The Memoirs

For exactly one second, Bruce had the misfortune in seeing what Lex saw in Clark, and it nauseated him.

The sun was preparing to set in the sky, a fireball of red and yellow, purple and blue. The land was covered in late evening orange light, and it was...pleasant, where he'd set himself up. That is, he was sitting on the porch of his home, watching Clark and Dick riding horses. Dick looked gorgeous sitting on his horse, all broad shoulders, long legs and quirked smile. But if Dick looked gorgeous Clark looked magnificent, long hair curled around his neck, lean waist and broad shoulders and stone-hard thighs holding for dear life onto the horse.

Beautiful.

And it disgusted him.

He took a sip of his toddy to get the taste out of his mouth, curling more comfortably under the blanket into the rocking chair, and sighed.

"Blanket hog," Lex accused, yanking his half of the blanket back as he sat in the chair beside Bruce, sharing the over-sized quilted comforter.

Bruce glared at him and tugged back, but only half heartedly. The swing they were sitting on was perfect for two, rocking gently back and forth, as Dick and Clark's laugh carried over the expanse between the fenced in pen and the house.

"Glare at me all you want to, doesn't change the fact that you're hoggin' the blankets," Lex groused, and tugged back, just as half-heartedly. "Feeling better than you were this morning?"

If Lex had to ask that, then he wasn't aware of the full scale brood Bruce was still in. He glared again. "No."

More like he was ignoring the Bruce Brood, as he was skilled at doing. "Are you at least feeling like letting me in on what's eating you?"

"No," Bruce said again, voice deep and gravely from not using it barely at all today.

Lex reached over and poked his friend in the shoulder. "Eventually you're going to have to."

"Oh, am I," Bruce deadpanned.

"Yes, you are, because if not, you're going to have to explain to me why my finding my lifemate bugs the hell out of you so much, and you're going to have to explain to me why we aren't going to be friends because of Clark," Lex said plainly. "Maybe Smallville has spoiled me, Bruce, or maybe I've just been hanging around Chloe too long, but I kind of expect my friends to tell me when they're pissed off, and why."

Jealous fury welled in Bruce's chest and he remained silent, stoic, gazing out at the two men trying to learn how to make the horses do what they wanted. Clark had taken to it like a pro, while Dick was still struggling the smallest bit. He didn't answer Lex, at least not right away, because he couldn't... he didn't know why he was acting like this. It was a bit disconcerting, actually.

"Fine. I take your silence to mean that we're not going to be friends any longer. So as soon as Clark and I are back in Metropolis, I'll find a safe place to stow the suits and send for them, and I'll talk to my father about disentangling Wayne Enterprises and LexCorp, at the least, and possibly LuthorCorp as well if you no longer want to be associated with my family. Furthermore, if you'll let me know what the rental of this property is, I'll reimburse you for the two days we've been occupied here as well as any other additional fees you deem necessary to levy." Lex pushed the blanket off his legs as he stood up and started walking towards the short staircase that led to the ground.

Bruce didn't want to go after him. His pride almost wouldn't allow it. Instead, he said aloud, "Don't blackmail me, Lex."

"Get it through your stubborn skull, Bruce. I'm not blackmailing you. I'm just finally getting around to demanding from you what you've always demanded from me--honesty. Even when I haven't wanted to be honest with you or myself for that matter, you've demanded it from me and made me face up to some rather ugly things." He shoved his hands in his pockets as he turned around and leaned against the porch rail, ankles crossed. "I've finally grown up enough to demand the same thing from you, and you're not willing to give that to me."

The only thing was, honesty could cost Bruce everything, including the one thing he treasured above all else--Dick. If he was honest, the foundations of who he was just might shake apart. He couldn't afford that, not now, not after everything had finally settled, after he found a reason to live in his lover. If he was honest, he could destroy it all.

*All*.

And if he didn't, Bruce knew Lex enough to know Lex would do everything in his power to destroy all bonds, business included. It could ruin him.

Bruce buried his face in his hands.

Lex sighed, and went to sit back in the rocking swing beside his friend. "I'm not out to ruin you," Lex said softly, in answer to the thoughts that simply blared through his brain, so strongly was Bruce thinking them. "I just want you to be honest with me, for once. And if you can't be, after *everything* we've been through, then maybe we shouldn't be friends anymore," he continued. "If you can't trust me because of who I'm with... then that's going to be the end of it, because I'm not going to ever *not* be with Clark. He and I are always going to be together, Bruce, always." He reached out and took one of Bruce's hands in his. "But as long as you can be open with me, I can keep walking the tightrope. But if you can't be open with me, then you're going to force me into making a choice."

Bruce couldn't look at him. He just... he couldn't, even as Lex took his hand. Lex didn't get it. Didn't understand what saying it out loud would do to him. But he loved Lex, he couldn't.... selfish, he was selfish and he couldn't lose him. He didn't know what he could say to Lex to keep Lex from leaving and keep himself from falling apart. He loved Dick, he loved Dick so very much. Dick hasd given up everything for him, loved him, and Bruce was devoted to him.

The jealousy was agony.

And he didn't know how he could say it and not lose either of these two men he loved so much. "Please, Lex."

Lex didn't say anything, just squeezed Bruce's hand tightly. "You've got a choice to make, Bruce, and whatever choice you make is going to dictate a lot of things from here on out. I understand who you are, because I knew you when you were *becoming* and I know you don't do the open up and talk thing on a regular basis, but I am asking you, as your friend, to do it now, because if you don't, you're going to make me choose." He squeezed tighter. "And if it comes down to choosing between my best friend and the man who has had my son and lost him? It's *going* to be Clark."

Bruce swallowed convulsively. "Don't make me do this. Lex, I can't. Do you understand?" The fear of losing Dick was so great, so overwhelming, it nearly closed his throat. "I can't lose him. I can't." *And if I tell you what's on my mind, I will.*

*No you won't,* Lex inserted smoothly, in response to the panicked thoughts in Bruce's mind. "I understand," he said verbally. "More, maybe, than you know. But I still love you, Bruce. You're my best friend in the entire world. And I know that I'm hurting you with this situation, and I don't know why. And I don't want to hurt my friend."

Bruce closed his eyes. He wanted to blurt it all out, but he stopped himself. If he was going to do this, he was going to do it as a man. He couldn't speak it, but.. "I can't say it. But you can look in, and see it," he said, and very, very carefully let the tension from his mind free. He hoped to God Lex understood why he couldn't speak it aloud.

Lex let go of Bruce's hand and raised it to gently cup his friend's cheek as he focused on the black thread that connected him to Bruce. Carefully, quietly, he built little safety walls for Bruce's peace of mind, so that he could know that Clark wasn't getting free access to his mind, and that Lex was going to protect what he found as he prodded the little link.

Hot jealousy. Jealousy that Clark had Lex and Bruce didn't. Angry that Clark had been the one to finally calm Lex down and not him; worry because Clark was so different and was changing Lex so much from the sweet little boy that he'd known back in Excelsior. More jealousy that Clark had been the reason for that change, when Bruce had tried so hard to do it himself.

Confusion, because Dick was his lover and yet Bruce wanted to possess Lex entirely, head to doe, take him back and protect him.

Lex slowly leaned forward and pressed a kiss on Bruce's forehead as he pulled his hand away, and sat back in the chair, gasping softly as he tried to catch his breath. He still hadn't quite gotten the hang of using those abilities without losing half his energy, but he was getting there.

"Can you tell me why?" is all he asked.

Bruce looked away, inexplicably finding himself as emotional as he'd ever been, at least since he found Dick in Smallville so many months ago. He couldn't speak for a moment, watching the boys on the horses laughing and riding together, and though Clark was looking at them with a puzzled expression he was the least of Bruce's worries right now.

He didn't speak for a moment, but when he did, his voice was a croak. "It's only been recently."

"You don't have to be jealous," Lex said softly, knowing it was very much useless--Bruce would feel the way he wanted. "You know that you'll always have a part of me."

Empty words for what he was feeling, and he stood abruptly, turning into the house with his empty cup and the blanket.

"Bruce, do you want to make love to me?" he asked to his friend's departing back.

Bruce jerked all over.

The cup slipped from his fingers, smashing against the wood.

Did he want to? God, yes. YES. And it nearly destroyed everything he felt for Dick. Even now, the guilt would keep him from touching his lover. Dick would know, would ask why, and when Bruce told him, as he told his lover everything, their relationship would be over.

He closed his eyes.

Lex got up from the swing, and touched his friend's back. "I have... I have an idea what is happening," he said softly. "Let me talk to Clark this evening." A gentle rub to Bruce's shoulder. "Do you trust me, Bruce?"

Bruce was beginning to tremble. "Don't you dare. Don't you fucking dare. Don't you tell him about this."

A horrible nightmare litany of images crossed his minds eye--Clark smirking, going to tell Dick, Dick screaming at him, hating him, yelling at him, leaving him and being alone, being alone.

Lex's fingers tightened on Bruce's shoulders. "*Trust* me," he said. "I won't tell him anything. I just need to talk to him about something, and I will talk to you tonight once I've gotten an answer."

Bruce looked up, misery written across every line of his body. "I can't stop you," was all he said, and he turned into the house, walking off down the hall.

*I wish you would trust me again,* Lex sent to his friend. *I would never betray you like that.* And then he looked to Clark, who was managing his horse easily, and met his lover's eyes. *We need to talk,* he sent Clark through his link.

- = - = -

Clark was a little worried. Well, mostly because he'd been having fun with his horse, and then Lex's distressed words coming to him over their link, and he had instantly been worried. A million thoughts flew through his head, but he trusted his aushna' enough to know that something was truly wrong if he wanted to talk to him about Bruce Wayne of all people.

So, after he helped stable the horses, talked to the stable hand and finally got cleaned up, an hour had passed and he was starved. He and Lex were currently ensconced in their bedroom, eating together at the little table by the beautiful double doors that led to the wrap-around porch around the house.

In that hour, Lex had slipped into a brood that, if Bruce had seen it, he would have been proud of. He'd brooded his way through a half a bottle of vodka, two phone calls that he hadn't bothered to answer, and a shitload of questions that he was going to have to ask his aushna'.

Most of them revolving around the timing, their recently renewed desire to have kids, and how it would affect their sha'nauch.

He was pushing the food on his plate around, letting Clark eat in peaceful, uninterrupted silence as he took the chance to brood even more.

Clark wasn't dumb. He knew something was plaguing Lex's thoughts, but he also knew Lex would tell him when he was good and ready. So he ate his dinner--enough for three men, but he was Clark, here--and drank two glasses of orange juice before he finally leaned back in his chair, sighed, and said, "Wanna tell me what's wrong with you, now?"

Lex's fingers were steepled in front of his mouth. "Tell me, Clark... how long before our people have children do they pick sha'nauch?"

"How long?" Clark frowned, thinking a moment. "I'm not quite sure. I mean, the whole topic of sha'nauch kind of took me off guard myself...I didn't even know Shayla would enter the picture until I saw her after John was born. So... I'm not really quite sure. I know that Chloe was about midway through her pregnancy when I began to notice Shay, though."

That only brought up a new crop of questions to ask Shayla later. "How long before Mar did we really claim Chloe and Whitney?" was his next question, and even he himself didn't have a really exact firm idea of that, because of the entire trauma that had surrounded Mar-El's birth gave him a great fuzziness around the corners.

Clark tipped his head, thoughtfully. "I'm not sure. I had Mar on my birthday. We claimed Chloe and Whitney...it was before the holidays, wasn't it? October or so? Before thanksgiving?" He frowned thoughtfully, sipping his juice.

"No, it was after that," Lex said. "It was..." He blinked. "It was Christmas Eve. Because you and I had hidden in my office while the rest of the clan gathered, and Marie went into labor. It was right before Dad's accident, which was Christmas Day."

Clark nodded, frowning. "A month before Mar was born." He sat back a little. "Why are you asking, Lex? What does it matter? They're our sha'nauch."

"Yes, they are, and the way it happened was clouded by the red Kryptonite. And while I know that they are the ones we'd have claimed any way you look at it, I was simply wondering if our sha'nauch would have had any prior indication of it, or if you knew ahead of time."

Clark frowned. "I'm not sure. I... I mean, Whitney's always been...." he cleared his throat. "You know. Even when I was dating Lana, I always... you know." He blushed hot. "And Chloe, too. She always liked me though, I mean, as more than a friend, but I never… noticed. Until... Halloween or so."

Lex sat back in the chair again, thoughts whirring as he kept his fingers steepled in front of his lips. "Always. Four months. Christ." A deep sigh, and he wanted to tell Clark, but he didn't want to betray Bruce. "Have you... noticed anything different about Dick?"

Clark shrugged, blushing again. "Whitney's always been beautiful to me, but I never really... noticed it till October." He shifted. "Noticed anything about Dick? Only that he's looking good these days. The life of a super hero agrees with him," Clark said, a flashing grin on his face. "I'll bet Bruce puts him through a work out and a half though."

"Yeah, I think he does," Lex said absently. "Both physically and otherwise." He was still very, very unhappy with the conclusion that he was coming to, even as he stroked Bruce's thread with all the confidence he could muster.

Clark tipped his head, giving his lover a look over. "Why are you asking, Lex? Not that I'm not used to your weird conversations," he teased, eyes dancing. "But what's up?"

"I promised Bruce that I wouldn't say anything to you until I talked to him tonight," Lex said softly.

"Bruce?" Clark's heart dropped to his knees and nausea turned his stomach. He swallowed the smallest bit, tipping his head and frowning all the deeper. "What does Bruce have to do with this, aushna'?"

"I'm... worried about him Clark. Based on some of the things he told me today," is all Lex said.

Clark's limbs were trembling. It was simple to put two and two together. Sha'nauch, time frame, Shayla, the one year anniversary of their baby's death four months away, and suddenly talk of Bruce and Dick.

Clark began to shake. "No. What are you trying to say, aushna'?"

"I think that since we've begun to talk about having another child, we've--I've, probably--begun to subconsciously affect those who we'll choose as guardians of our family."

Clark's fingers tightened into twin fists under the table. His fury knew no bounds, but his voice was very, very calm. "What did Bruce tell you, Lex?"

Lex shook his head. "I'm not going to tell you, Clark. I promised Bruce that I wouldn't; he's already afraid that I'll tell you, and you'll use it to destroy his relationship with Dick in retaliation for what he's done to you."

Clark didn't have to hear it from Lex. He didn't have to hear it, because he already knew. The fury in his soul unleashed and he snarled, standing so quickly the chair fell back. The thought of... of *him* being his sha'nauch made him snarl, so hard the walls almost vibrated, and far from human. He was *radiating* anger, from the tips of his fingers to the tips of his toes. Not because of Bruce's fear that he'd tell Dick.

But because Bruce and Dick were going to be their sha'nauch.

His skin crawled and he shuddered, furious, stalking the room.

Lex jumped slightly when Clark snarled and started to pace, and then glared at his lover quietly. "It's what I think, isn't it, Clark?" he asked softly.

Clark glared furiously at him. The thought of Bruce *touching* his aushna' made him snarl all the louder, fists tightening and loosening so hard that he was sure he could have crushed diamonds between them. He jerked and stalked the room, back and forth.

Lex stayed calm in the face of his aushna's anger, sending as much calm as he possessed through their link. "Calm yourself," he murmured softly. "There are worse things than having someone you trust."

"You will *not* tell me what to do, Oakenepel," Clark roared, pointing furiously at him. "You are *my* aushna' and I will not calm if I do not wish to!" He turned and continued pacing furiously.

"Yes, I am your aushna'," Lex said, climbing to his feet. "I am your aushna', I am the father of your child, the mate of your soul. I am ashimel to Whitney and Chloe, and to Shayla, and being that does not lessen what I am to you. Being ashimel to Bruce will not lessen what I am to you either."

"Yes it will," Clark snarled. Everything would change if--*when, not if,* his mind whispered--Bruce and Dick became their aushna'. *Everything* would change, and Clark couldn't let it. Not after he'd finally grown comfortable. To top it off, he wouldn't let Bruce and Dick be his sha'nauch to take care of his *child*. His child! The baby he'd bear from his body! No. *No*.

"How?" Lex questioned, still remaining calm in the face of his aushna's fury, channeling as much love and soothing feeling as he could through their link to protect him. "How will Bruce becoming ashimel, guardian of our child, change what I am to you?" he demanded.

"Because! Because he will finally see you as I see you, and you will… you... it will change!" Clark roared. "It will change, all of it will change! HE WON'T HAVE YOU!"

"Will you take me from Chloe and Whitney as well?" he asked calmly. "Hide your aushna' away like something you are ashamed to have?"

Clark was vibrating, he was so mad. His skin was flushed hot, green eyes molten, hands clenched so tight they were white knuckled. "HOW DARE YOU!" He roared. "I AM NOT ASHAMED OF YOU!"

"If you are not ashamed of me, why do you not wish to share what *we* are together with those who will become our sha'nauch?" Lex asked quietly.

Because Clark already knew what would happen. As much as he hated Bruce, he didn't think he could take watching him fuck his aushna'. The very thought made him ill, horrified to find tears leaping to his eyes, and even worse, to feel his dinner in his throat. "They are *not* our sha'nauch."

"But they will be, won't they?"

"*No*." Oh. Oh, yes, they would be. Clark already felt it, already knew it. It filled him with joy, because that meant they'd be having a child soon. But it also filled him with profound dread and sorrow, to imagine what would happen, if… if..

"If what?" Lex asked. "If Bruce comes to our bed? You will be the alpha, as you always are. He will respect you as my aushna', as his ashimel, he will know what you have and he cannot."

No. This time, Clark wasn't going to crack with soft words and pretty gray eyes. No. There had to be some way to stop this. He'd fight it with every ounce of his being, if that's what it took. He was a very stubborn man, he could do it. He glared furiously at the wall. "No. NO."

"Then we'll talk to your father when we get home. See if there is a way to stop the selection of sha'nauch. Transfer it to someone else--my father and Dominic, perhaps, though neither of them will accept us as they should; we are sons to them but we will see."

Clark jerked and he pointed at Lex. "Do you want him in your bed, then? Is that it, Kenep? Do you wish for him to share your bed?"

Lex refused to get angry, and tried not to let himself be hurt. "No, Kal. I have no wish to have Bruce in my bed. He is my friend, and nothing more."

This was the worst thing that had happened to them. Ever. In that moment Clark felt so utterly betrayed by his own race. This wasn't fair, it wasn't *fair* because he hated Bruce so, so very much, but the link, it would... their relationship would force him to do what his heart didn't want. He'd never feel comfortable being with his sha'nauch again, not *ever* and he trembled. "I don't want this."

"We will talk to your father," Lex said again. "We will see what can be done to change the choice to my father instead."

He wasn't stupid. He knew Lex was hurt and upset by what Clark had said, but he couldn't take it back even if he'd tried. Instead he turned and pulled the sheets down on their bed.

But he wasn't going to apologize. Not for this. God only knew what Bruce had told Lex this afternoon. "You can tell Bruce that I'm not going to tell Dick anything."

"I'm sure he'll be glad to know that. I'll tell him the truth, and that you intend to change it, and that the feelings should be going away if we can achieve it." He watched Clark turn down the bed, and couldn't quite bring himself to get into it. "I'm going to talk to him now, and try and reassure him."

"Did you *want* him to be our sha'nauch?" Clark asked jerkily, tugging his shirt off.

"No, Clark, I didn't. Because despite my trust for him, I know you can't stand him, and he doesn't like you very much either. I wouldn't subject either of the people I care about the most to something like this." Yes, the implication hurt, but he hid it well.

Clark felt it. Lex didn't have to say it for Clark to feel it, and not only did he hate Bruce more than words could express in that moment, he also felt incredibly bad. So, so bad. "Lex, I'm not being unreasonable. I just... I can't. Not him. Anyone but him."

"I understand, Clark." He didn't. But that didn't matter. He accepted it, because Clark was his priority. "Like I've said, we'll speak to your father, and we'll take whatever measures we have to so that we can change this. If necessary, I'm more than willing to let you and your father put me under again, and see if you can find a way to sever the connection that I have with Bruce, and see if that will help to affect the choice."

Clark stared at Lex for a moment. Sat down on the edge of the bed. And burst into tears.

He knew there'd be no way to change it. He could feel Dick and Bruce both, nagging at his subconscious, in the back of his mind but when he *concentrated* he could just...feel them. He felt them, and he knew it was too late to change it, and he just... he wept. Bitterly. "Oh, God," he whispered.

Lex crossed the room and sat on the bed beside his aushna', arms going around his shoulders. "Sssh. Don't. Don't get upset. We'll call your father right now, if you'd like. I've got my cell phone, we don't even have to use Bruce's phone. We can call and talk to your father, and find out what we can do."

"Don't… touch me right now," Clark whispered, and after shrugging Lex off, he curled up on the bed and closed his eyes. "My father can't change fate, Lex. He can't move mountains. Don't you understand? There's nothing we can do to change it."

Lex pulled back as if he'd been burned. He got up and picked up his cellphone, and tossed it onto the bed. "Call your father. I'm going to talk to Bruce, and I'll be back. Tell me what your father said when I return, and we'll take whatever steps we need to."

Clark took the phone and turned, curling up on his side.

"Don't worry, Clark. I'll find a way to take care of this." Lex didn't wait for an answer, because he knew one wouldn't be forthcoming. He just closed the door and leaned his head against it, sighing deeply as he mentally girded himself for speaking to Bruce.

Said Bruce was, at the moment, sitting in front of the fireplace. Dick had gone to bed early when he'd seen the mood he was in, and Bruce couldn't find it in himself to feel badly. Mostly because he was three quarters inebriated.

Lex just pushed himself off the bedroom door, down the half-flight of stairs, and down the rest of the hallway until he came to the great room.

And sighed, as he leaned against the wall.

"You know, Bruce, that's supposed to be my trick, drinking my problems to hell," he pointed out casually.

Bruce said nothing. If possible, when he was drunk? He brooded even *more*.

"I didn't say anything to Clark. But we need to talk, Bruce. And we need to talk now."

Bruce looked up. Hiccupped. "The seat's always free. Next to me. I mean. Sitting. You can."

"And you need to stop drinking." Lex sat down on the floor beside Bruce, and took the bottle away. "Tell me when you feel sober enough to listen."

"I'm sober," Bruce muttered. Truthfully, he wasn't, but he had always been able to hold his drink. Not that he wanted to, but still.

"I sincerely doubt that." Lex carefully corked the bottle and set it out of his friend's reach. "I know why you've been feeling the way you've been feeling."

"Cause 'm sick?"

"No." Lex raised a hand and pushed surprisingly messy bangs out of Bruce's eyes. "Because you and Dick are connected to Clark and I... probably because of me. But you and Dick are going to be chosen as our sha'nauch, Bruce. If Clark and I don't find a way to stop it."

"Sha who?" he cleared his throat. "Quit your inane blabbering, Luthor, and leave me to my bottle. Haven't you had enough tonight? Haven't you taken enough from me? What more would you like, my bloody heart ripped from my chest? I gave you everything. What more could you possibly want?"

"Sha'nauch," Lex repeated softly. "Unlike Chloe and Whitney, who were chosen for Clark and I... you and Dick will be chosen as guardians of my son," he said, still in the same, quiet voice. "You, Bruce, would be mine, in the sense that you would be drawn to me more than you would be to Clark."

Bruce just... stared at the man at his feet. Stared. Took another long drink from his glass. Stared a little more. "You've gone crazy, haven't you? Why didn't you just tell me, Lex, I could have helped you, saved you somehow. He did it, didn't he?" he asked suddenly. "He did it, connected us."

"No," Lex said. "I did it. Because you are the closest thing to family I had for a very long time. You were always in my heart, Bruce. And when I bonded with Clark, and it woke my abilities up, I was the one who connected you to us, and if I had known that I did it, or if I had known this would happen, I would have severed it a long time ago." He let his hand fall from Bruce's face. "I don't need saving."

"Yes you do," Bruce muttered, head lolling. Maybe he was a little more drunk than he'd thought, because his tongue... was very loose. "Always need saving. You're too gentle and beautiful for *brutes* like him and me. Hah. Brutes. Like my name!" He coughed. "Though he has a nice ass. Very nice ass," he muttered, eyes falling closed.

Lex gave a small smile at that. "You're not a brute, Bruce. And neither is Clark. And yes, he does have a nice ass."

Bruce's head lolled again. "He does. Does he fuck nice too?"

"Yes, he does, though he'd be incensed that I'm telling you," Lex said with twitching lips. "He did promise, though, that he would say nothing to Dick."

"That's good. Cause I love Dick. I love Dick lots and lots. Did you know? He keeps me from getting this drunk when I'm not being a total *prick* to him. He said I should sleep on the couch, because I have bad drunk breath." At that Bruce looked a little sad, but then he brightened. "If we become your sha-whatever, will we fuck?"

"Yes, if you become sha'nauch with us, you and Dick will be sleeping with both Clark and I. It's... rather complicated at the moment, but I'll explain more when you're sober."

"I don't want that ape man touching Dick," Bruce muttered, eyes closing again. He opened them a minute later, slightly more lucid, and said, "I love you. Lots, you know."

"And Clark doesn't want you touching me, so you're both even on that score." He met Bruce's eyes with a little smile. "I know you do, Bruce. And you know that I will always love you."

"Good. Now leave'a man to his peace," Bruce muttered, closing his eyes and leaning his head back against the back of the couch.

"To stop this connection, Bruce, I may have to sever my connections with you," Lex said softly.

"You won't have to," Clark said from the door.

He looked a mess. His face was streaked and splotchy, his curls sticking up everywhere, his clothes wrinkled. He held the cell phone in hand. "There's no way to stop it. My father just...we talked. There's no way. It..." his throat was tight. "It also means my body is beginning to… um, get ready. Spring time is when… it's... most... fertile." He looked away, splotchy color over his face.

Lex dropped a light kiss on Bruce's forehead as he went over to stand in front of Clark. "Your father is wrong, Clark. There will be a way. You went into my head and excised the connections of Alexis. You can do the same thing with me. You can excise my connection with Bruce, and then your father can guide me through severing whatever connections you've begun to form."

Clark shook his head, eyes wide and glassy. "He said I'd have to want it. But I… I don't," he croaked, throat closing. "He said I have to fear for the life of my child for it to work. I don't, not... not with.."

He closed his eyes and set the phone in Lex's hand.

Lex took the phone and put it in his back pocket. "You don't think that Bruce is a danger to our child," he finished softly.

Clark shook his head. He knew the implications of that.

He also knew the implications of talking in a hallway.

He opened his eyes briefly and looked in on Bruce, three sheets to the wind that he was, and he didn't feel hate, or anger. He felt... something different. He swallowed against it. "Lets get him to bed."

"Go clean up," Lex ordered softly. "Don't worry about Bruce; I'll be responsible for taking care of him. Dick's already told him to sleep on the couch tonight because of the drunk."

Clark nodded, wiping his face, and just because he could, he leaned over to kiss him. "I'm sorry I was horrible."

Lex kissed him back softly. "You don't have to apologize; I understand what a bad situation this is for you. And I won't give up until it's fixed."

Clark just squeezed Lex's arm softly, and left.

 

-fin-

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