The Memoirs

CK just shook his head as he got in the elevator with Kal, still not saying anything as he squeezed back.

"I'm not alright, either, baby." Kal said softly, as he squeezed CK's fingers and kissed the back of his hand. "They'll be good to you, better than good. I promise you that. Just stay with me, okay? Don't go."

CK nodded in agreement. "Won't go," he said softly, and just didn't say anything else as he stayed close to Kal.

Kal didn't say anything else as the elevator stopped on the floor they were supposed to enter. Dominic was standing in the doorway, waiting for them, and his face looked... so sad. As if he understood, in a way. Kal ignored it, like he ignored everything else, and walked in with CK when Dominic moved out of the way.

"Take the bedroom. Lionel and I are leaving as soon as you're both settled in and Lex is back." Dominic murmured gently, as he closed and locked the door behind him.

"Lex went... to see Pete and Shay," CK said, as though he was fighting to get the words out without screaming. "I don't... know when he'll be back. You can go, if you want. We'll be okay."

"We'll stay." Dominic said softly as he stepped before them. "Want something to drink? Some juice or soda or something?"

Kal shook his head without a word, even as his eyes flickered to CK. "Get some juice, baby. Orange juice is what you want, right? Go get some. I'll get the bed turned down."

CK shook his head. "Not thirsty," he said quietly, and stayed closer to Kal. "I just want Kenep."

"Alright, then. Lionel's in the back office, loves. Go on to bed, alright? We'll be gone in a bit. If you need me, I'll be in the living room, okay?" He gently squeezed CK's shoulder.

"You can go now," CK repeated again. "You don't have to stay. Kal can take care of me."

"I know he can. But we'll stay, anyway." Dominic murmured, as he gently motioned towards the bedroom. "Go. I don't think I can stand another fight. Go get some rest."

"Wouldn't have been a fight if he didn't fucking mess with me." Kal muttered back at him, hating how completely docile and gentle Dominic's face was as he tugged on CK's hand and strolled across the living room.

CK nodded at Dominic and let Kal pull him across the room behind him, staying almost in the same skin as they did, and he was still quiet.

- = - = -

It was some time before he had CK calmed down. They changed into warm pajama clothes, turned down the thick blankets and sheets, clean and sweet, and climbed between them. Kal stroked CK's shower-damp hair for a long time, calming him down with gentle, easy movements as tender as the breeze. The alarm clock near the bed said almost one in the morning then, before CK's breaths grew quiet and even. Kal carefully climbed from the bed, tucking his beautiful other in close into the pillows and sheets, before he went looking in one corner of the room, where there was a small fridge. He found a tall bottle of scotch sitting on the elegant shelf above the fridge, and took it, a glass, and one of the packs of cigarettes sitting beside all the bottles.

He opened the window, not the one that faced the city but the one that faced the back of the house, and climbed out on the fire escape, before up, his treasures tucked in his arms.

Lionel hadn't gone to sleep yet, though he knew that he should have. Couldn't quite bring himself to care, though, at the moment, as he heard the rattling around in the living room, then along the outside of the apartment.

He sighed, deeply, wondering why in the name of Christ he was doing this, but he got up from his comfortable chair in front of the small fireplace, closing his laptop as he got to his feet, and found the window in the main room open. He sighed, angling his torso out and muttering. "I am too old for this shit." He slammed the window closed and walked out of the apartment, following the hallway to the end and opening the roof access door. He climbed the two flights of stairs, muttering under his breath about the incomprehensible stupidity of the young, and pushed the door to the roof open as he looked around.

Wasn't hard to spot the only redhead on the roof. "I might have known it was you."

Kal didn't say a word. He'd climbed up onto the side of the building, his legs dangling down at the traffic. Had his scotch bottle open, though he hadn't poured anything yet, and was taking the first long, delicious puff of his cigarette. Something he'd never told any of the Luthors, but he and Pete had been addicted to the little pieces of shit freshman year, and the first bite of nicotine was wonderful.

"You'll smoke those cheap cigarettes, and you refuse the cigars? I do not understand you, boy, not at all." Lionel's feet crunched on the gravel as he wove around the small rooftop garden and lowered slightly creaking bones to sit on the edge as well. "At least you have good taste in beverages."

Yeah, right. Like it was okay for him to talk to him. Kal ignored him again as he poured a glass of the scotch into the glass, handing it to Lionel without looking at him, and took a long chug from the bottle itself. It burned like battery acid all the way down, and he hissed, deeply, before swallowing twice and sighing.

"Thank you." Lionel downed the drink quickly, and set the empty glass on the gravel behind them. "Shall I badger you further, or will you give the both of us a break and tell me what, precisely, is on your mind?"

"Go back and sit with Dominic. He misses you." Was all Kal said, as he took another long drag from the cigarette and swigged another drink at the same time, before he refilled Lionel's glass.

"Dominic is, at the moment, asleep, as we are waiting for Lex to decide to return," Lionel said calmly.

"Peachy." He muttered, and looked out at the dark sky, the skitter of stars barely peeking through Metropolis' smog. People were so fucking stupid... why were they so destructive? They had such a beautiful place to live in, and they took such poor care of it. He sighed, quietly, legs hooking ankle over ankle as he shifted.

Lionel said nothing for a moment, reaching into his pocket and pulling out a cigar, lighting it, and studying the flickering flame of the platinum-cased Zippo before snapping it closed and putting it back in his pocket. "Yes," he said abruptly, out of the blue.

Kal ignored him for a moment… before stopping, and looking at him. "Excuse me?"

"You asked me a question earlier, and I never answered you," he said, with a bit of a smile. "The answer is yes."

"What question?" His brow furrowed, darkly.

"Had I ever thought about you," Lionel clarified. "The answer is, yes, I have, though not quite, I'm sure, in the same way that you meant."

"You know how I meant." Kal asked, and he looked back out at the city. "Before Lex, before anything. Did you?"

"Yes, I know how you meant. Before Lex, I didn't know who on earth you were, other than the boy that I helped adopt out. Once you came to my notice? Yes, I did. Many times I wondered if I could have distracted you from my son and had him evolve in other ways, but all things being said and done, I am glad I did not."

A low laugh, filled with nothing like humor, as he shook his head and tapped out his cigarette beside him, and flicked the butt out into the darkness. "What happened to you hating me, thanking God Clark pushed me down? Contradicting yourself there, Lionel, old buddy." Another smirk, as he tapped out another cigarette.

"Oh, don't me wrong," Lionel said calmly. "I absolutely detest you. However, I also feel sorry for you. Not because you're sympathetic, but because I recognize a defense mechanism when I see it. And because I know that the result that you are aiming for is not what you want."

Another snickering snort, but his hands were steady as he flickered the lighter open, and cupped his hand around the flame to light. "I'm sure you do." He mumbled, and finally got it lit, snapping the lighter closed. "Go away. You bugged me enough today."

"I'm not going away," Lionel said firmly. "And you're not going to prod me into another exchange of words. I'm going to remain here, smoking quietly, until you decide that you feel like talking."

"Then you are sure as fuck gonna be sitting here for a long ass time." Kal muttered, as he blew out a long breath and looked up at the sky. The cold from the stone under his butt was numbing his thighs, but rather than be uncomfortable, it was a welcome distraction. He loved being able to breathe in and feel the air circulate through his lungs, loved being affected by this earth he loved so very, very much.

"Time I have," Lionel said softly. "Can you say the same?"

It almost felt like his heart was physically ripped apart, and began to bleed across his chest. He didn't answer, just lifting the bottle and drinking down a long swallow of it.

"I didn't think you could," he said again, not raising his voice.

"Fuck you. You don't know me. Leave me alone." He snarled at him, even if the fingers that gripped the side of the block he was sitting on were shaking. "Go away."

"I'm not going to go away, Kal," Lionel said softly. "Clark thinks of me as a father--I would not abandon him when I knew he was troubled, and I will do the same for you as I would for him."

"Bullshit. Bull. Shit. All the help you were doing, talking like that there in the car. You hurt CK, you scared him. Weren't really caring for him then, were you?"

"Neither were you," Lionel said softly.

"At least I know when to stop."

"Do you really? Or did you only stop because we had arrived, and the brief pause gave you respite?" Lionel took another deep drag of his cigar.

"Fuck you. Stop talking to me." He turned and swung his legs up over the side of the building and stood up, taking the scotch and his pack of cigarettes before starting back towards the fire escape.

"Kal, please," Lionel called after him. "You're going to have to confide in someone. Don't you think it's better to confide in someone who has admitted they don't care, rather than hurt someone who does?"

That made him stop.

Talk to somebody who didn't give a fuck. Rather than talk to Lex, and see that fear and sadness in his eyes. Rather than try and talk to CK, which was something he just couldn't do.

He couldn't talk about this. Not at all. It went against everything he ever stood up for. He couldn't talk about it.

"No. I don't. Because Clark loves you, through some disgusting, twisted, warped way of his, and I'm not fucking that up."

"You couldn't," Lionel said simply. "I care for Clark too, and my feelings for you will in no way color how I feel about him, for the plain fact that despite being a part of him, you are nothing like him."

It was a lie. Even Kal knew he was a huge part of who Clark was, but he didn't feel like arguing. "I'm not talking to you. I'm not giving you more fuel to hurt CK."

"What makes you think I have anything against that young man?" Lionel asked sensibly. "He isn't here, and anything that you say to me now, I will not repeat."

"Bullshit."

"You're calling my honor and trustworthiness into question?" Lionel cracked a brief smile. "Smart man; I wouldn't blame you a bit. However, if it will help, I give you my word. What is said on this roof will not leave it."

"Again. Bull. Shit. You think I'm stupid, dude? think I got ignorant written across my forehead? Your word means jack shit to me. You sat there and told me I don't deserve Lex--I'm nothing to you. You think after all that, I'm gonna be all, "Oh, yes, Mr. Luthor, let me tell you all about how it fucking sucks to be me."?"

"You don't deserve him," Lionel said casually. "But that's beside the point. I'm doing this for his sake, and for Clark's. Not for yours and certainly not for mine."

That stung in his heart, and he snarled at him, pointing a finger with the hand he was holding the scotch at Lionel. "Who the fuck are you to say who Lex deserves?"

"His father."

"Fuck you. What a father you are. Ain't been there for the better part of his goddamn life."

"That's very true," Lionel admitted. "And when I was there, I made mistakes, which I regret possibly more than you or anyone else is capable of understanding."

"You fucked him up good and proper. So don't sit there and be all holier than thou with me, dude."

"I'm not being holier than thou, Kal. I'm merely saying, I am Lex's father, I care about Clark, and I can listen."

Kal let his hand fall again, the scotch tightly in his grip even as his shoulders sagged. He rubbed his free hand over his face and moved to one of the outcroppings of cement, sitting on it a few feet from Lionel. "Will you leave me alone after?"

"If that's what you want, then yes, I will," he agreed softly.

"Fine. I can't fucking stand you." He muttered the last part under his breath, before shifting and setting the scotch down between his bare feet. "What do you want to fucking know?"

He chuckled softly at the mutter, guessing what it was and ignoring it for the moment. "Why are you intent on hurting everyone around you?"

"Because. That's just the way I am." said with a snicker.

"Actually, that's not true," Lionel said calmly. "You were actually calm, polite, and caring to CK and my son before the competition. What changed?"

I realized they loved me. "Dunno. Don't really care. I feel very... liberated." Another sneer at him, as he shifted and took a drink from the bottle he'd set down on the ground.

"I believe you're lying to me. I believe you do know."

He shifted uncomfortably under the scrutiny, and just… he rolled his eyes to heaven and sighed. "Look. This will be easier on everybody involved at the end if there aren't any emotional attachments." Kal's heart ached for his aushna, for his CK, and the pain they were going to endure.

"You think the attachments are going to go away just because you're an insufferable ass? Those people love you, Kal, no matter how you act towards them. You're hurting them now and you're going to hurt them again when the time to leave comes."

"Enough with the name calling, Luthor. You aren't a jar of sugar here, you fucking old bastard." Kal said easily, as he took another drink and set the bottle back down again. "You know, if they don't like me now, they aren't going to like me then. Easy on everybody."

"You are a fool," Lionel said softly. "Look at my situation. No matter how I treated Lex, in the end, he still loved me. And I am only his father. You are his aushna'. How do you think he's going to handle this?"

"You know, as I see it? He's still got Clark here. Ain't gonna lose him, is he?"

Lionel blew a thinned breath out between his lips. "He will have Clark, but you will be gone. Your sentience will be, your ability to talk to him, see him, touch him--how is he going to react to know that you will be gone forever, and to get his aushna' back whole he is, in all essences, sacrificing you and CK both?"

"Yeah, no fuckin shit man." This time, his hands shook, badly, as he took a drag from the third cig of the evening. "Ain't jack shit I can do about it. But I can make him pissed off with me. If he's mad he ain't sad, is he?"

"Did Lex look angry to you tonight, Kal?" Lionel asked softly, picking up the pack and tossing it the short distance to the young man.

Kal caught it, easily, and set it beside him on the small cement seat. "He takes everything too personally." He growled, low in his throat, though he didn't move. "He's got time to get over it."

"Of course he's going to take it personally, you idiot. You're the person who means more to him than anything in the world--except, possibly, the other one of you."

"CK means everything." Kal said, quietly.

"So do you, or have you written yourself completely off?" Lionel asked as he turned, swearing softly as the cold stone made his bones ache during his position shift.

"Dude, I'm not anything but flesh and bone, with nasty fucking addictions, anger management problems, no education, severe lack of emotional skills."

Lionel shook his head; everything was becoming clearer and clearer as the young man talked. "You, Kal, are one half of the man that my son loves more than any other individual on this earth. How could you possibly think that you are less than perfectly godlike in his eyes? Do you really know him that little?"

He snickered at Lionel at that, and took another drag of his cigarette. "You thought you were only fucking with me, but you were right. Clark keeps me locked down tight, all the time. He doesn't listen to me."

"If you are this obnoxious to him? I can understand why he doesn't." He leaned forward despite the protest from his back. "Kal, if you never listen to another word that I say, listen to this. All you are doing is making everyone around you miserable for the short amount of time that you have left to be with them. What you do now is not going to make Lex, or CK, or anyone else feel any differently about you. All that it will make them do is regret that they were not able to spend more time with you because of your behavior."

"You don't get it. You really don't." Kal's hands were shaking nonstop now, and he had to stamp out his cig and wrap his arms tightly around his chest, hugging himself close. "You don't understand. I didn't expect you to, cause you're ignorant as ape shit, but still. All this wisdom and you haven't got a fucking clue dude. Not one." He pierced him with a hard look. "All I do, all the time, is give. I give to everyone, I give and give and don't take care of myself." He wasn't explaining it correctly, but he did his best. "I never just… I'm always helping other people, and I'm tired of it."

"But you don't let other people help you," he said softly. "I saw Lex try, and you've rejected him at every turn. You take care of other people, and you never let anyone help you, or take care of you. I don't think you understand what I'm trying to tell you. This isn't about whom takes care of whom, in the end, Kal. In the end, it is about, have you had nearly enough of touching my son or your other half? Have you tasted everything in the world that you want to taste? Or are you too busy driving people away from you and insulating yourself from the possibility of hurt that you have forgotten that you have a chance to live?"

At Lionel's quiet words his eyes had filled, and he had to drop his head down to scrape his fingers through his hair, so Lionel wouldn't see. His entire body shuddered, as hard as he tried to keep it from doing so, and he swallowed, tightly, around the lump in his throat. He didn't want to hear any of this, at all, and he closed his eyes to stay away from it.

Lionel got up with a little grunt, and walked slowly across the gravel, and put his hand on Kal's shoulder. "I'm sorry to be the one to say these things to you, Kal, because believe it or not, my intent here isn't to hurt you."

"That's a bunch of bullshit." He was horrified by how horribly vulnerable his voice sounded, and his fingers fisted in his hair.

"I can understand why you think that, but it isn't actually true."

"I'm so--.." he stopped himself. Couldn't admit he was terrified in front of this man, so he just rubbed the heels of his hands against his eyes, trying to stop the flood.

"Afraid?" Lionel asked softly, moving to sit down on the other end of the little outcropping.

"No." No fucking way.

"Then what?"

Terrified. "I'm just... look, its great that you tried to help me, and all," His voice was shaking, and he turned his face away from where Lionel had sat, hands clasping tightly, elbows on his knees. "But you said you'd leave me alone."

"You're just too stubborn to admit that you're afraid?" Lionel didn't budge. "Yes, I did say I'd leave you alone, and if that's what you want, then I can walk back inside the roof access confident that I can look at my son and say, yes, I tried to reach him. But we both know that you're not all right."

"Why are you doing this?" Kal suddenly sobbed, loudly, and grasped his head in his hands again as he squeezed his eyes shut, trapping the sobs in his shaking chest. "Why wont you just leave me the fuck alone?"

"Because as I told you before, I care for Clark. And I'm doing this for his sake, because I could not look at him in the eye ever again if I didn't at least try to help you now."

Kal would have rather bitten through his lip then cry in front of this man, but here he was, and there was nothing he could do. With each breath he tried to suppress another one came up to choke him, and oh, God, he was so embarrassed, but he couldn't stop. He just gripped his hair as hard as he could, trying to keep it all bottled in, but... so much for that.

"You don't KNOW! You don't fucking KNOW what its like to know you have so few hours left to live, to know that you're going to die and no one is going to miss you, to die and know you didn't get to eat a cheeseburger, or watch a football game, or read a book, or write a poem, or fucking go to the park and play on the swings like a little kid. You don't know how it feels knowing how much you want to live but knowing for the sake of everyone around you, you can't. You don't know, you don't know, so don't sit there and try to pretend like you FUCKING UNDERSTAND!"

Lionel leaned over and put his arms gently around Kal's shoulders, sliding his hands through the spiked, dyed hair to link his fingers with Kal and ease them out of his head. He didn't say anything, just pulled him close and held him, letting Kal rail into his shoulder. "Then tell the world how it feels," Lionel said softly. "You may not have the... what did you call it, the book smarts?... that CK got, but you have the passion, Kal. Leave behind something for the world to see, and know that you were here."

He was shaking so hard, and he was certain he was hurting Lionel even as he linked their fingers tightly together. His sobs quieted, held inside his wracking chest, and he curled up against Lionel, dragging his legs to his chest as he hid in Lionel's hair and his terror and his grief threatened to consume him. He wanted nothing more than to see the world, to see the ocean, to sleep in soft sheets. And his CK. "He wont ever get to see anything. He doesn't even know. He doesn't know what's happening."

Lionel didn't try to pull his fingers away, just letting Kal squeeze them as hard as he could. He just held the sobbing young man close, rubbing his back gently. "Don't tell him," Lionel said softly. "Let him enjoy what he can, until he can't any longer. You should do the same; enjoy what you can, Kal. Live as though you don't have a tomorrow, because for you, it is the truest thing in the world."

It was a little after two AM when Lex came in, and he hadn't expected to see his father still awake. But there he was, sitting on the couch, casually smoking a cigar--which he had seen Lionel do more in the last year than in the last twenty--and staring morosely at the wall. "Dad?"

Lionel startled slightly as Lex came in. "Ah, Lex. You're home. Excellent. I think Dominic and I are going to be heading home; we've got a teleconference in the morning, with the Tokyo branch, and we've work to do before it happens." He pushed himself to his feet, and hid the grimace. "Your... what do you call them? Twins?" At Lex's weary nod, he continued. "Your twins are resting in the bedroom, waiting for you. They've had a bit of a hard night, and I believe CK was crying for you earlier, Dominic said."

Lex just nodded blankly, at everything, as he took off his overcoat and tossed it over the back of the chair. "Thanks, Dad. I'm... exhausted. I'll see you in the morning, all right?"

"Get some rest, son." Lionel patted Lex on the shoulder, and waited until he was in the bedroom before going to his own. Dominic was lying on the rumpled bed, and he shook his husband's shoulder lightly. "Dominic? It's time to go home."

"Mm?" A low murmur, as his blood shot eyes opened. He was so drained, so completely exhausted after an exhausting week of no sleep and medical tests, but he pushed himself up without having to be told twice, and rubbed at his eyes, before pushing his glasses on his nose. "Did I doze off? I'm sorry love. I was waiting for you." His words were broken with a hard yawn, which he covered his mouth for, before rubbing his aching shoulder. "Come on. Love, you look terrible." he leaned up to kiss his cheek. "Get your cup of coffee. I left it in the microwave to keep warm, its in the Styrofoam cup."

"I feel rather terrible," Lionel said softly. His heart was quietly heavy, both for his son and for Kal, but he didn't explain as he returned the soft kiss. "But it's nice to know that you don't hesitate to tell me I look like crap." A little smile, and he stood up too, stretching. "Do you need coffee too? I am sure there is at least one restaurant open where you can get it."

At that Dominic gave a grin, a tired one but there it was, as he leaned in to kiss his husband again softly, just because he could. "What kind of mate would I be if I didn't tell you, my lovely one?" he asked, as he smoothed Lionel's hair gently, then smoothed his own shirt, and squeezed his hand as he led the way out of the bedroom. "I'll be fine. I had a bit more rest today than you did. I'll drive, mm?"

"We can always roust Phillip to bring the limo around, and have Lex drive your car back in the morning," Lionel suggested, following behind Dominic and pausing to pick up his coffee from the microwave.

"Are you joking? Beloved, its..." A glance at his watch… all he saw was bleariness for the moment, until he focused. "Two thirty in the morning. We'll be having none of that. And Dogwood can't schedule our appointment for any other time, as he's doing the children's library as well, so on we go."

"Oh, that's right. I had nearly forgotten our meeting with the overly-ebullient Mr. Ross." He sighed. "Home we go then."

"Did you honestly think anything but my daughter would rouse me from my sleep?" He asked incredulously, even as he rose a tired brow of amusement. He plucked Lionel's coffee from the microwave, after nuking it for a few seconds, and picked up his keys with a weary sigh. "Lex made it in alright?"

Lionel nodded. "Just came in moments ago, and is, if I know my son, likely in the shower, washing off whatever he took, drank, or smoked before he gets into bed with the two Clark twins."

"Of course. He's his cell phone if he needs us." Dominic shrugged into his jacket, patting his pockets to make sure he had everything with him, and shoved the bow tie in his pocket, the first two buttons of the dress shirt undone, thankfully. He sighed, yawned, sighed again, and took his husbands hands in his own as he led them out of the apartment.

Lionel followed, pausing and juggling his coffee as he locked the penthouse door behind them, and then sighed as he followed Dominic down towards the elevator. "I may sleep in the car, if you don't mind."

"Not at all, darling. There we are… locked up tight?" A glance at the apartment door told him yes, so he nodded to himself and called for the elevator.

Five minutes later, after a good night to the nightman sitting in front of the security monitors in the lobby, Dominic was unlocking the jag door for his husband. He left the door open for him and went around, getting in in front of the wheel, and revving the engine quietly. it was still cool at night at this time in the year, and Dominic was glad of his light suit jacket as he turned the heater on to a low setting.

Lionel's back was aching from the long period spent sitting on the cold roof and hard concrete as he and Kal had talked, and he winced getting into the car. He reminded himself quietly to check with the doctors in the morning, and see what their recommendation was, growling softly as he thought of himself with arthritis.

"What are you growling at, darling?" Dominic asked, tipping his head at him as he pulled his seat belt on. He fastened it and put on his headlights, basking the inside of the car with green light, as he motioned for Lionel to put on his seat belt.

"My age," he said with a grimace. "I went up to the roof for a cigar earlier, and I am now paying the price for sitting on cold stone while doing so."

"Back bothering you, isn't it?" He asked quietly, as he ran his fingers over his lovers back before he sat back, and winced in sympathy for him. "We'll see about you getting the proper care come Monday, love. My poor husband." But his voice was quiet and gentle, as he leaned in and kissed the corner of his lips, then his mouth, just because he was in an oddly affectionate mood.

"Proper care, as if I'm some invalid? Dominic... it's nothing more than old bones not liking the coolness of the night and the hard stone. I will get warm, lie down, and it will go away."

"Proper care being pain medication much better than Motrin." Dominic soothed rumpled, proud feathers, as he took the car out of park and with a glance at his mirrors, started down the curved road and out to the main one. "I had Phillip leave the jag, because I wasn't sure when we'll be coming to Metropolis again, and its just sitting in the garage love."

"That's quite all right," he said with a sigh, raising the headrest and lowering the seat back just a little as he belted his seat belt and covered his legs with his jacket. The coffee had gone into the cup holder, and Lionel's eyes were closed even as he spoke. "If we are lucky, we will not be returning here for quite some time."

"Mmm. Our next appointment with Elaine isn't for another two weeks, indeed." Dominic answered quietly, his voice pitched low for his tired lover. "You'll tell me what happened with Kal tomorrow, mm?" He asked softly, as he gunned the gas and got them out into the street and up to the exit of the highway.

"Which time?" Lionel asked cynically, the mere mention of the boy bringing Lionel's fingers to the bridge of his nose, then spreading out to massage his temples.

Dominic smiled but kept quiet as he started up the street, keeping five miles under the speed limit for safety, at this late hour and at how tired he was, but he was alert and awake, as he put low music on to keep himself that way. "Maybe tomorrow, after Dogwood leaves, we can go back to bed?" He smiled crookedly at his husband. "Pancakes in bed sounds very good."

"Bed actually sounds very good." Lionel didn't bother to open his eyes. "I don't need pancakes to enhance the experience, just a smooth hot toddy and then warm sheets, soft mattress, and quiet."

"And me?" hopeful little note in his voice.

"Having you there is a foregone conclusion, little cricket," he said, letting the smile that curved his lips enter his voice. "I assumed you would be sharing the toddy with me, warming the sheets, and sleeping beside me."

The hopeful note turned to amusement as he chuckled softly, and put his blinker on, as he turned into the highway ramp, letting the little jag speed up.

He never saw the truck veering to much to the left on the highway as he entered it, and by the time it came to his attention, caught there in his blind spot, it was too late.

He let out a sharp, terrified cry as he fought for control of the car as he heard the crunch of metal coming from his left, but he had enough time to see the car he was about to hit as he roared for his lover to hold on.

The jag hit the small corolla bumper first, spinning to the left as Dominic pumped the breaks, and crashed again, on Lionel's side, as the truck from behind him followed all the way. The car Dominic had hit swerved and the scream of breaks echoed even into the cabin of the Jag as they finally came to a stop.

 

-fin-

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