbed against his chest, easing the straps off and over each hand. Slowly, because he was one-armed, he gathered the fragile silk in his hand as he pushed it up, over her head.

She leaned up, over him and helped him tug the dress over her head. She wore nothing over it, nothing at all, naked as the day she was born. It embarrassed her, and put a flush into her cheeks as she looked away, quietly, shyly, and yeah, so maybe bedroom Toni wasn't all that wild but did she give a fuck? Course not. She just shivered softly and covered her breasts with her arm, quietly and self consciously, as she softly tugged on his nipples and leaned down, to suck on his navel.

"Dunna hide from me, Toni." Graham scooted back on the bed so that he could lie down on his side, cast supported on the mattress as he reached out with his hand, tugging her hands down from her body. "Let me see how beautiful y'are."

She swallowed, hard, and watched where he lay on his side right in front of her. She was sitting on her left foot, the other spread a little out to the side, and she wished she could cover more of her nakedness from him but... what he wanted, he got. She moved her arm, carefully, swallowing hard and hoping he wouldn't… think less of her, or not like what he saw, or something. The last one hadn't, and it had made her work extra hard on making herself the way she looked.

A flash of winking blue light below her waist caught his eye, and Graham leaned forward just a bit to look, and then he had to grin. A blue-tipped bar pierced Toni's navel, and he slid a finger down the center of her chest to stroke over that. "Only you, my sweet darlin' girl... only you." He moved closer to her, so he could raise his hand back up and stroke over firm breasts and pebbling nipples, to brush over the swell of her hip as he turned it, and saw a flash of color. He pulled her even more, and was surprised to find a tattoo.

A little butterfly, perched on the back of her hip, and Graham leaned over her body, licking the bold black lines, tracing with his tongue the outline that marked her beautiful skin.

"Oh." She whispered, and her head fell back on her sigh as he touched her. Investigated the remnants of her youth, and her body shivered as his tongue snaked out so close to her ass and licked. Oh, dearest God. She shivered, her breath hitching silently as she rubbed her fingers through his head full of spiky hair, and trembled, hard. His back was smooth and warm and her fingers slid over it, her body shivering harder as she ducked her fingers down. They danced over his belt... his zipper and what was left of it unopened, and she carefully, slowly, gently tugged them down. With an arch for him she'd gotten socks, underwear and pants down, and she groaned.

He had thighs like an ox. Hard and strong, that led to a dick she just... he was long, thick, with hard, large balls and beautiful hips. Long legs, strong and shapely, and the fun they could have once they knew one another this way. "I can't… can't believe this is happening. I waited so long… I wanted so long. Graham...you're not just doing this, because I want it, right?" She had to ask, before they went further, her fingertips moving over his hard cock and gently stroking the base.

Graham slowly pulled his mouth away from her hip, and kissed around to her belly, then up to look at her. "Sweetheart, ye wouldna be touchin' me like this if I didna want ye too. I dunna take advantage, and I dunna let people take advantage o'me. I do what I wanna." And he leaned forward, sucking one nipple into his mouth entirely while kneading the other with his hand. "And no' t'be crass, but I wan t'do ye."

"Ahhn!" She cried it, loudly, her head falling back again and her hand vicing on his cock when he sucked her nipple into his mouth. The left one, and he was doing things to it that had a fresh rush of heat going to her middle. She leaned down... then lay, beside him, their legs twining close as they lay their, finally naked, finally close. He was warm and wet, pressed against where she was warm and wet, and she gave a soft thrust as she arched into his mouth, her own fingernails streaking down his back.

Graham grunted hard when her grip tightened on his cock, and he sucked her nipple harder, biting it carefully with his teeth as his arm wrapped around her waist. He rolled onto his back, cast carefully propped up on a pillow, and settled her astride his hips, raising himself up at the waist to switch breasts, taking the right one into his mouth instead of the left, letting a wide hand slide down her belly to rub right beneath her piercing.

She whimpered, softly, softly and deeply. Who wouldn't? He was master of his trade, after all, master of this, even though he had been an idiot and hadn't shown her before this. She was pretty positive he was an ass. Didn't matter though, because she was exactly .5 seconds away from losing her mind. His hands and his mouth were gentle and firm, and oh, Jesus. She stroked down his flanks, over his hips, over his cock and balls. She gently stroked over the heavy balls, for the first time, nervous and jittery and full of joy. Heavy in his hand, and thrilling because she could make him ache by her doing this. She stroked again, tenderly, over his tree trunk thighs, and down his ass, where she stroked gently, warmly, shivering in delight and lust. "I... like that. Like that, Graham, like it, l-like it, feels... ohh.."

Graham groaned at the soft touches to his cock, to his balls, tingling down to his toes as they curled and he tried not to buck her off with the need and the urge to thrust up into her hand. "Feels s'good, m'darlin'. Feels s'good." It was a single, moaned breath that was barely comprehensible, and he let his hand drop lower, let his thumb rub lightly at the crest of her mound, barely parting the lips as he sighed again, twisting his torso up to kiss her mouth again.

"Don't be nervous... don't be scared, sugar." Toni whispered it, softly, as she kissed him tenderly. She knew he was out of his mind with want, and she was just as crazy, but the kisses and the touches told her all she needed to know. She wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him, deeply and tenderly, before pressing him back into the blankets. She knew he was more nervous than she, so she watched him, quietly...wickedly, as she straddled his knees and brought her lips down to his cock. Warm, tenderly kisses along the huge organ, gently licking and sucking at little spots she knew all men enjoyed, her lips rubbing softly against the tip.

Graham fell back, completely flat, letting the pleasure wash over him. A year and a half, almost two years, since he'd felt another person's touch on him like this, and his eyes squeezed shut as his fist clenched, fighting down the immediate surge of orgasm that wanted to rise and swell in his body. He forced himself to sit back up, and half-blind, he sought out her shoulder. "Toni... I want... I want fer us t'be the same; I want t'be givin' you the same as yer givin' me."

"Shh... sugar bear." She whispered it, reaching up to kiss him. "Shhh. Got all the time in the world, baby. All the time we need. It'll happen… lemme give this to you. You want so much, I can tell." Her fingertips slid tenderly, so tenderly, over his cock. "Let me make you feel good, sweetie pie. I want to see you orgasm because of me."

"I wan' all of it, Toni, m'darlin'. I want alla it." His hand stroked heavy down her shoulders, and he grunted in soft pleasure as her hands stroked over. "I wan' it all t'last."

"Have this, Graham." She whispered it, as she dropped her head back down and rubbed her lips so tenderly over the head of his cock, and breathed into it, "Let me make you come. There will be more, much more. Let me give this to you."

She was going to kill him. Dead as a fucking doornail. Graham's hand clenched into a fist, pounding gently on the mattress and forcing it back down again. "Aye, darlin', do wi'me what ye will, I'm yers t'command."

She smiled. Loved that. And gently, so gently, licked over the head of his cock, and hummed softly as she did it. His taste was bright, like sun kissed earth, and she let her tongue trail over it before wrapping around the tip and pressing him into her mouth. A long, slow press inside, her fingers gently rolling his balls in her palm, as she sucked upwards, licking at the head still in her mouth quietly before doing it again.

Another long, harsh groan, that wasn't nearly so quiet as the ones before it, and Graham's hand knotted tighter in the bedspread that cushioned his body. Toni's mouth was a sweet, hot furnace that consumed him whole, and he held back the impulse to thrust. Instead, he grunted with the effort and won, reaching out and gentling his fisted fingers against her cheek as he trembled.

She continued on, sucking and moving, rolling his cock in her mouth. She brought him in and sucked in slow circles, breathing shallowly through her nose until she slid up and let go, wrapping one tiny fist around him as she brought her mouth down to his balls. She jacked him off, softly, quietly, steadily, her eyes closed tight as she sucked one ball in... then two, letting them both go to concentrate on them individually as she stroked over his organ. She was shivering, her ass up in the air with her top end down, and it wriggled softly in her arousal as she licked and sucked, aroused and whimpered.

Graham pushed himself up, so that he was sitting up, and he could slide his hand down her back. Her skin was silky smooth under his touch, and he slid his hand further down, over the small of her back, and his long fingers molded around the curve of her ass, fingertips barely brushing the underside of her cleft.

A shivering sigh against his cock and she stopped playing with his balls and brought him back into her mouth. Hard, quick sucks followed by slow, gentle ones, and whenever he moved for more she stopped and went soft again. Fast, hot, slow, gentle, over and over and over, the pattern mixed up and jumpy and it just made her wriggle more, her pleasure pronounced and on a fine, sharp edge.

Graham's fingers stroked further over, fingertips becoming slick with her essence as she wriggled under his touch, and he gritted his teeth. Wasn't. Going. To Come. At all. Not yet. He sat up a little further, his fingers seeking entrance into her, and shuddered as her mouth slid over his cock and her lips rubbed a particularly sensitive spot.

She didn't like this.

She lifted her head from his cock, licking her lips softly, and reached up to kiss him, warmly, gently, slanting her mouth and kissing him as she crawled up, without a word said, without anything said, where he was sitting up, and carefully, slowly, tenderly, lowered herself onto him so that when he slid inside of her, it was easy and warm and sweet. He was big but she didn't mind, just gently rolling her hips forward as she planted herself onto him. Still kissing him, never let go of kissing him, her arms around his neck and holding him close. He wasn't going to ask, and she didn't want to wait anymore. Not anymore. So she rolled her hips and settled down onto him, carefully, gently, warmly, and sighed softly in exhilarated pleasure. Joined, for the first time, and she was fairly certain she'd taken him for surprise but oh well. Didn't care, didn't care.

She grasped him, gently, firmly close, and whispered to him, "Make love to me, Graham."

Graham wrapped his arm around her tightly as she moved up to kiss him, exploring every crevice of her mouth as he did, and then he gasped in shock, almost biting her tongue in surprise as he felt her sliding down onto him. His eyes were huge, wide in his head, and his hand stroked over her cheek, her face, her forehead and her hair, then sliding down her arm to stroke over her hip and leg. "M'darlin, m'darlin, are ye sure this is what ye wan'? Ye dunna..." His protest was cut off as she started rolling her hips and pushing herself further onto him, and he cried out, his arm going to tighten around her waist as he pressed up, firmly, gently, pulling her down against him. "Aye, darlin', I'll love ye like I've been dreamin' ta."

"I love you." She whispered softly, wrapping her arm around his shoulder as she waited for him. "Get comfortable… anywhere you like. Want this… want...oh.." Big, twitching inside of her and she gave him a tight squeeze with her sheath, whimpering softly as her body exploded with lust and her fingers slid down, over the base of his cock and down to rub her clit. "Please, please Graham, hurry, can't...hurry, going to.." She shivered, then shuddered, body thrashing on his as her skin flushed and her nipples peaked even harder, rubbing against his chest as she whimpered in want.

"Willna ha'e t'wait anymore." Graham's arm was tight around her waist and he started rocking, lifting his hips up and thrusting into her, sliding out as he held her steady, pushing back up to sheathe himself deep inside. His arm pressed her down over his chest, prickly hair scraping against sensitive nipples, his pubic hair rubbing against her clit as he started moving her back and forth against his chest, the movement pushing her hips down further onto his cock with every stroke up into her sheath. His voice, when he grunted and spoke, had deepened to a hoarse, throaty growl, and his accent thickened even more.

"Lean back… back, against... here." She whispered it on a moan, pushing him back a little, a little more, then groaning softly as he got situated against the headboard, against the pillows, and he would be able to brace himself there without an arm as he made love to her. Her body was shaking, her fingers moving over his skin, and she kissed him, fiercely, hot and deep as they moved. She helped, thighs burning as she moved over him, whimpering in her quiet pleasure as her body squeezed and released, ached and held. She still wanted to touch him but they were both fumbling towards ecstasy. Their was time for touching, for exploration, after. She just made soft, whimpering noises as she moved, and it was the most glorious feeling she'd ever had.

She didn't know if he knew, doubted because like her, only a sixteenth of her brain was working, but he fit inside of her like he'd been born to. No pain for her, no nothing, just him inside like he was made to be there. His arm wrapped perfectly around her waist, her chest and belly fit to an aligned perfection against his chest and belly, and she whimpered again, saying it again, because she wanted to hear him. "I love you. I love you, Graham. I lov... love you."

Each whispered declaration brought a groan out of Graham's throat. He settled himself as she directed him, feeling the strain disappear from his arm, and pulled her harder and faster against his cock.

His mouth sought the crook of her neck, sucked and kissed there, trailed frantic bites up to her ear, and he pressed his mouth to it. "An' I love ye, m'darlin'. I've loved ye fer as long as I knew ye, and I canna imagine no' lovin' ye again." His arm tightened around her again, mouth moving to kiss her, softly, deeply, his cock stroking faster as he got closer. "Touch yersel', my darlin', s'close."

"So… so cl… oh… oh, G..." Her head tipped back to allow his kisses and she let out a sharp, hard wail. Her fingers slid down, over his belly and to her clit, which she began to rub frantically as her fingers came up to her breast and began to pinch and knead. She was in ecstasy, outrageous ecstasy, and she whimpered, loudly, shivering and shuddering as she worked over him. Her eyes were closed tight as she kept whimpering her words, over and over as they moved. "I love you, I love you, I love you so much, I love you, I love you."

Graham's hand moved from her waist to her hip, squeezing firmly, pulling her back down onto him. His chest was heaving as he panted for breath, sucking in deep lungfuls as he thrust up, inhaling the scent of their sex mingled together, and he shuddered, his cock giving a hard, frantic twitch inside of her as he pulled her down even harder, his fingers tight on her hip.

When he gave her a tug she swooped down, without thinking, and claimed his mouth for her own. Hot, slippery, close, close, CLOSE and she hadn't had an orgasm with a man in so long but it was coming, coming, and her body was flush with desire as she grasped onto his neck, panting as the hard, rhythmic slap of their bodies echoed. She felt too good to be self conscious, just riveted where she sat, over him, letting him have her and she him, and she rubbed her clit once, twice, three times, a swoop of pleasure sliding over her body... and then she came. She jerked, muscles locking as she gave a quiet, plaintive, soft cry of pleasure, her body spasaming with orgasm as she held him, held him.

The tight clench of her body around him, the throb of her sheath as she came, it shattered the last bit of self control he was holding onto. He came, harder and faster than he'd ever have liked, erupting like a volcano inside her as his seed spilled in her warm depths. He was grunting, hated it as he cradled her to his chest, sounding like a pig, but he couldn't help it. She was so tight, so warm around his cock that he couldn't help it, thrusting out the last of his orgasm as he held her tightly.

If only he knew. If only he understood, how those sounds made her shiver with delight, how she was spent, the first of what would be many orgasms this night. Finally. Finally they'd made love and it was perfect and beautiful and she panted hard against his shoulder, her muscles burning with the exertion she'd just done and uuuhn. She felt good, so good, his come inside, deep inside. "Inside me... you... are inside me." it was all she could think, awe and pleasure, as she rose her head enough to look at him… kiss him... then slump back down against his chest and pant for breath.

"Aye, darlin'. I am." His hand stroked over the back of her head, down her back and buttocks, back over her hip to end up at her shoulder. Long, full-body caresses that he loved to bestow on her. "I wouldna ever leave again, if I didna ha'e to."

"You do." She muttered, and lifted her head up, her eyes dancing. "When can we do it again?"

A long, drawn out groan. "Ha'e I said yet that yer gonna t'kill me?"

She smiled, then, and lifted up off of him with a sexy little back arch, sliding off of him and onto her butt, scooting back enough to lean down and draw his wet, dripping cock into her mouth.

Another hot groan slid out of his chest, but it was a languid heat this time, rather than the desperate need to possess that had flooded him before. "Def'netly gonna t'kill me, but I canna think of a better way to go," he gasped out between moans.

"Every time you stop... I wanna do it again." She whispered, sucking and licking until she could taste nothing but the smooth, velvety slide of him. "Every time you moan… I want you to keep doing it, never stop, never. You're so beautiful when you moan." She whispered, quietly, softly, continuing to lick as her fingertips stroked down his balls... down, further, over his little hole, and then back up without waiting for his reaction. She didn't want him to bolt, because she was too explorative, too quick, and she licked around the base of his cock, sucking softly and moaning in appreciation. She wanted again, and again, and again, and she was shivering with need as she brought his hand to her breast to touch her.

Graham gently kneaded the firm, heavy breast that was such a welcome, wonderful weight in his hand. He thumbed a hard nipple with long, careful strokes, squeezing the ripe flesh gently, pushing himself up to get a firmer grasp on it. He moved so that his palm cupped her nipple, fingers pressing and rubbing.

All it took was for him to touch her and she leaned up, wrapping her arms around his neck and holding him tight, as she lay her wet, hot valley against his still limp penis and began to rub, gentle, soft strokes as she slanted her mouth and kissed him. He wasn't excited like she was and she didn't quite know what to do, didn't know, didn't know. She gave him another warm, soft kiss, stopping her insistent stroking for more tender, deep kisses and licks, sucks and pleasures, overjoyed in the feeling of hot skin against hers. "Graham... sugar, I love you."

Graham reached up and cupped her face, feeling her strokes against him and between kisses, he rolled over to the table beside his bed, and held up the bottle of painkillers he was on. "Blame these things, m'darlin'. Barely get one good go out o'm'self since I started on these things." He kissed her again. "T'isna you."

She swallowed, softly, taking the pain killers from him. She knew exactly what they were, and the side effects they had, and she nodded, softly, reaching up to kiss his throat softly. "I won't push. Will you let me stay, the night?"

"Aye, darlin'." He rolled onto his side, keeping her plastered against his body. "T'was hopin' you would." He nuzzled against her throat softly, kissing and sucking. "Was hopin' y'wanted to."

"Want to." She whispered, softly. "I didn't..." Her throat worked. "I didn't push you tonight, did you? Did I take what I shouldn't have, Graham?"

He shook his head. "No, Toni. Didna take anythin'. I wanted it, much's you did. Didna ask, wasna gonna pressure ye inta anythin', but no, my darlin', ye didna take it."

"Then come here." She whispered it, softly. "Come here, to me." Her arms came up to gently touch his arms, tugging him close to her breast so he could lay down. The lamp light glowed a lovely warm golden hue, and she closed her eyes, leaning her cheek against his head softly, her fingers stroking down his hairy cheek. "Thank you."

Graham snuggled in as close to her as he could, cast cradled carefully out of the way, and he breathed in the sweet smell of her skin. "Dinna have anythin' to thank me for, darlin'," Graham said softly.

"Thank you." She repeated, quietly, stroking a hand through his hair as petite legs kicked the blankets up and over them...his body, long and big, hers, tiny and small, and she brought him in closer to her, arms wrapping around his shoulders and neck.

His good arm looped over her waist, snuggling her close against his body, curving her against his flat planes, belly to belly, and her legs on top of his as he stroked her flank under the sheets. "It's s'good t'have ye back here, darlin'."

She didn't say anything for a long moment. "What time is Shayla bringing Shaney back?"

"In th'mornin', before school," he said against her shoulder.

"I have to go to work at five thirty." She answered back, quietly, letting out a soft yawn as she did it. "I don't want him to get scared, or not to understand why I'm here."

Heavy yawn from Graham, and he snuggled in closer. "Shaney's an amazin' baby, darlin'. Dunna think it'll upset him, ye bein' here."

"He's a beautiful baby." Toni murmured, quietly. "Go to sleep, sugar bear. I'm here, now. Go on to sleep."

His eyes flickered open for a brief moment. "Dunna be surprised... if ye hear me wakin' up. Bin... Bin havin' nightmares, wakin' up inna cold sweat."

Her eyebrows furrowed, and she pressed a kiss into his hair. "Of what, sugar? What nightmares?"

"I dunna remember," he said softly, and it was the truth. "I just wake up in cold sweat, tossin' and turnin'."

"Well I'm here now, sugar bear." She whispered, softly, and kissed his hair again before turning more onto her side, snuggling to his pine smelling pillows, and bringing him close. "I'll protect you from the big bad wolf."

He laughed softly, and took another deep breath of her scent, snuffling her skin gently. "I hope the wolf dunna come now that yer here wi'me." His arm was tight around her, pulled close, snuggled tight. "Havena felt this calm inna while."

"You taste so good." She whispered, softly, her only admission. "You taste good...you smell good. When... when you're ready, we can do it the right way. I just... I hope I didn't push you into it, or make a fool outta myself tonight."

"Y'didna do either." He pushed himself up so their faces were level, and he looked her in the eye. "Dunna worry, m'darlin'. Ye dinna make a fool outta yerself, and ye didna take anythin' I didna wan'ye t'have."

She gazed into deep brown eyes, the laugh wrinkles surrounding them, beautiful eyes that were hers, and stroked over his chin and jaw softly. "I came here to break it off with you. Earlier. I came to break up with you, because you wouldn't let me be a part of your life. I'm sorry, Graham. I want… to stay with you, I want... to be with you. I just need you. I'm sorry for being so horrible."

"I knew why ye came," he said softly. "Wasna goin' t'let ye go. I'm s'glad ye decided not t'leave me." he buried his face back against her shoulder, let his beard scrape her skin. "I need ye too, my darlin'."

"Will you ever forgive me? For having...this baby?"

He sighed against her skin. "Of course, m'darlin'."

"No... Graham. I mean..." She reached her fingers down for his, gently brought his face up. "I mean, really forgive me."

"Aye, I know what ye mean." His fingers dropped down to stroke over her stomach. "And I'll forgive yea t the end of nine months, when you're alive and safe in m'arms."

"After that, you'll kick my ass?"

Soft chuckle into soft skin. "Up one side o'the road and back down t'other."

She smiled, then, and gently rubbed her hands over his shoulders as she held him close. "Does this mean you'll go see your brother tomorrow?"

"No, it doesna." Graham held her tightly. "No' quite ready t'see him yet."

"He misses you." She answered, quietly. "He's a wreck, with the preparations."

"He bloody well should be." Graham growled it. "T'isna my problem."

Her eyebrow came up. "He's your baby brother. Don't tell me you don't love him as much as you love your own self."

"Aye, I do. He's m'brother and aye, I love 'im more'n my life, but that doesna mean I dinna want t'kick his arse back to Cobh."

"Of course you do. But... talk to him, first, sugar bear." She smiled, then. "For now... got any ice cream?"

Chuckle as he rolled onto his back then. "Aye, there's rocky road in th'freezer. Canna remember if it's opened or not, but it's down there for ye."

"I'm not joking though, Graham." Toni whispered, as she rolled onto her side beside him, pressing her lips tenderly against his cast for a moment, as she stroked her fingers down to the fingers in it. "Don't mess up. You've got a good family, sugar."

"I know yer not jokin', Toni." He kissed her shoulder, as she kissed his hand. "And I'm no' jokin' either. I'm just no' ready to deal wi'm'brother."

A little sigh, and she nodded, quietly, as she rolled to her feet and slipped into his flannel shirt, not bothering to button it up. "Want anything?"

He shook his head. "Just you, back fast as y'can."

"Alright, be back in a jiff." She padded quietly through the bedroom and slipped out, quickly slipping down the steps.

 

-fin-

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